Simple question
kay this is the question that is very debated with no clear answer what is the limit in age difference between a guy or girl for it to be morally right/wrong like we know the extreme were 40year old + 20 year old is well usually not that well but the cloudy area is what I wanna know say
you're 18 is +/- 2-3 years ok? like 15/16ish?
or
19 is +/- 3 years ok? like dating a 16 year old?
some people before were like if you are
14 the oldest is 16
15 the oldest you should date is 18
16 is 19
17 max 20ish
and 18 + anyone older is fair game?
I'm 18 at the moment is dating a 15 year old wrong? we are both about to turn 19/16
Who cares if it's morally wrong?
If you truly have feelings for a girl, I say go for it unless they're extremely young, say, 4.
People say that anybody in his 20 ies (and more) who love little girl is sick. Well ... i don't understand why...
maybe because of the christian values....
religious people are not always right. (ex : gay people, they are now more and less accepted)
maybe because you can see in the papers a lot of children molesting cases. (in 80/100 of these cases, the offenders are relatives and are not REAL lolikon people)
Same thing about the abductions of children, in most cases, the offender is not a REAL LOLIKON but a sick guy who can't get a girlfriend and try everything to get one even if he have to abduct her and confine her...
I agree. Why there is such a boundary between people loving "adult" and those loving "children or teenager"....
i'm attracted by children but from time to time i see girls in their 20 ies very beautiful and i can fall in love for one...
i agree ^_^
You know you want to fuck children, you say it's not about sex but you know where your romantical emotions turn to is where eventually your dicks will end up, be that my 10 year old sister or a block of concrete sidewalk.
It's not about christian values, it's about common sense and morality, interestingly sexual deviations only appear where culture gets detached from a natural and down to earth way of life, it's a damage in the human races natural way of thought, which is under the sway of her way of life. These sexual issues are just one of many negative side-effects caused by our modern society. Anotherone is the alienation of many of the possible psychic profiles that humans may have. As society get's more complex and specialised, more people can't handle it because their mentality is not suited to deal with the confines it serves. So we get a lot of mental conditions like ADD, Autism, Aspergers etc, these are judged as mental illnesses as they hinders persons functionality, but thats not what they are, it's just a natural proneness this individual carries to percieve and react to certain situations in a certain way.
The same thing goes for alcoholism and homosexuality, as for examples. What mental profile these conditions are stored in is not actually defect, it's the society into which they are born that is defect because it serves them with things that the human psyche is not meant to deal with.
Well as for the topic, it's all a matter about cultural heritage. It should be a matter about natural instinct but it's a matter of cultural heritage, and cultures have always been more or less fucked up, especially so in our case. It's the most fucked up thing we as humans have ever dealt with, our modern culture. Off topic, yes, sounds like secterist bullshit, whatever.
>>39
Living like monkeys may prevent pedophilia but going back to that is just retarded.
I am 24 and was together with a 16 year old some month ago. Wasn't much fun though and ended after like two weeks. Now I'm back to the policy I had before: 20 and older is fine, younger girls are really children after all. Or at least there's a difference in life settings that makes it hard to find things to talk about.
But well, if I fall in love with a 19 year old, there's not much I could do about it, is there?
Well there are practical complications at this point which makes it impossible, there's no return now. Not that I'm saying we should live like monkeys.
If you fall in love with someone who doesn't suit, the solution is quite simple, free yourself of the emotions. It's not hard and works in a flash if you are determined to do it, if not it is indeed impossible, but if a human can't control his feelings to do the right thing he is.... a woman?
Well my point is lack of self-control is a desease which is destroying our society. When people put emotions before reason, it only ends badly.
What is it about little girls that attract you?
like their immature childish? their innocence of not knowing better? what? just wondering =D
how cute they are.
A 21 year old man "dating" a 14 year old girl is wrong because the girl has no idea what she's doing. The man is taking advantage of her immaturity regardless of the circumstances. Kids that young simply can't have an adult relationship. They're too stupid, to put it bluntly. I've never seen a girl 16 and under that's dating a guy 18+ and thought it looked like a healthy, fuctioning relationship. Everything about it is wrong!
OK thanks for your opinion lol, even though i don't agree at all ^^
>>I've never seen a girl 16 and under that's dating a guy 18+
it's normal, it's illegal. so there are 2 solutions :
I think there is a difference between:
The age gap if you both really love each other for who they are, and you aren't loving them just for the fact they are younger and the attributes that come with it. The younger memeber must also realize fully the responsibility of a relationship.
vs
A person who just loves the idea dating of a young kid for the way they look and act (the whole innocence thing) and taking advantage of the fact that a person at that age does not know any better; since they are not mature enough.
