To be fair I think cheaters of both sexes deserve an ass-kicking. It's about fairness really. You can hurt someone by cheating but they can't hit you back? It's like saying that you shouldn't be entitled to defend yourself if someone makes a random hit at you.
While Emersonian self-reliance has merit insofar as things that people can control, there are matters of which are beyond their reach. Likewise people can influence people but not necessarily in the way that they want. In this case, I act nice to everyone and am generally a decent person but apparently that's not enough. It would be deranged to ask someone to reward me with a date based on said niceness but why go for all the people who make their interest readily clear? Why don't they make their interest known without needing some initiation by the other party? All this seems to be indicating that I need to become someone more outgoing but the idea of changing my basic personality just to appeal romantically to people when there's nothing inherent in shyness is appalling. Genuine decency is apparently not enough in a mate. The notion that missed chances are all the man's fault due to his lack of approaches is such an irritating concept that whoever adheres to it needs an ass-kicking. You don't seem like one of those types but as someone who has associated with a broad spectrum of women in all environments, it seems this type of women is exceedingly rare. It's agonizing how guys of across the spectrum seem varied but there's only two types of women: The standard and the unorthodox and the standard is a chore to deal with.
Even then, a woman will never ask someone out. Instead they'll continue send half-assed signals then blame the man just because he can't interpret the signals or didn't want to make an ass out of himself based on misunderstandings. In the latter case they'll label men cowards but women aren't cowardly too? What's worse is how much on the short end of the stick shy guys are on. Women are expected to be asked out but they'll never show the same courtesy to guys. Sometimes it's just a fear of arrest or social inabilities that prevents me from approaching but this is apparently something inexcusable in a woman's eyes.