I was in sociology a few days ago when a girl sitting ahead of me began running her fingers through her hair. This habit has always fascinated me because of how raw and beautiful it is. She then carried it to her right shoulder and turned her head to face back at me.
She looked directly at me, and I her, and then she promptly turned around.
Immediately after class she hopped up, and as I was pulling a large hunk of bread from my schoolbag, she asked me for yesterday's notes. I considered how shitty and illegible my notes were, and how I didn't even know if I had them, so I paused, reached for my notebook, and then said "oh, he puts the notes online." She, quickly responding: "Really?" I said yes, basically. Then she mumbled 3 lines and I nodded 3 times and she went away. I had looked into my bag the whole time, so it took me a few moments to realize it had been the same girl, and that she had probably been flirting with me in some way, so I held in my grin and ran the fuck out of the room.
Today, she passed by me in the hall twice as we waited for the professor. I did not perceive an overt eye contact on her part, and I am wary of forcing eye contact due to past experience.
Now, it has not yet passed a week and I fear that if I do not act soon she will lose interest in my potential viability or I will lose faith in her ever even having looked at me, much less flirted with me. This ‘same’ instance occurred two semesters ago, and the games went on for months before I tried to accost the girl in the hall, only for her to run to her car and then drop the class several weeks later.
There is absolutely no concrete way of knowing whether she was flirting or merely needed the notes, and even if I did know for sure I have no idea of how I could approach her. I beg of you, 4-ch, guide me through this. I will forfeit everything I have for this girl.
We know as little as you. Hell, even the girls here don't know about their kind.
Things like that have happened to me on many occasions.
Agreed, she has not done enough to communicate her interests. I suggest getting to know her a little better first before making any judgments.
your stats please.
You need to find out what kind of personality she is. If she's the bookish type, you'll have to set your schedule around going to the library so you can build up your INT stat. From your story, she sounds more like the kind that is interested in fashion and the latest trends, which means you'll have to schedule in time to work points into your APPEARANCE and GEN. KNOWLEDGE stats.
Girls are really pretty easy to win. You just have to keep fro mspreading yourself too broadly, unless the girl you're pursuing happens to be one of those all-around types. Good luck.
Hey just try talking to her and see where things go from there
Yeah, but he won't be able to initiate any more encounters with her unless he works on his stats more, so it's not quite that easy.
>> I will forfeit everything for this girl..
wth.. you didn't even say you had liked her before this questionable "incident".
>>4
STR:1 AGI:7 CHA:0 (sometimes I find a +10 charisma item in the atmosphere and use it, but the effects last for only about 30 seconds) INT: 8 DEF: 10
>>6
>>7
I came here to find out exactly how to do that. I don't miss class, I can't use the notes thing. I have no means of approaching her at all. I need a pretense so that I can blame it if all else fails.
>>8
That's fine. She could have been anyone, but she happens to be immensely beautiful and has a certain degree of low self esteem, so I really will do anything to capture this perfect incident. I only get like 5 chances per semester, and I blow them all just like this one.
I was thinking last night of how obvious her attempt was, and the fact that this is all my fault, so it probably is my duty to approach her. But still, I've learned a lot of lessons, and they all say to never make any aggessive attempts at knowing someone.
omg pure def noob.
>>9
Okay, so basically you fall for any girl who just so much as gives you a second glance?
If you want a pretense, then start from something small, like borrowing her liquid paper. Then depending on your relationship with her (how long you've been classmates with her) strike up a conversation regarding something that she owns. For example, if she's listening to music, pretend that you're bored and ask her what she's listening to (that will give you some indication of compatibility). Or (if you're really stuck), make mention to the weather. But that's kind of an overdone icebreaker, and she might be sassy enough to pick up on what you're doing.
Of course, making small talk with her will be much easier if you've just met her. It would've been even easier if you'd just lent her your notes..
>>But that's kind of an overdone icebreaker, and she might be sassy enough to pick up on what you're doing.
But if she's sassy enough to pick up on it, and to also flirt with OP, then she should be sassy enough to be OK with it and use overdone line to continue flirtation.
But hey, that's just me.
>>1
Christ, OP. Just fucking talking to her. Like, Hey, what's up? I'm Anonymous, you have pretty hair, do you like thai food? This class is bullshit.
Just say something to her.
and no more acosting...that's pretty weird.
>>Okay, so basically you fall for any girl who just so much as gives you a second glance?