I actually think they should be off limit till they fully understand the rights and wrong, and know what they are getting themselves into. If you plan to date someone much younger than you, you have the responsibility of informing them that and making them decide that is assuming they are old enough to decide.
>>and 18 + anyone older is fair game?
I recently turned 17 and im with a 15 year old, who'll be 16 in 2 months.
So this time next year it will be wrong for me to be with her because i'll be 18 and she'll be 16? :/
>>46 Finish reading the sentence. I've SEEN old guys dating 13-15 year old girls, but it didn't look like ~true love~ if you know what I mean. I agree with >>47. And it's simply a fact that girls that young aren't mature or experienced enough to understand what they're getting into. Even if the guy really thinks he loves her, he is still taking advantage of her in that way.
>>48
what I said was
----
some people before were like if you are
14 the oldest is 16
15 the oldest you should date is 18
"16 is 19"
17 max 20ish
and 18 + anyone older is fair game?
----
so no and I was asking that as a general guideline that was my topic question actually what do you guys think the age limit should be as there are some that are obivously wrong and other are sorta hard to say.
So much of this thread is about whether it's "okay" for an eighteen-year-old to bonk a seventeen-year-old or what have you… There are other considerations when entering a relationship with a younger partner besides just legality or "okay"-ness.
I'm twenty-four years old, a world-weary college graduate. A few months ago I was in a brief relationship with a nineteen-year-old girl who was ending her first year of junior college. It was fun, but it probably was just doomed from the start; she seemed to lack a certain mental maturity that I would want to see in a long-term partner, a sort of awareness that I suppose one gets from having to work one's way through college and then work full-time at a cutthroat job. She sometimes seemed surprisingly ignorant about the world outside her home, her car and the mall.
So, was it "okay" for us to date? From a legal standpoint, sure (although the relationship did not progress far enough for it to become sexual anyway). But given the experience, I don't think I can say I'd want to date any more girls that young anyway. They're still too… Is naïve the word?
I don't think it's ZOMG moraliry wrong to date and fuck someone younger, even 19/16 couples. It's just that in the teen period, I mean from 15-18, every year counts. You know, you (hopefully) make major leaps to maturity with every year in those couple of years. It's not really THAT noticable after 18, though, so it is not a thing to consider after that. There are undeniably mature persons with 15 and undeniably stupid and immature ones even still with 23, it's just that, as a rule, the younger someone is from the 18-year point, the immaturer they are. If I think someone is mature enough with 15 or whatever, hey, why not?
I'm a 19-year old guy, and I was seeing a 27-year old woman for a while. She was asian, so she was shorter than me and looked young, around my age, so I guess it wasn't that big of a deal. We didn't see anything wrong with it ourselves. But after everything was said and done it did leave a bad feeling in my mouth. I don't know why...but we had such different life experiences. It was hard to communicate, I thought. But I'm not blaming that on age. It's probably just because of how different our upbringings were.
>It's not really THAT noticable after 18, though, so it is not a thing to consider after that.
I don't think you can define such a hard-and-fast age at which you stop mentally maturing, though. I know that I was a much different person at 20 than I was at 18, and that I'm a much different person now than I was at 20. Maybe in another two or four years, I'll be a different person again. Maybe it never ends.
>>54
See, that's what I'm talking about. You cannot set some universal rules on when the age difference is too big - it's up for the 2 people who like each other to decide, not for yourself. The thing is just with teens, there really SHOULD be a limit because, as already said, most of them are immature, and it doesn't have to stop with 18, but it mostly, kind of, somehow does stop a bit at 18.
And I'm saying that, if I'm an average person (which I like to think I am), eighteen is still too early.
Incidentally, how old are you?
>eighteen is still too early.
...to be considered done maturing. (To finish my thought.)
n/2+7 for minimum age
ex. 1
17 and 14
17/2 = 8.5
8.5 + 7 = 15.5
NG!
ex. 2
18 and 16
18/2 = 9
9+7 = 16
OK!
ex. 3
16 and 14
16/2 = 8
8+7 = 15
NG!
Of course, there are exceptions, and the formula becomes pretty unreliable when you get to either extreme end of the age spectrum. Either way, it's a good rule of thumb.
21/2+7 =
17.5!
I have some rules about ages:
Never too old to be your mother and too young to be your daughter.
I set that limit to be 10 years.
10 years younger < ME < 10 years older
Now,
If you're underage (<18 of age) 12 and up is fine.
