Approaching Women (121)

1 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-09-19 12:28 ID:qTBJXIZr

I'm in a mixed high school... and can't communicate with women...

2 years before it I was in a boys only school. I now can't talk to any girls because I can never think of anything to say. I can talk to men easily because I've been with them before my temporary transfer to the boyschool, so I knew a little about them. But I never knew anything about the girls...

I can communicate with them online because you seem obliged to reply. That and I could think of something to say without looking weird. I try to follow them around, and contribute something if I knew something about the topic, but they usually have that "who the fuck are you?" look on their faces.

I was a girl's lab partner today... and we both acted like robots because we didn't show emotion. Everybody else was enjoying their experiments while she looked like "ugh, I wish I didn't come to school today."

I appear to be normal, my hair is just a bit long. I can't really smile or give a little one because of my braces. I'm not nerdy or anything...

So 4-ch, how can I start communicate with the other gender?

2 Name: Anonymous : 2007-09-19 13:24 ID:46sH77+e

Don't be afraid to smile! Braces aren't something that has to be hidden away. If you don't smile at all, even if it's because of something like that, girls tend to get really uncomfortable. Women enjoy having conversations with men who appear happy and confident. A smile is a very important thing. Also, keep eye contact just like you would with a guy. Talking with girls isn't that much different from talking with guys, except that you should probably mind your manners a bit more, such as not cussing as much and staying away from subjects a girl might think are "gross".

Guys and girls are both human, and so much of what separates us is just our way of looking at things. When it comes to communicating, there shouldn't be a huge difference in approach. One thing I can tell you is to talk to more than just one girl constantly, so she doesn't start to think you're interested in being more than friends. Unless you -are- interested in being more than friends, of course. ^_^

3 Name: Anonymous : 2007-09-19 14:02 ID:d4uE5O7b

You should be lucky you have braces. I went through high school with messed up teeth and it was hell. Girls were interested in me but as soon as I started talking, they were drawn away. You could imagine how bad I felt. I managed to work around it and still got a few girls but it nagged at me every time I looked in the mirror. Anyways, I have braces now and my confidence has been through the roof. You shouldn't for a second be ashamed of your braces. They are a visible sign of you trying to improve yourself and just imagine how it would be if you DIDN'T have them.

4 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-09-19 14:20 ID:qTBJXIZr

>>2

I was thinking of that. I always want to give a smile and say hello to everybody in the morning, but yet I feel that I shouldn't for some reason.

>>3

I'm not ashamed of it, it just limits a smile without showing the teeth.

5 Name: Anonymous : 2007-09-19 18:09 ID:1lBKTJds

>>4
If you're not ashamed of your braces, then when are you terrified of showing your teeth?

6 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-09-19 21:40 ID:qTBJXIZr

>>5
I'm not too confident about showing my teeth...

7 Name: Anonymous : 2007-09-19 23:12 ID:PepwCspG

>>6
yeah i got braces too, my smile is more of a smirk now, unless im actually laughing. but if a girl is shallow to the point where she wont look past the braces as to how good of teeth you'll have afterwards...she aint worth it

8 Name: Anonymous : 2007-09-19 23:34 ID:lLdze+IM

Joke that cunninglingus with braces creates an electrochemical reaction she will never forget.

9 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-09-20 09:16 ID:qTBJXIZr

I've managed to reduce the lazy look on my face... it used to be like:
-_-

and now it's a bit like: =)

10 Name: Anonymous : 2007-09-20 11:28 ID:0V0dWEVF

> I was a girl's lab partner today... and we both acted like robots because we didn't show emotion. Everybody else was enjoying their experiments while she looked like "ugh, I wish I didn't come to school today."

This is your major problem. People are shy because they don't know what other people think of them. They tend to over analyse little things, and because of their insecurity, they assume other people don't like them. When in fact, the other person might of just been frowning because they don't like chemistry, or their cat died yesterday. You should have more faith in yourself, and believe that you are someone worth talking to. Asking her questions is always good. It almost always leads on to other things. And relax dude, guys with braces are kind of cute.

Ps. The smirk thing they do is very cute (in a "oh he's self conscious..aww, i want to kiss him" sort of way), but seeing a guy full on grin is always lovely and can make my day.