I don’t believe in ‘matchmaking’ and ‘finding someone.’ Who you eventually come to stay with for the rest of your life will be little different than the girl you dated for a few days in 4th grade. One makes their partner, and comes to love who that is. I think it’s naïve to believe you’ll ever find someone truly ‘compatible’: the best you’ll ever get is someone a little bit so.
>>liquid paper
And what if she has none? What, after that? I give it back to her and it promptly ends. The girl from 2 semesters ago threw her compact to the floor and I picked it up. I handed it to her and she thanked me and ran away.
>>something that she owns, music, weather
These are all disgusting and rude false interests to raise, in my opinion. I wouldn’t want such a lowly and systematic thing to be our first real conversation.
>>It would've been even easier if you'd just lent her your notes.
I think so, too.
>>Just say something to her.
That was my plan. But I’ve thought of her for a week now, and this becomes less simple on each passing day. It is likely that when Monday morning rolls around I’ll find something in her gesture and expression to disagree with my past findings, and I’ll dust the mission.
>>and no more accosting...that's pretty weird.
This is why I am so zealously hesitant to speak to her. If she runs out of the room like the last girl I tried to accost then I’ll probably swear to never think of another girl again under a circumstance like this. This entire thread has probably done more to dissuade me than any negative thoughts I have come up on my own. Your words and advice will flash through my mind as I speak to her and it will impair my ability to speak capriciously. Though, I admit, I do not regret the timeless and unforgettable humor of stat analysis.
I think I’ll talk to her, though, somehow. Last girl I tried to no words could come out of my mouth as I looked at her, and I could only respond chokingly once she had asked me what it was I wanted, and after that.. Well, it was a swift descent into hell. I’ll probably ask her if she had been posing me a pretense on Thursday and I’ll laugh in her face. Thanks.
This thread is a little bewildering. I like it, though.
Oh my god.
Dude, you sound like a real creep that's your problem right there.
"I will forfeit everything I have for this girl".
Dude, you don't even know her. She could be a communist or a hippie for all you know.
And this "Accost" spiel. What the hell? You don't accost a girl.
Is it so goddamned hard for you just to strike up some form of conversation with her?
Jesus man, you have a dick and balls. ACT LIKE IT!
The worst she can do is call you an asshole and ignore you.
Then you just move on. Please don't fixate or obsess on this one girl who you don't even know, really.
First of all, I'm going to come out and say it. You're a real fucking creep. You're a son of a bitch and your mother fucks for dollars on the street corner, servicing mostly blacks and hispanics. Usually going so far to give them a discount. You have chronic dandruff, you're breath smells bad, and I shudder at the prospect that you may one day pollute the earth with your inferior seed. If I had a daughter, and you were to come to my house wishing to date her, I'd have a fucking shotgun ready to blow your ass away. No Jury in the WORLD would convict me, and I'd probably get a Medal and a Hero's parade for doing the job no one else had the time or interest to do.
Now that THAT is out of the way, your warrior training is complete. you're an asshole and a putz. Now get your goddamn ass out of your goddamn chair next time you go to your goddamn class and actually TALK to the girl. Don't interrogate her, don't drone on, and for the love of fuck don't try to impress her with your nerd bullshit. The secret is to let HER do ALL the fucking talking. Once she does this you will win her trust and find out if you even really like her or if she is a bitch.
What the hell is wrong with you people these days? You act like you're going to marry her on the third date. Let's work on getting that first one, OK? And if she says no then she's a bitch and you move on.
This isn't rocket science you know.
>>13
This explains why you're having so much trouble. You stress way too much about what would go wrong. Considering that you don't believe in matchmaking and the like, I don't see how you would be hard hit if she said "no". Afterall, you said so yourself, you have around 5 "chances" a semester...which is alot?
How is music a false interest? The points I just mentioned are for small talk. It's what you usually do when you get to know someone and make them feel comfortable about your presence. Music, borrowing liquid paper, talking about the weather are examples. You just find a way that would suit your situation and character. Don't expect a deep and meaningful convo as your first.
Pushher up against a wall and put your man penis in her woman vagina
>>Please don't fixate or obsess on this one girl who you don't even know, really.
I don't know if I clarified this fact in my first post, but I have no one. My success with her will radically change the outcome of my life and the decisions I make for decades to come. I don't understand how anyone could be expected to not feel unsure in my situation.
>>16
But the other 4 chances may be even more vague, and even more unlikely. I am rather sure of this girl. She looks honest, and she dresses conservatively. I can't ask for much more than that.
I think I'll stay away from concrete discussion. I want to address our past interactions and their meaning rather than begin some new ones, otherwise we'll just get trapped in a sick cycle of weekly pretense and hinting until the semester ends.
