what the hell is wrong with me..? (looking for answers, not sympathy :p) (25)

1 Name: alanna~ : 2007-03-28 21:33 ID:mmH5QhxA

ok.. to introduce myself; yes i'm a girl. i'm 16 years old and i'm just a normal teen.
i don't think i'm really ugly, my real friends have said i'm pretty but at the highschool i go to.. most people there treat me like shit for some reason. i act confident, i don't really hide from people usually(because i have the "i don't give a shit what you think" attitude in school).
guys from other towns/places have even hit on me, and told me i was pretty. my mom's friend even said i should be in a pageant, but i think she was trying to be nice XD. its just like this in this highschool where i feel like this.
theres 1 main guy that does this, hes pretty "popular" in this school and hes in a few of my classes. hes one of those black(no, i'm not racist) "ghetto/gangster" guys and everyday he'd bother me for a dollar. being the nice person i am, i gave him a dollar one day. i never did it again(though he always asked) because i felt like this would be an everyday ritual and i FIGURED he would stop asking. ok.. a week after, he starts calling me "ugly" and if i'd see him in the halls.. he'd yell it out and his friends/followers would laugh. eventually, they began treating me like shit and saying i was ugly as well.
it's probably because of my attitude(sometimes i look or sound bitchy.. but i'm just irritated), but ive never really had a boyfriend, either.. i dont even know why.
alright, fastfoward to todayy. i do have a few friends in this school but i'm more of a loner-type person sometimes :P. people are STILL calling me ugly and for some reason.. it's really getting to me. most girls don't really like me either. i'd look in the mirror in every class and stare in there for like 10minutes straight.. making sure everything was ok and thinking of ways to improve myself. i`ve tried cutting back on that but i still feel so ugly. i've turned them out, they don't even know i'm affected by this, but idk.. i'm not "hurt".. but i'm just wondering; "Am I really that ugly?" or maybe dillusional to consider myself "okay or pretty-looking". i kinda feel like what i see in the mirror is not what other people see.
sorry for the lengthy post, but has anyone ever had a problem like this?

2 Name: Anonymous : 2007-03-28 22:52 ID:dSizI76U

this is just normal high school mob mentality. one "cool" person (the ghetto guy) makes a remark trying to impress his friends. in turn, they feel that they have to not only agree with what he says but act upon it, or else theyre worried they might get shunned from the popular group that they want to stay in. girls will then take this on, to try and get in with the boys. there really is nothing in it, you're not ugly its just the way that kids act. dont worry about it, you seem to get on well with people outside of your school so try and meet more people like that so you dont start to think the people at school are right. as for when theyll stop - well it could literally be a few days if some weirdo transfers to the school and is an obvious target for these kinda verbal games, or it might be a few years when the people have actually grown up and realised that actually that ghetto boy is an idiot. you never know, its perfectly possibly that in a few years you could be friends with some of these people, when they realise that they should make their own judgements of people and not just follow the crowd to fit in.

3 Name: Anonymous : 2007-03-28 23:07 ID:jForHXCg

you're not ugly. you're in high school. high school kids are immature and idiotic. i know how you feel. i remember all the dumb cliques and popularity contests. i'm in college now, and everyone has changed. we grew up, and "hey, you're ugly" isn't all that funny anymore. so dont worry. you're not ugly. i could show you all the "ugly" i've seen on the internet, but it would be better if you didn't see it.

4 Name: Anonymous : 2007-03-29 11:50 ID:RJt3raYy

You know, for all we know, she could be very ugly.

5 Name: Anonymous : 2007-03-29 12:08 ID:j5pgivwZ

>>2
>>3
What those two said.

Don't let this get too you, it means pretty much nothing - even if it sticks (Which it probably won't), you'd get nothing out of responding in any way. The guy probably didn't like how you looked, or your attitude, maybe you get better marks than him or whatever - and well, some people are just assholes. Don't bother dealing with him.

Unrelated: This is not a chat where you have to type fast, so please use capital letters where appropriate, especially with long posts like this - it will make your posts a lot easier to read.

6 Name: alanna~ : 2007-03-29 19:25 ID:mmH5QhxA

Thanks for the advice, I'm gonna try to ignore him from now on.
It sucks that I always see him though XD. Ah well, hes one of those potheads anyway.

Ok yeah, I'm sorry lol. I'm kind of new here, I'll remember to type like that.