11 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-09-20 21:26 ID:qTBJXIZr

>>10

Thank you so much. I feel more confident now...

Is it still okay if my lips are a bit larger than normal size? I tend to breathe through my mouth because my nose is always blocked. I am going to get a nose spray soon though.

12 Name: Ahiko : 2007-09-21 03:52 ID:/uPcdeU+

>>11

Lip size shouldn't matter much unless you have a cold sore or something. :) If you're too conscious about small matters like your natural physical appearances, you'll worry too much about it and it'll become apparent to the girl that you're too conscious about yourself. ;[ Girls like to see guys with some self-confidence (just not too much).

13 Name: Anonymous : 2007-09-21 04:25 ID:o1CzTCiB

>>10 "This is your major problem. People are shy because they don't know what other people think of them. They tend to over analyse little things, and because of their insecurity, they assume other people don't like them."

wow you just analyzed me.
i need to seek help.

14 Name: 10 : 2007-09-21 13:01 ID:0V0dWEVF

>>11

No worries, I'm glad I could help.

Your lips should be the least of your worries. It's just like saying "Are my ears too big?", "My eyes too small?". It shouldn't really matter relative to you as a whole person. The effort you put into worrying about what other people think of your lips, the more it prevents you from being able to balance it with your personality. In other words, you're doing exactly what I told you not to do in >>10. Besides, from what I've seen, big lips would work in your favour. They might even be your asset. I've always noticed that with thick lipped guys, my eyes always get drawn towards their lips whenever they talk.

And I'm sure people can deal with the fact that you breathe through your mouth. Although, I guess it would be better that you breathed through your nose instead. Just so you don't look like you're always short on breathe or something. I know some people find that annoying.

>>13
I know this because I used to be very shy as well. You don't need help. You just have to care less about what other people think of you. I started coming out of my shell by doing little things. If you're walking down the hall and you make eye contact with someone, smile, instead of averting your eyes. GREET PEOPLE. Meet new people. Befriend the new guy in your class. Because chances are, he's gonna be quite shy too. Talking to other shy people is sometimes good because you're perhaps not as intimidated by them, and you practise leading the conversation.

You kind of work your way up from there I guess. It was pretty much a snowball effect for me. Once I got started, other people noticed more of me and people started approaching me for conversations soon after. Most importantly, don't be discouraged if you don't get the reactions you want. The change won't happen overnight.

15 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-09-22 15:12 ID:qTBJXIZr

I greeted people once. But I switched to be shy and run off as soon as they wanted to reply. I'm like the new guy, because I re-entered the school.

The only problem with my school is that people always go in groups. Boys usually run off playing sports, and I'd rather go and look for people to talk to, and end up going to the girl groups. When I'm with one, I stand in the area and try to contribute to the subject but my voice isn't too loud and ends up drowned in the conversation. Sometimes they don't even know I'm there.

I really want to talk to people that came to my school when I wasn't there, but I either can't find them, or would look odd sitting in the cafeteria trying to talk to people, or they're in a big group walking around.

16 Name: Anonymous : 2007-09-22 16:38 ID:ttt8bXjU

just talk to them like you would anyone else. We're not some seperate species that speaks a strange language, you know.

17 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-09-25 12:22 ID:pZA9iP7x

>>16

I would do that if I HAD SOMETHING TO TALK ABOUT OTHER THAN SCHOOL WORK!

Here's the status so far:

All my attempts have resulted in the opposite image I wanted to give - people are making fun of me behind my back, calling me disgusting nicknames... I guess it's the damn culture they have here - SISies. See, Insult, Spread.

I think I'll start attacking people like I did in my previous school. Or live the rest of my life with a blank mask

18 Name: Anonymous : 2007-09-25 13:31 ID:QI66Smc1

>>17

maybe you should stop beeing a boring bastard and get a life... then you'll have something to talk about.

19 Name: Anonymous : 2007-09-25 13:41 ID:ic/TpV+z

>>17
theres loads to talk about other than school work. you can ask something as simple as what they did at the weekend (i find its best to stear clear of asking what they are planning for the coming weekend unless you know them already, otherwise they might just think youre trying to come on to them) and even if you did nothing but sit at home fapping over hentai just make something interesting up.

