Man, I finally gave up on waiting for a decent translation, and watched Oyasumi's.
This is... horrible.
It's got mistakes in basic grammar (they couldn't even get "yume to kibou no mahou shoujo" right!), awkward phrasings, and non-sensical word choices, like leaving in japanese terms for no good reason and putting in giant translation notes, and even making up words like "kidult" for the ending, which makes no sense given the original lyrics.
Maybe it'll get licensed. They couldn't butcher it much worse.