( ´ω`) hello kids!

(・∀・) Grandpa, did they have anime when you were young?

( ´ω`) Did they ever! Of course, we had to get it directly from Japan in those times and it required a six month journey by clipper ship to get a shipment.

( ´ω`) Many brave men were lost in those voyages. Many, many men....

(・∀・) Wow, they must have been really dedicated!

( ´ω`) Otakus were made of sterner stuff in those days, Junior. We didn't have "subtitles" or speciality mail order businesses. In fact, before women became anime fans, we had to multiply asexually and ensure a viable genetic population by kidnapping people from Star Trek conventions.

(・∀・) but I heard that woman where the first western anime fans... is this all just a clever atempt at brain washing?

( ´ω`) Otakus are above genders, m'boy. We sprang from the very stuff that anime is created from. We first appeared as small, furry balls with brown and white patches. We were called "mogwai" at one point, hiding in our homes, watching only anime and avoiding all natural light and could reproduce with only a few drops of water. This is why Otakus, even today, avoid taking baths and showers to avoid over-population,

( ´ω`) Then there was the night one of us ate something after midnight. I... I can't talk about it....

(・∀・) Grandpa, what was Halloween like when you were younger?

( ´ω`) We had cosprayoween where we made costumes out of sheep skin... There was no fabric available you see.

(・∀・) Grandpa, I need to poo-poo but someone is using the washroom already. What should I do??

( ´ω`) Hold it. Pain builds character!

(・∀・) Grandpa, do you think we should let the WTFux dudes in?

( ´ω`) They should keep the Fux out.

( ´ω`) And the WT, too.

(・∀・) What's so bad about the WT Grandpa? I heard W.T. Snacks is an admirable fellow!

( ´ω`) Junior, whoever told you that is full of aids.

( ´ω`) 566, congratulations on getting the joke.

(・∀・) Grandpa! What´s wrong with the world?

( ´ω`) Well, Junior, you existing isn't helping matters.

(・∀・) Grandpa, do you like Yukorin?

( ´ω`) Truly a delicate orchid blossom of the East and easy to admire by any man. I have her perfume.

( ´ω`) Nabisco Vanilla Extract.

(・∀・) じちゃん。僕、日本語で喋ってもいい？

( ´ω`)　われはそんなこと読めないですから。。。

(・∀・) ぬるぽ

( ´ω`) が

(・∀・) waps..

Relevant Translations:
>>573= (・∀・) Grandpa. Is it ok for me to chatter in Japanese too?
>>575= ( ´ω`) I'm unable to read that kind of thing though...

(・∀・) Grandpa! You need subtitles!

( ´ω`) I have fansubs, go look for them kid.

(・∀・) you're otaku

(・∀・) Grandpa, have you ever met the King of all Cosmos?

(・∀・) Otoko no ko wa onna no ko no koto itsumo oikaketeru 〜♬

( ´ω`) Ichi-nichi-juu onna no ko no koto bakari kangaeteru 〜♫

(・∀・) Dakedo otoko no ko wa yappari sukoshi baka de 〜♬

( ´ω`) Zen zen onna no ko no kimochi nante hora wakaranai mitai 〜♫

(・∀・) Uu hontou ni dame yo ne obaka-san 〜♪
(・∀・) Oshiete hoshii no obakasan-san 〜♪
(・∀・) Sou kono yo de ichi-ban 〜♪
(・∀・) Taisetsuna koto wa 〜♪
(・∀・) Yappari taimingu dato omou kedo...nanchite na 〜♪

( ´ω`) Onna no ko mo otoko no ko no koto naze ka suki ni naru no 〜♪
( ´ω`) Hi-to-ban-juu nemurenai nante kurai muchuu ni naru 〜♪

(・∀・) Dakedo otoko no ko wa yappari itsumo baka de 〜♪
( ´ω`) Zen zen onna no ko no kokoro nante mada wakaranai mitai 〜♪

(・∀・) RaRa RaRaRaRa RaRaRaRaRaRaRaRaRaRaRa, Ra RaRaRaRa Ra
( ´ω`)RaRa RaRaRaRa RaRaRaRaRaRaRaRaRaRaRa, Ra RaRaRaRa Ra

(・∀・) これは、山手線ですか？

( ´ω`) This is Red Light District my son.

( ´ω`) What's that ching-chong crap, kid? In this thread, we're sticking to the Queen's English!

(・∀・) Granpa, it seems there is a time paradox here!

( ´ω`) hello kids!

( ( ((( ´ω`))) ) )

(・∀・) Oh no, a space-time distortion! Granpa, what will we do?

(・∀・) Oh no, a space-time distortion! Granpa, what will we do?

( ´ω`) hello kids!

(・∀・) Grandpa, what was life like before the internet?

( ´ω`) We had books I think. Something non-something.

(・∀・) Grandpa,I shot the sheriff! (Or is it I will shoot...)

( ´ω`) At least you didn't shoot the deputy sonny.

(・∀・) Grandpa, I want to learn to play like Petey Wheatstraw. Where's the nearest crossroads?

(・∀・) Grandpa?... Are you holding back answering because you want 600GET?

( ´ω`) At my age, 600 is nothing special.

( ´ω`) lol interweb

(・∀・) Grandpa, you fail got.

( ´ω`)ノ Pull my finger, Junior!

(・∀・) Grandpa, you like scat! ew.

( ´ω`) Take care, Junior. Given enough exposure to the internet, you'll come to like anything!

(・∀・) Grandpa, I want to be just like Densha Otoko!