20 Name: Anonymous : 2007-09-25 14:36 ID:0V0dWEVF

>>17

>All my attempts have resulted in the opposite image I wanted to give - people are making fun of me behind my back, calling me disgusting nicknames... I guess it's the damn culture they have here - SISies. See, Insult, Spread.

Out of interest, where are you from?
Sounds like a pretty unfair and harsh reception given you're trying to make an effort.

21 Name: Anonymous : 2007-09-25 15:32 ID:NnkPfFrk

>>20 You never know, maybe OP is just abominably ugly, or smelly.

22 Name: Anonymous : 2007-09-25 15:51 ID:+c8ubkkU

If it's spiralling out of control like it sounds like it is, I recommend you give up at the moment trying to introduce yourself to new girls. The other kids probably think you're trying too hard. I suggest you play it a bit cooler and play with the kids who are doing sports, get to know a few of them, than take it from there.

23 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-09-25 21:26 ID:pZA9iP7x

>>20

A country in Asia that has everyone thinking they're on TV.

>>18

Do you really think people would be intrested in just the stuff I did over the holidays? They'd rather talk about that with their friends.

>>19

I usually try to talk about the things that happen to me, but they usually clearly show a WTF look on their face.

>>22

Over here, men are easier to talk to because their intrests are always clear. If I try to play sports with the other kids then I might end up looking like a wannabe.

I have got some real friends way before I started this thread, I just want to get some more...

24 Name: 10 : 2007-10-01 04:57 ID:0V0dWEVF

>>23
Oh...Asia.

So my first guess is Hong Kong. If not, Singapore, because your English is pretty good.

Well. I'm Asian myself, but I grew up in Australia. I don't like to generalise, but my experience with overseas Asian students are that they're pretty quick to judge people. Not to mention they gossip a lot. They can be pretty critical of people they don't know. But I guess you would know more about this stuff than I do. If I were you, I wouldn't do anything that's not true to myself. Don't try to force conversations or friendships, because that's what it sounds like you are doing. If you are comfortable and confident in yourself, people will be attracted to you naturally.

> I usually try to talk about the things that happen to me, but they usually clearly show a WTF look on their face.

I can't think how this would happen. Unless you randomly barged into their conversation or something.

Recreational sport is actually a great way to start friendships. As long as you're competent at it.

25 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-01 14:50 ID:ZVHbLYhP

Make her laugh! It always works! Trust me.

26 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-10-02 21:01 ID:fwWC4IGe

>>25

Yes. But the act of groups is in order and I can't simply talk to one or two to start off with.

>>24

That's a really accurate description of my school... I usually try to talk to them when their conversation has died down, but the WTF face is still there.

27 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-10-22 05:17 ID:vQj8RNzJ

Here's a little status report.

People seem to be ignoring me. It was another student's birthday recently, and her mother being the teacher during that lesson led to a little sharing of cake. I was last and the student herself was like "Oh, him." as if she forgot me.

Another incident was when we had to choose each other for a little game. Everyone had their turns and I was chose last because I was the only choice.

Some people seem to be talking about me negatively when I'm near them as if I'm not there.

When given the choice, nobody wants to sit next to me.

28 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-22 06:58 ID:RhgzbcLC

>>27

Aren't there activities organised at your school? You should probably join some you are interested in, to start socializing,...

Also, pay attention to people around you. Perhaps you are not the only one being excluded. If you find another person who seems also isolated, strike a conversation. The person will be more eager to talk to you than the rest of the group.

Still, it seems you should review the way you speak to people, you seem to somehow make them uncomfortable. If you just can't identify it, then speak less and listen more, in a conversation. Instead of speaking about you, ask questions about the other. People like to speak about themselves, and you will understand them better.

29 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-22 07:46 ID:AK1UM2B2

>>1
become gay
problem solved

30 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-10-22 13:24 ID:HllZaEFt

>>28

There are, but most of the ones that could help me socialise are full.

I took your advice on "treat a girl like a normal human being" and yet they go "That's no way to treat a girl!"

I don't know why, but I speak in a different tone at school. Darker and deeper. I try to avoid this but just can't.