If you're adult (=>18), then nothing under 15. It's way too much trouble.
>>60 If you're underage (<18 of age) 12 and up is fine.
If you're adult (=>18), then nothing under 15. It's way too much trouble.
17 and 12 doesn't work. 25 and 15 doesn't work. Your rules are sub-par!
i going to be 22 this year. my last gf is 15. worked fine :D
errr
Is 19 and 16 okay?
(currently 18 and 15)
>>63
19/2=9.5
9.5 + 7 = 16.5
New rule: decimals can be rounded down.
Which means 19-16 is okay and 18-15 isn't. But whatever!
So in conclusion: rules are dumb and only for insecure fucks. Do what you gotta do, just use your goddamn brain once and everything will be ok
To >>61
You forgot mentioning 12 and 22.
I totally agree with >>65. They are my own guidelines where things are most likely to work (and add a little of ethics). You could think 17 and 12 could never work... or 25 and 15. or 12 and 22. I dunno since I'm older now. Just use your brain, and measure up the situation... sometimes the situation allows for such large discrepancies; most of the times it doesn't. >>65 sums up my conclusion as well.
And as >>62 does, he's 22 and gf is 15. Works I s'pose.
Here's the thing about the difference in age... It's okay to date someone who's older/younger than you by ten years. But what's most troublesome is that the young person have not gone through things most older person had gone through... For example... If you're 22 and he/she is 10 and up older than you then that person has passed through everything you are going through (I'm only talkin' about lifestyle) and it become very old for that person (even though some don't want to admit it). Some older people are much more mature than the young one and it may cause a slight problem. Some young adults like myself are still dependable with their parents because they go to college to get a career or that they didn't learn how to take care of themselves. Also they tend to die of old age first than the young one unless by some cruel faith the young one dies which ever comes first. Do you remember what Anna Nichole did when she got involved with a old geezer? She had a relationship with him and in the end he died and left a hefty large sum of money to her...
... On second thought. Having a relationship with an old geezer who's filty rich isn't such a bad idea. lol
>>66
Well, yeah, that goes without saying.
I just find the discussion of age-boundaries amusing. And n/2+7 is pretty reliable.
>>23
If they're that young(13), should they really be having sex? I know that many are, but a 13 year old is simply not emotionally mature enough to have that kind of a relationship.
Our society is telling children to do such things - this is the real problem
>>33
Because they are "pure", and many older women many not be.
When I first started dating my girlfriend she was 16 and I was 17, but I look around 3 years older than I am, and she about 2 years younger than she is (although she is mature.) Thus, it looked like 14 and 20...
I'm now in college and she's in high school; it looks even worse (because she practically hasn't aged!)
Just think about your self at the age 16.
I was easy to fool at that age and sometimes i did things that i shouldn't have done.
i think 17 is really the limmit for any one between 19-25
depends how mature she is.
any thing under 15 is pure immoral.
When you are above the age of 20 there is a rule that my cousin and I follow... Take your age, cut in half, then add seven, and that is the youngest age you can be with. It works out well.
and what is the equation for just how old you will date? lol
I guess it would be the same but the other way around. so the max age for me would be 40 i guess.
40+can still be pretty hot ya know! don't dis it till ya try it!
>>73
we already said that
you did? where?
ya, you see im retarded some times and dont read the post before mine and I just start typing, sorry bout that. you can call me names if you like.
ya, you see im retarded some times and dont read the post before mine and I just start typing, sorry bout that. you can call me names if you like.
really if two people like each other enough - age is not a problem. teenagers should date teenagers tho -imho - just because they would have more in common
I think that it is like gay people. Love isnt about gender, it's about the two people. i feel that this is the same thing.
I say this, but still if i saw a 59 year old guy and a 15 year old girl making out i'd be a little more than weirded out >.<
im 19 and im with a 16 year old. As long as the younger is above the age of concent there is nothing wrong. if she was 15 then it wud not only be wrong but illegal
it seems more acceptable if the man is older than the woman-even 10-20 years older. But I think men in general are "turned off" to dating women who are older than they are. "Older" women have a higher libido than young women and guys don't know what they are missing - if they pass on a woman just cuz the numbers aren't right. I am not talking bout gray haired grannies here - lol.
I'm 19 and dating a 16 year-old. He's very intelligent and witty, but there's this huge gap between us in maturity. I mean, he's great on a lot of levels, but I doubt I'd date anyone else his age. Sometimes it's just a matter of personality rather than age.
I'm a 22 year old woman dating at 18 year old.
I love it. Y_Y