>Women are like pets[...]to know that half are inferior based on their genes alone is such an existential crisis.

Well, I'm not surprised you're having difficulties,... For the record, I'm male, but I'm surrounded by very deep and intelligent women in my environment. Actually, a good deal of the most intelligent and serious people I've met in my life were women. There is no need to refute any of your assertions, you just have to go out in the world, and interact with real-life women.

I suspect you only deal with women when you are trying to flirt with them, which is a very special and non representative situation. If you work and collaborate with women outside of romantic and sexual interests, you'll notice that they are basically humans. I'm sure that if you were born a woman, you would now be thrashing men, basically because what you are complaining is about the behavior of "the other sex" during romantic and sexual courtship.

Besides, what you describe as "to talk in silly voices or get ludicrously excited over nothing" are simply instinctive flirt methods used by females. Males have their own quirks (take space, display upmanship), and it's just part of the game. You may not like it, but you do not need to develop a fixation on it, because in the end a relationship is much deeper than that. It's a bit like saying that you don't want to live anymore because in order to live you have to defecate regularly, and you can't stand it. Why not, but you would be missing the big picture about what's to be alive ^^

As a side question, do you have trouble having male friends?