>>29

I have become gay in one girls view, she said that "aren't you like, really close to him? hang out with him, not us, it's gay.". I reply saying that hanging around guys and not even near girls is even more gay. So she says that's gay too. So what am I to do?

I think it's because of judging a book by it's cover. I think I'm only shy because they're not helping. They think I'm shy because I don't want to talk to them.

31 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-22 14:08 ID:fKIS9UQL

>>30
Seriously man, it sounds like the girls in your school are complete bitches.

The problem with school is that kids are always cruel to each other. I don't know why, that's just the way it is.

If they don't want to talk to you, then nothing you can do is going to change that.

How old are you? (This might have already been answered, I didn't read the whole thread.)

You'll find that people get more mature as they get older, and they won't be so nasty all the time.

Maybe you should ask your parents if you can change school.

32 Name: 10 : 2007-10-22 14:22 ID:pku9+re2

Wtf at your school seriously.

Maybe you are trying too hard. Perhaps you're one of those annoying people who doesn't even know it.

Regardless, stay strong, and fuck them all. Their loss.
Chances are, you're 13-15. People mature and change a lot by the time they're 17. Just a phase. Puberty works wonders.

33 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-22 17:56 ID:AK1UM2B2

>>30
if you became gay you wouldn't care.
start fucking dude, srsly.
HOW DO I BECOMED GAY?

34 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-10-22 22:19 ID:HllZaEFt

>>32

Well. I always sit by myself and just wait for the bell to ring at break and lunchtime. Why can't they just remember that soon they'll have to learn how to tolerate the differences between them? Some girls older than me get along with geeks pretty easily and I wonder, "If the girls my age always think they're so mature, then why can't they act like this?".

35 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-23 00:02 ID:4SFkO27v

STOP BEING AUTISTIC AND CATCH TEH GHEY YOU'LL BE BETTER OFF LOLS

36 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-23 00:54 ID:8+R5LAIp

shadow, my advice (and take it with a grain of salt or so) is to continue the way your going and stop caring about popularity or friends. I am not saying that you shouldn't have any, but rather that most of the people you meet in high school are not 1)friend-worthy or 2)interesting. If you see someone engaged in an activity that you enjoy, start up a conversation - otherwise focus on personal development. If you're not liked in school, go hit the library or a few of the better teachers when you have time. If you check out [interesting] books, the librarians might start up a conversation or so (I still am friends with one of my HS librarians) and some of the teachers enjoy a well thought-out argument (spent a lot of time with my pol. sci teacher arguing about security post 9-11). Other than that, get a few books and start studying things that you like. If you show knowledge about the subjects in class, you can usually get away with non-class material presuming that it is semi-relevant (or the teacher is lax). Most of my high school peers know me only because I knew most of the material and 1)questioned the teacher in class or 2)they asked me for help.

37 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-23 01:29 ID:YO4JfWw4

>>34
Because bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks.

38 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-23 02:03 ID:OerNQer+

Get some good manly friends
They'll teach you how to stop being a little introverted, paranoid pansy

39 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-23 03:48 ID:AK1UM2B2

Get some good manly friends
They'll teach you how to start having a little prolapsed, dripping rectum

40 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-10-23 10:07 ID:CS4mztal

>>37

Truer words have never been spoken.

>>36

I did try staying in the library and reading books, but that led to me being called emo. I can't stand that fucking word because it reminds me of how stupid we can all be, and forget that we could be friendlier.

I do play cards with some of my friends at break/lunch. It's just that I want to know more about the people that entered the school when I was away for the past 2 years.

SMS/MSN is my most common and relaxed way to talk. I usually talk in SMS/MSN like I do in real life, but why don't they realise that I can talk like that?

I was talking to someone in my history class after school in SMS.

Me: "Hey, how did you do in the test?"
Her: "Not well"
Me: "Well, can't expect much since the highest mark was 14/20. What did you get?"

No reply from that, so a few minutes later:

Me: "You could have gotten better than my 10/20."

Still no reply.

41 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-10-24 08:18 ID:k980+53t

Another thing. I see the girls I want to talk to going "yeahrighttherehellyeahfucklet'sdoityahyah" and general open chat. When I try to talk them they seem to go "fuck YOUUUUUUUUU" subliminally. (It might help to watch Pablo Fransisco)

Am I intimidating? Or is it because I'm male? Or are they plain shit?

