Yes I have a boyfriend and I'm happy with him.. It makes me happy with each compliment he gives me. But I know that half of the things he says to me are just to comfort me. He always says how I'm a little chubby but he likes that because I'm cuddly. Well, a few days ago I said I was going to get some medicine that should help me lose weight. He was so happy it killed me. He sends me mixed messages like that, and so what I have to do is assume what he likes. He says he likes my dull dark brown hair, but I know he wants me to have black hair. All of his crushes and friends that he was best friends with had black hair. When I bring up getting lowlights, or just dying it black, he gets sad/mad at me. I know he wants a skinny, black haired latino girl but I'm just a "cuddly" pale, dark brown haired, irish girl.
My boyfriend would always say how he was "forever alone" and stuff like that. I thought "Maybe he's like me" which is partially why I tricked him into being my boyfriend. Yes, I say tricked, because he didn't want to even after the 5th time I asked. I finally convinced him and he didn't even like me back then. He would watch his ecchi anime instead of spend time with me. He loves Kuroneko and Mio and he watched some sort of anime with nekos everywhere and it kills me to think of that. Him and I agreed that cheating isn't just physical. Adultery is a sin. A sin is anything you think, say, or do. So him fapping to other girls breaks my heart. But theres no way to stop him. He says he changed now, but I have no proof. His internet is fast enough to download a series within an hour, and then he can watch it when I'm not around. Oh, yeah, we're a mostly online couple. We've visited each other though.. He spent 3 months with me and my family, over the holidays. so he has plenty of time where I'm not there. I know being jealous of anime is dumb and immature, but look at it my way. If you had a girl you really liked and she said she liked you and would not like anyone else, and then you find out she has a ton of Justin Bieber photoshopped to be naked, or shota everywhere.. I mean.. That'd upset you a little.. right?
Back to the forever alone thing I brought up. He would always say that, and thats how I felt. But he was anything but. All of his friends were girls. He liked about half of them, and some of them uglier than me. They all had darker skin and black hair. His online friends were quite similar. There was a girl I knew back when I was 12. Brittany. I liked her then. But years passed, I was 14. I met my boyfriend. My boyfriend and a mutual friend of ours, and I would always hang out together and have a great time on the netz. Then Brittany came back. Our mutual friend knew her as well. Well, Brittany started to replace me. She wasn't that pretty and she was really mexican and I thought she was annoying because she was always "randum!!! XD" and always flirting with my friend who wasn't my boyfriend yet. They started to become the magnificent trio. The trio I was a part of. But a trio isn't 4. and her and I didn't click right. Oh but I guess they all did. So theres a perfect example as to why I feel like I never get attention. This is just one of many. Heres another.