>>17
For me it is. I expend a huge amount of energy each day to respond and act normally. I analyze almost everything which is relevant to myself, and then analyze the things relevant to that. I have been expecting and preparing for Tuesday (not Mon.) morning since before puberty.
Just because I'm given the oppurtunities doesn't mean I can handle them. I've almost found my charm more hurtful than anything else, because it sets me up for the attentions of girls that I can't act on correctly. It nearly happens every day, but I can't do anything about it, because I might be insane, and it might all be extrapolation. I'm not a fucking machine, I'm a human being. I'm going to ask her whether she still wants my notes, and say that I may have seemed evasive and then question whether it was all a pretense, and I'll probably babble and freeze and hope to work my audience for words.
I cannot decide whether to shave or not, though. I was unshaven when this all happened Thursday, and shaving may have her think that I care too much about the event and she'll have the upper hand, and she may not even like me shaven. She is South Asian, but I really know nothing about that area and its romantic culture. I don't mean to beg you guys point for point, but, even if I have disregarded most advice it has helped me a lot in my resolve to talk to her..
i really don't think she'll care if you shaved or not...
>>20
True, I don't think she assesses the situation as much as you seem to do. If it's not too long since she asked for your notes, I think it would be a good idea if you went up and asked her if she still needed them. If she says yes, then great (don't stuff it up). If she says no, then just say "that's good, cos last time you asked, my notes were really messy..queue small talk"
It is done, I guess.
I wrote "I'm sorry if I've perturbed you. I was looking a your hair, it was distractingly beautiful." I feel like a liar already. I probably should have never posted any of this. It will be the death of our unborn relationship.
I handed it to her after class, after having tried to remove an ant from my arm for 30 minutes. At that point, I hardly cared what her reaction was, I just wanted the ant off. I said "here's the notes," she looked surprised, so I explained that perhaps he might have written some things on the board that the powerpoint didn't have.
Then I walked to the water fountain to pour water on my arm to get the ant off, and I saw a huge water beetle in the first fountain, so I moved to the second. The ant still would not come off, and I had water all over my arm and pants. She came up and got a drink, and the splash from her emission scared the bug and it flew into her face. Then she perked her brow and smiled, and I sort of shrugged my entire body, so she proceded to the bathroom, holding the letter folded inward so that she should have seen my note on the back, and I ran away.
No, this was not a nightmare. I'll keep you updated. I can probably ruin it from here on my own, thanks everyone.
what a freak
before you do things, ask yourself "is this creepy?"
I only read the first post. Instead of replying with stupid eye contact, why don't you TRY AND ASK HER OUT ON A DATE. I hate to repeat myself dammit.
FIRST give her a compliment, such as I had never noticed how appealing your eyes are. Would you like to go out on a date? HECK you can even compliment her on how she runs her fingers through her hair!
I just read >>22. Oh God. Please. How corny. I know I'm in a bad mood but I will have to repeat myself. AND THIS GOES TO ALL MEN IN THIS BOARD!
<You are supposed to be trying to attract her, not make her feel uncomfortable. The one who has to put up with the uncomfortable position of asking a girl out and facing possible humilliation is YOU.>
DID I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR, MEN IN /love/?????? STOP BEING WIMPS AND PRACTICE!
bumping because i just have to know: how in the fuck does it take 30 minutes to get an ant off your arm?!
After reading >>22 I now seriously doubt OP's competency and judgement more than ever. Are you trying to troll your own thread?
>>28
I was going to go into more detail, but it seemed really irrelevant outside of the effect it had on my approaching her. The ant may have either killed or spawned a cementation between us.
What happened was it dropped from the ceiling the hair of my arm. It started to crawl, but it got stuck. I was going to push it off and let it onto the floor when it tangled itself within the fine auburn hairs of my arm. It seems it was one of those small reddish ants that have furry, spiked legs so that they can climb just about anything they like. The trouble was, its legs were sticking to my hairs and it was pretty much being shish-kabobbed on fifteen 1-inch hairs. So I pushed it along and it kept getting stuck and I probably ended up crushing half its body. I try not to kill insects, and there was no reason for him to be smashed by my arm while I was writing. I eventually got him off once class was over. I used a piece of thick grass to sort of pry him off, but I still had about 7 minutes of trouble.
I don't see what everyone is so upset with me about. I just don't like taking life, and the ant wouldn't get off. How is that my fault? I have class with her tomorrow. I forsee progressively nightmarish updates, guys.. But then again, can it get any worse? I hope I have some good news for you.
ugh you're so creepy.
just...gtfo. seriously.