42 Name: 10 : 2007-10-24 10:28 ID:pku9+re2

>Me: "Hey, how did you do in the test?"
>Her: "Not well"
>Me: "Well, can't expect much since the highest mark was 14/20. What did you get?"

I think you need to learn a bit about reading people.
Usually when someone says "Not well" in response to a test score, you do not pressure them for a score unless you're close buddies with them. It's not polite to keep pushing for an exact score when they've clearly evaded the actual question. Instead, you should be sympathetic with something like "Don't worry, everyone did bad. It was a hard test." If you really wanted to know, you could ask her "Did you pass?". There is more chance of her replying to that than a straight up "What did you get?". If she doesn't answer, then you could deduce that she didn't pass and then change the subject quickly.

Also, your last line "You could have gotten better than my 10/20" sounds a bit conceited. I know that it wasn't you intention, but it sounds like you're boasting about passing and challenging her with her score. Plus, if she didn't tell you your score the first time, the second time you asked would have already been a bit persistent. The third time, she would have considered you plain nosy and inconsiderate.

But anyway, methinks you just asked for her marks to strike up a conversation. Test marks aren't exactly a good icebreaker unless the other person has done well (in which case you could congratulate and inflate her ego a bit). Point is, when she replied with "Not well", my first thought would have been to sympathise and then play it down or let her know you can relate to her. "No worries, that test wasn't worth much anyway". Or, "Yeah, neither did I. Sucks." Following this, it would be smart to change to a completely different conversation topic.

43 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-24 11:38 ID:/8mNHfJr

i have no problems talking to women. but the thing that gets me is if i like one.. i have no idea how to tell her. like, do you just ask em out and hope it works itself out or what? i can never tell if they feel the same way. its so irritating and ive blown alot of chances over the years.

44 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-24 11:40 ID:/8mNHfJr

oh, and i also would like to add: im similar to OP but was in an all boys school for a whole 8 years. from grades 5 to twelve...

45 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-10-25 07:04 ID:k980+53t

ITT a person who fails to communicate those with two X chromosomes, not a person who fails to communicate with a certain girl

46 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-10-26 07:06 ID:k980+53t

Oh, one of my fellow classmates's birthday party is tommorow. I would have asked, but she doesn't know me. If I did come I would try to socialise with people there, but they don't know me either.

Am I a ghost to them or something? I'm not even being treated like a new student.

47 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-26 08:23 ID:q8AVlUIx

Don't follow girls around! We find it creepy.

48 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-26 09:49 ID:Heaven

>>46

Why would they invite someone they don't know? Especially if it's an exclusive event?

49 Name: ViolentAJ : 2007-10-26 11:10 ID:mca0Yt4j

See. That's why diversity, oops, sorry, I meant diverSHITty is bad.

50 Name: ViolentAJ : 2007-10-26 11:10 ID:mca0Yt4j

See. That's why diversity, oops, sorry, I meant diverSHITty is bad.

51 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-10-27 00:50 ID:k980+53t

>>47

I don't anymore. It's not like anybody would want to talk to me.

I like the term "inside out than outside in". I just want to try to talk to people but they're not giving a fuck.

52 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-10-28 11:14 ID:k980+53t

I'll just carry on as it is. As the year passes, more things happen to everybody so later on that can be discussed, like in my first year of my boys school before this. Complete noob, later on became normal. But that's a boys school, it's small so it was pretty okay for people to not play sports because there weren't many facilities. Now in a school with lots of facilities, it might be tougher.

Before the boys-school period/timeskip I only survived from hanging out with someone which is now gay. He is always with the girls which made it more easy for me.

53 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-10-28 11:16 ID:k980+53t

They'd rather talk about me than talk to me.

Person A: "Wow, that guy's hair is really long..."
Person B: "Yeah, I wonder why?"

instead of

Person A: "Wow, you have really long hair... Why did you grow it?"
Me: "Because ... ... etc"

54 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-29 01:39 ID:qYgfTmv3

I have issues talking to women too. Although my issues are more in the realm of inability to start a conversation. If the other side keeps it going, then there' no problem at all. And funnily enough I don't have the same problem with starting conversations if the other party is a guy.

