Haven't been able to feel much joy or pleasure over the past few years for multiple reason (literally never leave house, depression?, quickly losing interest, difficult to start new thing...) but it feels a main reason is that I'm too stubborn/spiteful/uptight everywhere online. I hate having to be in communities or play games with online factors since I just can't stand other users and how terrible their actions/interests/methods/mindsets are. It's at the point that I have no place to call home due to how "awful" all the places I know (and assume the rest) are, so I'm at the computer all day with not even the slightest interaction.

I can't even enjoy games/shows/movies because of the association of the work to the communities out there (that and not having the energy to start new things). I'm at the point where I even point to dumb myself down to the sheepish status, just so I can enjoy stuff once again.

How would I go about being able to enjoy new things with all the time I have and not feel disgusted at other people online, any Internet community that I could potentially take an interest in, and not feel terrible when other people like some of the things I do?

Hey OP, please be patient with me but I didn't quite fully understand what you were trying to say;
Are you saying that you don't like being in communities or playing games you don't like? And if you try to enjoy them, you feel like dumbing yourself down?
P.S: I really want to help.

>>2
I guess that I can't stand communities due to the people in the and the overall ideal of what one is, and that I can't enjoy anything due not being able to get myself to do so and because of the people in sad communities and the association the game/series has. And that it seems if I were to ever find a way to enjoy it, I'd need to dumb myself down, become as sheepish as they are, and force myself to enjoy the concept of the community in order to even potentially enjoy it.

>>3
OP the way you write is difficult for me to comprehend so bear with me and correct me if I'm mistaken.
From what I understand, It seems to me you simply don't like fandoms of games or series because people hype it up.
You aren't able to enjoy yourself because it's hyped up and can't get yourself to do so.
And the only way you can enjoy is having to dumb yourself down. And you don't like that. Is that it?

>>4
Kind of.

Basically, I want to be able to enjoy new things without myself weighing me down and especially if other people like the thing as well.

I also want to be able to tolerate online communities without having a veil and spite and resentment toward them.

>>5
I think I understand how you feel.
Seeing too many people like the same thing can be irritating.
I don’t know the exact reason, but it just feels annoying that people swarm in the same interest as you, I guess.
Sometimes It makes you wonder if you’re mentally alright when you see them dumbing down in a fandom.

Now, I've a question- Tell me about these fandoms that bother you. What fandoms or communities are they?

>>6
I just can't stand them (or people in general); I hate how they react to anything related to the series/how they share similar ideas and to their environment and anyone who shares/criticizes them. It feels awful seeing so many people take part in something or enjoy/dislike something on the sole basis of just because. The social/generic nature that revolves around is also extremely unnecessary and gimmicky, yet most people there feel it's crucial to have it for some jaded reason. It's always like this but is especially bad when it involved with something I could potentially enjoy.

Pretty much every forum/Internet community I come across is like this, and it's really just a question of how much I can tolerate it before getting flustered.

>>7
I'm sorry if I ask questions, I'm merely curious.
When you say you can’t tolerate how they react to the series, which way of reaction bothers you? Is it something they say about the series or is it something they say to you?

Why does it bother you if many people get together with one interest? Does it make you feel like your interest is nothing special because many have it too?

I understand when you say when you feel people are bumming down things which you could potentially enjoy because they do it too much.
It's a matter of tolerance, really. If you want to take part in communities still, you would just have to bear with the different kinds of people.
People hype everything. You just need to like what you like, and not let them get to you :)

>>8
It's just their general actions and mindset about everything they do.

I guess; also, it's the association of the thing with the various groups that enjoy it as well.

It's not like there's a few or a subset in a community that acts like that; it's pretty much everyone (at least everyone that posts/I see). Even if I wanted to try to bear with it and enjoy stuff I would otherwise be turned-off by, I wouldn't know what to do or how to go by it.

Connecting with others is the greatest pleasure in life. Go do that.