OP same happened here too

> I wish I would just not be turned on by this kind of thing. I wish it would shock and disgust me instead.

That would be hypocritic.
OP I have a much simpler solution for you:
Just keep fapping.
I know the reason I do it is so my dick cums and I can start thinking with my brain again.
Don't resist fapping. It's catastrophic.
Just think about it. Are you harming anyone? no.