55 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-29 03:54 ID:L0H0kb9w

i personally find it very very easy to talk women, the key is confidence.

56 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-29 05:05 ID:vQj8RNzJ

>>55

Ah. How do you start conversations, usually?

HOW DO I GAINED CONFIDENCE?

57 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-29 17:39 ID:Heaven

I'm backing >>47 up.

Following girls around is one of the worst things you can possibly do. I've been following a girl for a few weeks now and I completely ruined her life. Her reputation is torn to shreds and I feel like such a jerk having done that to her.

The only problem is I realized how much of a jerk I was too late. I got an IM from her ex-boyfriend telling me to forget she even exists or else his gang is going to kick my ass.

I've never been so paranoid in my life.

58 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-10-30 11:24 ID:SDy3dEEh

Online conversation:

Me: Hey, X.
Her: hi
Me: how are you?
No reply
Me: (Damnit, I try to start a normal conversation and she blows me off...)

(if you guys don't really want to help or can't help etc, then let me at least rant here.)

59 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-30 12:29 ID:Heaven

>>57

Yes, I really cannot stress how creepy and annoying it is when a guy starts following you around. It can really turn a guy from potential interest, then tolerable "friend-zoned" guy, then most annoying person on Earth. Of course some girls like lapdogs, but either way, it's a lose/lose for the guy.

60 Name: Sathvelos!!7dqJVZgC : 2007-10-30 13:13 ID:/8mNHfJr

>>58
omg man i have that same thing. like wtf do they want from us? do we have to do all the talking? seriously, i dont know why i even bother at times, sometimes its like talking to a fucking wall. i mean fuck, if they dont like me they could just say it instead of snubbing me off like nothing. rude cunts

61 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-10-30 23:37 ID:vQj8RNzJ

>>60

EXACTLY. I try to be polite and ask them questions rather than talk about myself, but they find it ANNOYING and CREEPY. it SUCKS.

62 Name: Anonymous : 2007-10-31 03:52 ID:JPA+c4Gc

>>60 >>61

Do you talk to those people in real life in the same way you try to talk to them online? It's weird to have a conversation with somebody online when you wouldn't have it face-to-face. Don't try to use online conversation as a crutch when "real life" conversation isn't going as planned. Personally I don't add people to my MSN unless I'm already pretty well aquanted - as in, I can chat to them about anything and online is just an extension of real-life/phone convo if i cant actually be in contact via those methods.

Also, on a slightly different note

>>54
When talking to a girl, try to imagine the things you would talk about with a guy. Obviously steer clear of more "guy subjects" (e.g. boobs or farts or whatever) but just try to think about the kind of structure your conversations with guys have and then see if you can apply that structure (with modification if necesary) to conversations with girls

63 Name: Sathvelos!!7dqJVZgC : 2007-10-31 15:15 ID:/8mNHfJr

>>62 yeah i wasnt talking about when its online however thats pretty true what your saying.

64 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-11-01 22:13 ID:SDy3dEEh

>>62

I do try to talk to them in real life like I would on MSN. I just add them in case I need to talk about school or anything.

I do try to talk to them as if I would talk to a guy without the guy subjects, but they're still against me.

65 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-11-06 09:07 ID:qTBJXIZr

All right, new girl.

Chance came and gone because she was abducted by the popular group.

I might suggest to my homeroom teacher for her to introduce herself tommorow, and everybody else introduces themselves.

Good idea? Bad idea?

66 Name: Sathvelos!!7dqJVZgC : 2007-11-06 12:03 ID:/8mNHfJr

i probably wouldnt do that. dont you have like, classes with her that most of her friends dont?

if all else fails, just wait till you finish school. your more likely to score in a way more open environment where people dont just stick to their own little tight group of friends. eg uni or work.

67 Name: Anonymous : 2007-11-06 12:21 ID:Heaven

didn't you say that people at your school don't accept/welcome new people? or words to that effect...

she was accepted relatively easy...whilst you're complaining about people being apparently nasty...

methinks you are trying a little too hard. don't force yourself onto others.

oh, and that introduction thing is a bad idea btw. you're not exactly class representative, and she might not like the idea of drawing so much attention to herself. most new people just want to melt in with the rest of the co. until they establish their own roots.