( ´ω`) A true DQN strives to be Itoko Otoko.

( ´ω`) That's an admirable goal Junior! Back in my day, we created haiku poems about our idols:
Posting on 2ch,
even a nerd can find love,
Densha Otoko!

(・∀・) Is 2ch really 2 syllables? In any case, I wrote a haiku for you Grandpa-
Surprisingly wise,
packed with D.Q.N. spirit:
stinky old Grandpa!

( ´ω`)
　　⊂彡☆))Д´)　>>609

(`Д´) Geez Grandpa, I was trying to be nice!

(・∀・)
　　⊂彡☆))ω´)

( ´ω`) you just need to keep your mouth shut sometimes, sonny.

(・∀・)

( ´ω`)

(・⌢・)

( ´ω`) Cheer up, emo Junior!

(・∀・) Gradpa! You say daddy me snow me gonna bleeeam. Ali key bu-n bu-n nea.

( ´ω`) OMG WTFBBQ LOLZ fgsfds or whatever you kids reply to garbage like that these days

(・∀・) Gradpa! what do you know about postmodern alienation?

( ´ω`) I know it's not as imporant as blowing your nose every once in a while when you cannot even pronounce "Grandpa" correctly.

( ´ω`) Sonny, I'm sorry if I didn't tell you this before, but... Gradpa is dead. He couldn't stand more than a year of being a PhD.

(/｡＼)ｲﾔﾝ!

( ´ω`) lol what

(・∀・) Grandpa! Have you heard about Bridget?

　　　┌――――――――┐
　　 　｜.B１�@�A�B�C�D�E.　|
　 　　｜�F�G�H�I�J�K�L�M｜
　 　　└――――――――┘
　　　　 ┌―――┬―――┐
　　　　　|　　　　　 |　　　　　 |┌──────┐
　　　　　|　　　　　 |　　　　　 |│Out of service│
　　　　　|　　　　　 |　　　　　 |└──────┘
　 age 　∧＿∧ 　　／￣￣￣￣￣￣
　　▲C<丶｀∀´> ＜　comon comon！
　　▽ ＼　　　　）　| ＼＿＿＿＿＿＿
　sage　｜Ｏ　　|＿|＿＿＿|
　　　　　〈＿_〈＿〉

(・∀・) Gradpa! I copy paste to say: Gradpa! What do you do?

( ´ω`) You. Come over here...

( ´ω`)ハアハア

( ´ω`) "vocabulary is teh rohd 2 win intarweb." So build it, sonny.

(・∀・) Gradpa! You tried to reply to your own post but failed!

( ´ω`) Somebody busted my interweb. You damn kids been screwing with it?

(・∀・) N, no way Grandpa! There... there was this one-armed man, you see....

(・∀・) Grandpa! There's a young woman who's posing and prancing around seductively over her webcam, and something weird is going on in my pants! What should I do?

( ´ω`) Don't change the subject!
　　⊂彡☆))Д´)　>>633

( ´ω`) But go prvt with her anyway. Always go pvt!

( ´ω`) Pvt. Johnson and Lt. Conrad in 3rd division! Follow me! We've got soviets at 3 o'clock!

(・A・) You've having flashbacks again, Grandpa! Snap out of it!

(・∀・) Grandpa, if you could have one super power what would it be?

( ´ω`) To bring back Grandma at age 25. sigh

(・∀・) Grandpa! I beat tetris!

( ´ω`) The only way to win is not to play.

(・∀・) Grandpa! I beat Super Mario Bros.!

( ´ω`) Congratulations, Junior. Of course, back in the day we would have saved the princess in real life instead of wasting our time behind a flickering screen for hours.

(・∀・) Grandpa! You need more overlords.

　　　　------------ 、___
　　 / ￣￣￣7/'￣￣|| |__/＼
　 /' 　 　 ∧//　∧∧|| |　＼　＼　　　　　　　　flopflopflop
[/＿______.(ﾟ//[］(ﾟДﾟ )|| | <I hate overlord day！＼　＼ 　ﾐ　　ﾐ
||　　　 ___||￣￣ Ｕ　|| |＿＿__＼　＼　ﾐ　　ﾐ
lO|--- lO゜l l 　 　 　　||_|ニニニニニニｌ|( ´ω ( ´ω) ( ´ω)
|_∈口∋￣_l______ｌ⌒ ｌ.|＿＿＿__| ｌ⌒ｌ_||( ´ω) ( ´ω ( ´ω) ´ω`)
──`--'───`ー'─── ｰ' ー' ‐┐( ´ω) ω) ( ´ω`)
　　　　　　　　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 |　( ´ω) ( ´ω ( ´ω)
　　　　　　　　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 |　　( ´ω ( ´ω) ( ´ω)
　　　　　　　　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 |　　　( ´ω) ( ´ω)
　　　　　　　　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 |　　ﾟ､ヾ ( ´ω) ω) ｡/ｯﾟ
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ι〜〜〜〜〜っつ~~~~

( ´ω`) This Garden needs less WakabaMark :(

(・∀・) Grandpa! What should we do with the people who can't type your name right? Gradpa isn't cool

(・∀・) Gradpa! Disregard my last post. Because You Are Coolest!

( ´ω`) Why thank you child. Let me guess, disregard that anonymous sucks cocks?

(・∀・) Actually, it's "disregard that, I suck cocks". Note the added comma.

( ´ω`)Just because you are a dateless insecure geek, don't rag on inexperienced internet users

(・A・) …

(・∀・) NO U LOL

( ´ω`) Did you even understand what I said son?