Once a upon a time there was a....
The second thing, however, was to
escape from that group of sweating fat guys running after her
. Again she decided to use
"The grande scoll of secret animu techniques"
But she hesitated because
it may be a trap.
But on the other hand, the scroll seemed very
VIP quality, so he deicided that
It was the best course of action. Listed on Section 327 was
The technique Kage Bunshin No Jutsu. Recognising the potential of this
he changed his gender back to she.
She then attemted to perform that technique, but it failed. It was an extremely unpleasant humiliation, so she decided to
do that eel thing so popular these days on JAV.
The technique worked! The Sweaty fat guys were stunned long enough for Nevada to make a clean getaway.
Aware of the fact that her part of the story would soon be over, she quickly travelled to Yaranaika International Airport,
to go back in Japan, and allow Bridget, who is to arrive in Mexico in 2 minutes, to become the main character.
As Bridget left the airport,
and that was the last of we saw of her. Meanwhile
confusion arose as we lost track of what was happening. But all was well, because
it was tl;dr anyway.
Nevada, Bridget and random characters from old posts decided then to fight to the death to decide who would be the main character from now on. The fight would take place in a small and dirty back-alley of Mexico.
Nevada started to
wake up, only to realize that her plane had landed.
When she disembarked from the plane and entered the terminal Nevada saw an unbelievable sight. Pedobear was waiting for her. He was wearing the clothes she discarded back in >>68-80. They were washed and pressed. The sweater had been fixed with a big I-Heart-Loli patch on the front. She didn't know what to think.
And so he grabbed her boobs.
What was it about that damned bear that made her react that way? Strange thoughts were buzzing through her head like a bees in a honey comb. Only thought was clear in the swarm; she had to...
The shower worked wonders on the off-topic 4chan germs that Pedobear had contaminated her with. As she left the shower, she felt the strong DQN spirit
leave her body and head for a new hero as she passed out into the toilet.
At the same time, Bridget
Nevada thought back on all the people she met during her journey. There was the Wise 2GET of the castle and the Young knight. Gandpa and and his alter-ego Darkpa also came to mind. She remembered the scent of longcat's milk-soaked fur and wading through dead ninja with Hotaru. She could feel her mind slipping away as thoughts of Moot disguised as santa clause but with a mexican hat and a large bag of donations, W.T. Snacks, and !WAHa.06x36 floated past. "Is this how my part of the story ends?"
!WAHa.06x36 was determined to get a bigger part. So he lifted his head back and called
for take-out ramen.
the delivery guy not knowing that !WAHa.06x36 was actually NARUTO in disguise!!!!
and it happens....something that no one ever expected....
The spanish inquisition. !WAHa.06x36, startled by such
force, continued to calmly slurp at the noodles.
But this was Mexico, not Japan, and loud slurping is frowned down here. So he ended up in jail, where he saw
W.T. Snacks
and
his large supplies of AIDS
"So that's where those supplies were," !WAHa.06x36 thought to himself.
"Well, well, well." said Snacks, rubbing his
large supplies of AIDS
"I see your Shwartz is as big as mine!," proclaimed Snacks.
"But mine is better", replied !WAHa.06x36, "and mine is
bio-luminescent.
I have to be careful because it reacts violently with...
moot
(who is OKAMA), and even more violently with
peanut butter
that has been contaminated with jelly. But that wasn't important, because
orange juice inhibits the reaction, preventing explosion.
So therefore there was no chance of explotion. But
there was lotion.
And locomotion.
And that was how everyone got on the /dqn Man Train. Tied to the tracks a couple of kilometres ahead was
the battleship Yamato.
"Hey guys, what's going on in this Man Train", Nevada asked. W.T. Snacks replied
"Why the fuck are you back again?", totally ignoring her nonsensical statement.
W.T. Snacks stuffed Nevada into the fire of the steam locomotive. Her moe power provided it with energy for all eternity, and she never left it.
That is, she didn't leave until that fateful day when...
she slit cracky-chan's throat to power the fountain of eternal youth.
..killing herself in the process.
ZA ENDO.
Of Part I.
= insert commercials here =
In the area on the lunar surface called "The Sea of Dreams", Thock was slowly boozing himself up. He was
celebrating the return of the eternal chicken getting liquored up and passing out, a ritual among his people.
Unconsciousness just wouldn't come though. Not even the huge joint protruding from his right nostril and rubbing against the visor of his space suit was helping.
He got a brilliant idea. "If I remove this suit, I can
can see the breathing of the universe. It was starting to kick in just one more brew and he could finally...
know the meaning of
embracing the Eternal Chicken.
Then the explosive decompression caused
him to warp to the land of our original heroes.
There he met Val Halen, The Viking God of Rock with his mighty Axe.
The 40-story tall Van Halen leaned over and gave him
piss enema.
When Thock woke up he laying in a puddle of his own puke. His bones ached. He looked at the landscape of empty bottles. That's right last night was the festival celebrating the Eternal Chicken. "Maybe I should call in sick to work," Thock thought.
But the Viking God of Rock was still there, wielding his axe with deafening power. The sound was too powerful for Thock's eardrums, and he passed out again. He
woke up again, since it was a dream inside a dream. He looked around and noticed that
the Viking God of Rock was still there, wielding his axe with deafening power.
"Who am I" he though. That would be helpful for the readers too.
Thock thought hard:
At this exact moment, Time paradoxed, and Snake came to the scene, walking in a cardboard box. He folded carefully his box, then approched the Viking God of Rock, Van Halen, and said:
"Lettuce, tomato, special sauce, all on a seseme seed bun."
Val Halen rasied his Might Axe and smote Snake leaving a smoldering pile of ash. With a thunderous voice Val Halen Spoke; "You forgot the pickles."
"...the pickles!" echoed Thock. "That's it! That's the meaning of
the Eternal Chicken", he said, finally understanding what was going on. The Eternal Chicken was actually the guardian of the Pickles, and he knew that to appease the Viking God of Rock, he had to pray the Eternal Chicken to give pickles to the Viking God of Rock.
To get his prayer heard,
he had to climb the highest mountian and peform the dance of the corn. For the ritual he needed to bring...
BFG9000 and
a salad fork
, both items which could be bought from the convenience store nearby. Unfortunately, he had no money with him, so
he attempted to loot Snake's corpse, but
he couldn't. It was too disgusting for him. So he decided to pull the required items out of his ass.
But instead of the required items, out came He-Man, a bodybuilder almost a trillion years old.
He tried robbing him instead, but
He-Man put an end to his virginity.
Feeling liberated, Thock turned against the chicken. With He-Man by his side, he
put an end to the chicken's virginity.
The thread was getting really disgusting and senseless when suddenly
the chicken put an end to He-Man's virginity.
While the Viking God of Rock sucked suggestively his Mighty Axe.
This axe, of course, was almost as large as Albright's massive tool.