68 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-11-07 11:09 ID:lT/8qYyy

I don't try at all, really.

69 Name: Anonymous : 2007-11-07 13:44 ID:EtrnyfaJ

>>66

People don't stick viciously to their cliques in university or work? Just what planet do you live on, son?

70 Name: Sathvelos!!7dqJVZgC : 2007-11-07 14:06 ID:/8mNHfJr

>>69 i was comparing it to how it was like in school. first year uni is a great time to make new friends and branch out more. for example, not every single person in a group of friends is likely to go to the exact same university. all im saying, is all those tight little friendships that went on in school arent as abundent in uni. i at least havent encountered any impenetrable cliques so far, and im in my 3rd year.

71 Name: Anonymous : 2007-11-08 04:37 ID:EtrnyfaJ

>>70

Maybe your school just works differently. I'm in my 6th year at mine, and the cliques here have been utterly impenetrable since day one. Even tried joining a club that matched my interests, only to find that the existing club members had this "circle the wagon trains" thing going on, to the point of being borderline hostile to an incomer like me.

My experience with the working world has been much the same, only there you have to navigate the minefield of office politics, where one wrong step can get you reported or fired. I will concede that high school is worse, but what comes after still isn't exactly love and skittles.

72 Name: Sathvelos!!7dqJVZgC : 2007-11-08 06:33 ID:/8mNHfJr

>>71 yeah good point

73 Name: Anonymous : 2007-11-10 16:11 ID:Ck480BM3

Meet a girl you hate. That will force you to get over the idea that women are a different species that don't share you're language.

74 Name: Anonymous : 2007-11-11 09:29 ID:v1hbs7x2

It doesn't even have to be a girl you hate, it only has to be a girl you don't want to have sex with.

75 Name: Sathvelos!!7dqJVZgC : 2007-11-11 15:25 ID:/8mNHfJr

>>74 they don't exist, unless they are so ugly they look like man. lol, but if thats the case, why would anyone talk to them?

76 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-11-12 08:14 ID:lT/8qYyy

Okay, back to the new girl thing.

I usually see here alone. Should this be a good chance to approach her and try to talk to her and get to know her better?

77 Name: Sathvelos!!7dqJVZgC : 2007-11-12 11:07 ID:/8mNHfJr

>>76 yes.

78 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-11-14 09:52 ID:H7hLRYb5

Now I'm faced with a new problem.

Either play cards with my good friends
Approach the lonely new girl

I think I should give them my cards to play, then approach the girl for the time being.

79 Name: Anonymous : 2007-11-14 09:57 ID:PKdFnfnd

fuck, play all of them.. chances may never come again. make the most dumb fuck

80 Name: Sathvelos!!7dqJVZgC : 2007-11-14 11:33 ID:/8mNHfJr

>>79 agreed. srsly, just go for it. try and get as much poon as possible.

/thread

81 Name: Anonymous : 2007-11-14 13:39 ID:pku9+re2

I thought "new girl" was abducted by the popular clique.
Get your info clear first before you ask for advice.
With the wrong info, you're just asking for wrong advice.
If she is indeed lonely, then the nice thing is to introduce yourself, and then ask if she wants to join your group for lunch. I'm assuming you just have the intention, and want to give the impression of being just friends. If you evidently ditched your group to spend alone time with her, then she and others would think that you want more than friends.

82 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-11-14 21:57 ID:H7hLRYb5

She was abducted by the popular clique, now that they're done "leeching" off her she walks alone.

I was going to tell my friends to play cards without me, because it's my cards so they won't have to be all "grr he hang out with girl"

83 Name: Anonymous : 2007-11-14 22:43 ID:npRYuyy6

I don't understand why inviting her to play cards with your friends is out of the question. Surely if she doesn't know the rules of the game you can teach her, which would be a great ice-breaker.

