Hey everyone, 18 year old Anon here. I'm asking for your opinion on how I'm doing wit life/relationships in general.
So last year I was in the hospital for serious depression over things like not having a girlfriend, feeling stuck in life, being afraid of death, and not knowing how to deal with people. When I got out, I was gone for a grand total of two weeks before I checked back in after a rather stressful situation. When I got out I had really bad paranoia, but after a few weeks I realized I needed to get my shit together and focus on school and whatnot. Then comes this girl I've like for awhile. She was my first girlfriend back in middle school and I asked her out again just a few months ago (like, April). Rejected, felt depressed but then realized I no longer felt chained down to anything (though I shouldn't have felt chained down in the first place).
Finally, I finished High School and Graduation was probably the best event of my life. Over the summer I endlessly looked for a job and had a rather odd event at a friend's party: a girl took interest in me. Well, I guess it's not that odd, I suppose I'm good looking or cute, but that's according to what some people have told me. Well, we flirted and whatnot and fell asleep together, but I had to get up early and leave. So, saying goodbye, I left, which is the last I spoke to her.
So now I'm in a community college until I transfer when I figure out what I want to do and I finally got a job. I love my job and I'm taking tasks that require me to interact with people in order to get better in social situations. Here's my next hurdle to tackle: a car. I have no license yet and could get it if my dad would let me get in another few hours of practice. Problem is: he's a complete douchebag when it comes to that and is reluctant to let me drive.
Onto my dad: he's a total financial wreck. We have no heat at the moment, and his car's about to be taken away any day now (adding to my car problem). I'm constantly cleaning up his shit around the house and it drives me nuts. Here's the thing though: he wouldn't be in so much shit if he would give up on his bodybuilding he does on the side and get a part-time job. My mother's told him this, but he says that's "not a possibility".
As for my mom: I used to live with her until she moved out so my dad could move into my place so I could get some "father influence". My mom's a great person, she doesn't stop sacrificing what she has for both me and my sister. She's now offered for me to o live with her because she knows I shouldn't be living with a man who can't even support himself. So now she's looking for a place where we can live while I'm stuck in this town trying to make a lot out of little.
I'm interested in what you think. Am I doing the right thing by choosing to live with my mom? Do you think I'm trying hard enough to deal with my own issues? Thoughts, suggestions, anything?
It sounds like you are motivated to get your life together. There are so many people that like to be in the shit hole they are in. It doesn't help to constantly worry about your dad, when you should be concerned about your own future. Take up your mother's offer, and count your blessings that you have someone that wishes to look after you and help you out. Do your best in school and at work.