Take it with humor. Don't put a long face. Face her straightforwardly and in an assertive way. Be cool, be humorous, be nice. You will remember stupid things like that with a smile in your face. So try to make the best out of your time with her with the best of attitudes. You DON'T want to look back and regret your boring emo life. Don't be a wimp, a sissy, or an emo. Please.
I posted >>15
and even I cannot help this man.
Oh god, even I couldn't fail as hard as you, >>1
But there's one thing you shall remember, "there's plenty of fish in the sea"
Don't let this humiliation ruin you, think of it like this way: It can't be any worse than this ;) .
>>34
I think he sets himself up for failure.
Seriously, what kind of prank are you trying to pull? There is some decent advice here and yet you go on some wacky tangent to find the best way to scare away the girl.
I just had a thought:
>>The girl from 2 semesters ago threw her compact to the floor and I picked it up. I handed it to her and she thanked me and ran away.
I think I understand why..
Anyway, as much as I seem to flame you, don't give up hope.
I gave her the note because I didn't want to bother talking to her and wasting her time. It wouldn't have made a difference. I understand how gravity and ledges work. She's on the ledge or she's not. I can't change that.
She'll either talk to me now or she'll ignore it. In either case I don't even care. I don't even want her anymore. She smiled at me this morning, but it was more like a laughter as I see it. I would have smiled in her place, too.
>>35
But you're right, I do set myself up for failure. I can see the specific things I've done in situations like this where I would disarm pretenses exactly as I did with the notes and then blame her for not addressing me correctly. In all honesty, I don't even want a girlfriend, because the only ideal girl I would accept would be such a lowly human being they wouldn't even be worth loving.
>>"there's plenty of fish in the sea"
All the fish are the same in the same ways. I'm not going to mate a shark or a turtle, man.
>>Be cool, be humorous, be nice
That's exactly how I act towards girls I have no respect for. My problem is the second I respect someone I'm unable to treat them in any other way but as my superior, and this means not talking to them unless they talk to me first.
I have a new question, but should I start a new thread? How do I stop this girl I gave a note to from having a crush on me?
/Seen upon entry into library
/Seen to right upon exit from bathroom, obviously awaiting me
S:Hi
H:Hi
S:We have class today, right?
/Ascent of steps
S:Thanks for the notes.
H:Sure
/I smile, down the steps at her sinisterly
/I go up the steps, leaving her
S:/under breath/ You’re incredible. / I’m wearing heels wait
/I wait at the top, insistent
/She opens the door for me out
H:Thanks
S:You’re welcome
/We talk together, I slightly ahead of her, trying to keep pace while trying to increase hers
/Nearing building
S:It’s cold today.
/Long silence, I look at her arm, goose-fleshed
S:What?
H:Nothing. ..It would be.
/Entry, thanking, welcoming, fumbling, walking to class
S:This is the room?
H:Yes, I think so.
S:I don’t think this is it, are you sure?
H:I don’t know, I just kind of guess and go in. Maybe I’m wrong.
S:I thought you asked if the professor was here. Forget it.
H:Oh.
S:Shall we go in, then?
H:Yes.
/Entry
/I sit 2 seats to her left after she sits, taking my usual spot. I figured if she wanted to sit close she would know where I’d be.
/20 minutes of class
/I turn to my right to the class, and look at her
/She smiles at me and flares her eyebrows twice in that queerly perverse Indian fashion
/I turn away and laugh to myself, while writing the ordeal down as it occurs
/Posted
Is anyone familiar with that Indian brow-lift? That creeped me the fuck out and sickened me.. Since you’ve all been so helpful I feel obligated to inform you of developments. That’s all for today.
Ok, now wtf. Just tell her you like her and ask her out to do something, anything, (sex) together.
Ravage her like no man has ever ravaged her before. Then have sex with her.
I'm single, and like you have no record when it comes to women, but come on man, freaking out about a stupid ant?! Get your fucking act together and go on the attack! hope this helps.
>>36 Stop assuming girls are treating you with ill intentions for small things. Women are not like men. Women eat and breathe relationships. There is nothing, no reason for you to assume ill intentions from her part, and even is it were so, women can still have sex with guys they hold ill intentions toward. (It's a guilty pleasure.)
Relationships do not follow you around. You follow relationships. A person that awaits for others to talk to them first before you talk to them has not matured socially (meaning you're like a little kid expecting to be treated well by others before approaching them).
