I received no response, so midway through the week, I wrote on her wall again, asking if she figured out if she could go. Still no response, so last night, after some discussion with E, I decided to call her. Of course she didn't answer, and I didn't bother leaving a message. I considered calling her again the next day or the day of the show, but I didn't want to annoy her, so I didn't. I'm beginning to feel like I need a personal messenger to correspond with her. Nothing it seems is effective in reaching her other than face-to-face meetings. I'm also thinking she doesn't have a clue I'm into her. I asked E about calling her again, she has no idea. I'm completely lost. What the hell do I have to do to get to this girl?

I am not giving up though.

As far as the homefront, well, I've been forced to start paying off my loans or face default, so I've begun applying for jobs in the "service sector..." McJobs. In doing so, I feel like a complete and total, utter failure. Fine investment my college education was. It's around the holidays, so most likely any employment I do get will be seasonal, and I'll be back where I am in January, which doesn't do me a whole lot of good, just prolongs the inevitable. Default is inevitable without a steady job. A while ago, I found out my loans were sold to other banks, so I contacted one of the two banks, to see if I could work with them instead of Sallie Mae, but no luck. However, I did find out they consolidate private loans, so I applied and am awaiting approval. I private borrowers have next to NO RIGHTS. At least federal borrowers have some sort of protection. It's also a lot easier to consolidate federal loans and A LOT more companies out there do them.

We also still don't have hot water. I did some research and found protective coveralls for a decent price, so maybe I can actually do this myself, if I could just get off my ass and do something.