Err.. well my myspace is myspace.com/xlostdream XD, if a picture of me could help explain my situation more idk, lol

7 Name: Anonymous : 2007-03-29 20:24 ID:nJixoNwb

>>6

You look fine. Sounds like the guy's just bitter because you wouldn't let him mooch.

8 Name: Anonymous : 2007-03-29 21:50 ID:OZj3NRVI

>>6 never post your pictures or myspace account links in *chans.
And about your looks, to put it in brutal honesty, i would say you look far from being "ugly", you look Ok. confidence-confidence-confidence, you deserve to have it

9 Name: Anonymous : 2007-03-29 22:45 ID:8n15AafS

>>8
4-ch is harmless-er in that regard than pretty much any other site I know. Well, besides that other forum which has like 5 active members, but that hardly counts.

10 Name: Anonymous : 2007-03-29 23:40 ID:Heaven

After looking at your myspace, I can't really say that you seem to have any insecurity about your looks. If you really thought you were ugly, then why the several cam-whore looking pictures of yourself? Methinks this is a thread is a sympathy thread. Everyone cops some flack once in a while, just learn to deal with it and not complain. You can't expect to be universally loved. It's not like you don't have friends either, so you're not exactly the wallflower that you make yourself out to be..

11 Name: alanna~ : 2007-03-30 00:09 ID:mmH5QhxA

@10

Alrighty, first of all I never said I thought I was ugly. I think i'm ok, I don't consider myself above anyone else either though.

I have friends, yes. I never said I didn't have any, however almost all of my friends do not attend my highschool and some are even from different towns.

Why would I look for sympathy on an online site? I don't really need any because, well.. sympathy is kind of pathetic in a situation like mine, I agree. I was looking for reasons, or possibly people who were in a similar situation. (:

At the highschool I go too, it's not really that big(compared to other highschools), about 500 kids altogether.
It's like I can get along with kids in different towns, but in this one school; it does seem like nobody really likes me.

I don't really go out too much on the weekdays(because of homework, work, etc.) and sometimes I prefer to be alone. Yes, I like to think. :P
I do go out on weekends if I can, but thats only 2 days. I see these people at school probably more than I see my real friends.

I mean if a group of kids called you "ugly" daily for months, wouldn't you at least begin to question their accusations? It really does begin to get to you after awhile.
I mean I do somewhat have confidence, but I'm not made of stone.

12 Name: Anonymous : 2007-03-30 15:08 ID:zkqG+awA

Perspective. The guy who asks you for money is not going to do well. People who are unpleasant at school do not, on the whole, have happy lives ever after. Focus on what you want to do in ten years time and ignore the noise. :)

13 Name: Anonymous : 2007-03-31 07:25 ID:XA5SqkJt

I didn't read the topic but whether you are ugly or not is irrelevant beyond high school. It then becomes a matter of preference and personal taste. In short: no one cares. And if they do, they really need to grow up.

14 Name: Anonymous : 2007-04-15 00:31 ID:6YYqG9y7

If you're still in high school then there's nothing wrong with you

The vast majority of highschool kids are failures, it isn't until college when most people start to realize this.

Don't worry about it, I'm sure you can find some half decent classmates to hang out with at school.

15 Name: Anonymous : 2007-04-15 05:49 ID:kmjErrz6

I have to be your friend to see your pictures?

Aww~ I missed out.

16 Name: Haiiro : 2007-04-15 16:06 ID:sexJzl4+

At the high school I go to, which only has about 140 students, the ambience is quite hostile. I am not focused on my looks (I seldom do, still), I am 100% concentrated on exams, schoolwork, etc. I don't think of myself as handsome (maybe cute, but not really -_-) although many have told me that I am smoking hot (O_o?) and many have tried to hit on me XD. I am quite confident, but I sometimes have this fear (almost everybody in the country I live in (Mexico) has this type of fear) of what people might think of me if I change. People always look at me as the common nerd with odd and reserved thoughts. But now I am more open.

I have this friend, a musician, who is always in contact with strange people during his concerts and stuff. He goes to the school I go to, only because of the great (maybe not too great, but sufficient) level of english. Whenever he is at school, he totally ignores everybody. He is either working like a normal student or talking to people like a musician, but he doesn't care what people think of him. And that makes him free and happy. I began to talk to him and attend some of his concerts and suddenly realized how he lives and thinks of people. As long as he is OK, everybody else can go to hell with his or her thoughts and emotions.