If you do not want a relationship with the girl, but do not want to affect her or make her think ill of you, you would sensibly reply "I kindly appreciate, but I am not interested, thank you for you offer," etc. when she ask you on a date. If she asks you a favor, tell her, "I can't help you, I'm sorry." This is how socially mature people handle relationships.
Typo: "when she askS you on a date"
Hello. A small update.
She missed 2 days of classes, so I assumed she had cut and ran after I treated her coldly on our walk to class.
She did not.
She came into class and I made note and finished copying the rest of the notes and then ripped the other note out for her. I walked out of class and she stood waiting against the wall. I handed them to her and she spoke like a highschool boy and said I was the best and thanked me. I responded with a curt welcome.
We walked out the building together as she told me a story about how she saw someone with my color hair and said "Yo <My Name>!" and when they turned around she saw it wasn't me. We opened the door for eachother clumsily and I said it must have been really embarrassing. I thought of mentioning the fact that I had brown hair like about 50% of the school but I swallowed it.
We walked out and she asked if I had class. I paused in thought and decided that beginning our relationship on poor scholarly ethic by cutting a class was a poor thing to do. I also noted, of course, that today we were watching a shitty play on video today. I said yiss and we parted with some goodbye.
I laughed like a lunatic as I walked to class at my horrendous and irreparable folly and how shitty I must have made her feel through my second rejection of her pretense. Poor girl.
ouch man, either your just some guy with too much free time on your hand or you got a real problem.
stop trying to "calculate" everything so they get "right" and instead, for FUCK'S SAKE, start changing your self instead. be a little bit positive about your self, and stop thinking for people, shit, they think what they think, you can't just assume what people think with over analyzing their reactions.
oh and stop swalloing your conversations,
I packed together ever so slowly so as not to be too fast for her and went out behind her. She accosted me at the corner and said do you want to see the boy I mentioned I took photos of him. She pulled out her cellphone and I looked over and she said no just a moment as if get yours eyes off my phone and I turned my head but saw a picture of her with her arm around another boy of her race as her background. My mind sank a bit. She showed me and I said yes, that did look like me. He had terrible posture bent over a desk and a big shaggy head and a curved grey sweatshirt, just like mine. I said that could have been me actually but she said she no, called to me and he didn't answer and I told her that when I became very "absorbed" I didn't hear anything at all and she said no I saw his face. We walked away and she said do you have class? I said no. She said she was going to the library to meet her brother and asked where I went. I said the library she "oh." We walked on and she talked about the coldness and her sickness and I said is that why you were out. She said yes. I hopped over the cemented corner and I heard a plop and walked on and she looked and went back and picked up my book. She turned it over, and handed it to me. I said oh - thanks, in the most offhand and careless and light way since I did not care, really, and she was obligated to do such things for me anyway because we were friends. And in any case I saw I them accusing me Idid it on purpose because I wanted her to see who I read. Salinger's Nine Stories. I envisioned giving it to her weeks back with For Esme bookmarked but just took it and held it. We went in and she said no, the right not the doors I'm going to go see some of my friends. I followed her and she walked ahead and we came to their table. Four black-eyed Indian boys looked up at me and I held the craziest face-encompassing grin I could. She realized I came with her and said no, no and something or other. I said oh, goodbye then see you and walked off.
It's absolutely over. Thanks for your help, everyone.
It's obvious that you get a kicked by the telling your stories and you know the indian chicked is interested in you adn you want to brag about it. You want to amuse yourself and us by pretending you apathethic in your action towards us yet i know you are thinking she is easy. Whys that? Because are white, you shouldn't be so quick to think that you are good or whatever you think she likes you for, but you got it easy simply because you are white. She likes you because you are white and nothing else, don't boost your esteem here. You did nothing to achieve a girl but only you are white, she go for you. You didn't have anything to offer her but your race. Understand that point, you did nothing. Don't think you are successful, you are not, you are benefitting simply because you are white, got it?
Ha ha what the hell? You sound severely jealous. I started this thread to ask for help and in return for that I provide developments. And even if I didn't return, I still thought it might be an interesting idea to set up a day-by-day account of a relationship from beginning to end for you all. I don't understand why you can't appreciate that.
I don't live in a fucking colony in the 1800s. This isn't Burma. There's a huge number of white males at my school, we're not a commodity item. She didn't accept me because I was white or because she is Indian. She accepted me because she's mildly overweight and short relative to other girls and I looked at her. Nice job racifiying the situation, though, because there's a huge class difference which neutralizes romance with interracial prostitution in New York, right?
Actually, funny thing, you've almost the English sentence structure of a native Hindi. Are we feeling a little racial tension agent apathy and dehumanisation of your beloved women?