I started applying this lifestyle to my own and have become a more open person. I listen to many genres of music, I draw 4-komas of real persons to make fun of them, I start investigations and projects on my own. But I still respect and analyze what people think. Not too much of what people think of me, but I have become more tolerable. You could do that too alanna~.

17 Name: かやしゅ : 2007-04-27 09:11 ID:eRjRenwQ

Holy mother of all, you're cute, >>6 O_O

18 Name: Anonymous : 2007-04-27 14:46 ID:7it1Npyc

Don't worry about it, black people don't think when they do stupid things.

Just tell him to fuck off and if he doesn't you'll beat the shit out of him.

19 Name: Anonymous : 2007-04-27 23:20 ID:zQE9IssK

well.. you actually are ugly -_-

oh wait, you said you also have a shitty attitude. maybe you tought you could affort that. you know, pretty girls have shitty attitudes because they can get everywhere thanks to their bodies.
but if you are ugly then you'll have to get on the same boat as other humans and become a decent person if you want others to like you.

don't worry, most ugly girls realize that

20 Name: Anonymous : 2007-04-28 04:54 ID:OZj3NRVI

>>19 somehow its a blessing huh?
Its hard when you are growing up, and harder when you are grown up. But I like it here at the bottom of the hierarchy. Home is where you are born!

21 Name: Anonymous : 2007-04-29 07:36 ID:P3xI7BWf

Every high school has its' own micro-culture, within these microcultures things can get pretty rough. Even average to pretty people can become an object of mockery simple because they might not belong completely to that micro-culture. In HS I remember several girls who never quite shook off their stigma of being teased in elementary school, and simply became outcasted. They weren't bad looking, in fact they were quite alright, but a small seed of difference caused them a lot of grief.

Well either way, this is the result of your loner tendencies and a random bad occurance that compounded your problem. Of course it's easy to call the loner girl names, that's just how it is. None of this has to be true in the real world, but in your microcosm it matters a lot. It's kind of like a snowball effect. You're probably not ugly, and you're not wrong for not getting along with the majority. That's life, you were just put in a place that you don't really belong in. Thankfully/regrettably high school lasts 4 years. If you can survive it and let all the nonsense roll off your back, then you can look back and realize how little most of your troubles really were.

High School is either the best or worst experience you'll have in your lifetime; it just matters how much you let it all get to you.

22 Name: of the female species : 2007-05-01 22:45 ID:e1WKUGHT

Boo fucking hoo. If you have the attitude of 'not caring what others think', why are you posting your journal-like story on here. I really don't think you care if others are in this situation. Every girl experiences something like this in their lives, (Guys too, probably.) why don't you discuss it with your friends and get opinions there? Surely 4-ch doesn't know, for we do not go to your highschool or are familiar with this wannabe gangster. Forget about it and continue to be happy with your life. Sympathy is made of do not want [to give.]

23 Name: Anonymous : 2007-05-18 07:01 ID:xyCIIOQn

You're pretty!

As for letting this asswad get to you, he's shown what a high-quality specimen of manhood he is by treating you like this. Idiots don't matter, hun. Oh, and "of the female species?" Fuck off and start treating people like humans. This is not /b/.

24 Name: Anonymous : 2007-05-18 09:57 ID:cYPiNemY

>>23, stop feeding cam/attentionwhores or this place really will turn into /b/. OP is a hypocrite right from the very start.
First post she says:

>i`ve tried cutting back on that but i still feel so ugly

Posts myspace with several camwhore looking pictures

Then she gets criticised:

>I can't really say that you seem to have any insecurity about your looks. If you really thought you were ugly, then why the several cam-whore looking pictures of yourself? Methinks this is a thread is a sympathy thread.

She backpedals:

>Alrighty, first of all I never said I thought I was ugly..

What, what? Say that again? First of all, you did clearly say that.
Second of all, if you didn't think you were ugly, and this wasn't a sympathy thread, then why the fuck post the pictures of yourself? (Which I might emphasise, are very camwhore looking.)

I'm with >>22 on this one.

25 Name: Anonymous : 2007-05-18 14:38 ID:xyCIIOQn

Ah, >>24, i'd have to disagree. This isn't a sympathy thread. No, no - clearly, this is a mercilessly bash the n00b with all the cynical attitude of a /b/tard thread.

Shall we start DESU DESUing and hailing Raptor Jesus while we're at it?

Christ... It's just some girl having trouble dealing with the social pressures of high school, nothing more.

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