84 Name: Anonymous : 2007-11-15 01:59 ID:v1hbs7x2

Yum, teaching a girl to play cards. Resting lightly behind her with my arms around her, pointing at the cards, whispering hints in her ear while the sweet smell of her shampoo plays with my senses. Obsess

85 Name: Sathvelos!!7dqJVZgC : 2007-11-15 02:47 ID:/8mNHfJr

>>84 lol

>>83 good point. shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 should do this... just dont let it become a competition between friends to get into her pants.

86 Name: Anonymous : 2007-11-15 03:44 ID:pku9+re2

>>85
Does OP even want to get into her pants?

If all else fails, remember bros before hoes.

87 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-11-15 08:42 ID:H7hLRYb5

Great! This thread has really helped me so far.

I'll try tommorow, was busy today.

88 Name: Sathvelos!!7dqJVZgC : 2007-11-15 12:23 ID:/8mNHfJr

>>86 well i would assume so. and yes, bros before hoes UNLESS you actually have an opportunity to get into her pants for real lol

89 Name: Anonymous : 2007-11-15 12:43 ID:pku9+re2

>>88
Guys misreading friendship zones as "opportunities", as well as devious girls waving enough just bait to keep you hanging, is a sad fact of life.

90 Name: Sathvelos!!7dqJVZgC : 2007-11-15 13:01 ID:/8mNHfJr

>>89 indeed. but at least some people/OP are trying, rather than not doing anything because its "a waste of time". you never know, he could get lucky

91 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-11-15 21:44 ID:H7hLRYb5

Well, I would let her play cards but I don't want to stop her from getting other friends.

92 Name: Anonymous : 2007-11-16 00:02 ID:npRYuyy6

>>91
But you said in >>82 that she now walks alone again. So nobody is stepping up to be her friend so you and your group should if you want any kind of chance. Even if its just being friends she'll be glad to have people make an effort to get to know her.

93 Name: Sathvelos!!7dqJVZgC : 2007-11-16 03:23 ID:/8mNHfJr

>>91 if you let her play cards with you it doesnt mean your "claiming" her as a definate part of your group. if she doesnt bother to try and make more friends other than yours than thats her problem and her choice.

94 Name: Anonymous : 2007-11-16 08:21 ID:TrkqXTWs

This boy lusting pedophile is amused by this thread.

When the ice melts, the man who can't ice skate laughs hardest, lol.

95 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-11-20 21:54 ID:H7hLRYb5

And just when I thought it was safe for me to talk to her, she gets abducted by the popular groups.

There's another new girl, she walks alone more often and I want to talk to her. Though, when she passes by, I don't have the guts to move and talk...

96 Name: Sathvelos!!7dqJVZgC : 2007-11-21 03:00 ID:/8mNHfJr

just do it, you'll probably get rejected at first but think of it as practice.

97 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-12-01 10:52 ID:7NcUAkwa

Okay, so I tried.

walks towards new girl
closer
closer
closer

walks away

98 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-12-01 10:55 ID:7NcUAkwa

Whoa, I didn't know putting asterisks around words would make them italic.

99 Name: Anonymous : 2007-12-01 10:58 ID:GBSnplh+

*WTF?

100 Name: Anonymous : 2007-12-01 10:58 ID:GBSnplh+

WTF?

101 Name: Anonymous : 2007-12-01 10:58 ID:GBSnplh+

WHAT THE FUCK?

102 Name: Anonymous : 2007-12-01 11:07 ID:npRYuyy6

>>97

Erm that would look really weird if somebody walked up to me but then just walked away.

103 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-12-02 21:37 ID:jkTFpcVK

>>102

I walk up to them behind them. It's like Jaws, eating an unsuspecting person just like that.

104 Name: Anonymous : 2007-12-03 03:00 ID:v1hbs7x2

Eating? That's for much, much later.

105 Name: Anonymous : 2007-12-03 03:35 ID:KtN7Fz/R

1>> You're going to have to just man up and get practice in being rejected. You have to hit on women so much that being rejected doesn't bother you anymore. The mall or other teen hangout is a good place. I used to hit on cute girls in the drive-in windows at fast food restaurants. It doesn't matter how, but you have to get over your fear of rejection.

Girls smell fear.

106 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-12-03 12:07 ID:Fcx1a1Zc

>>105

Awesome.

I had a great day today, I felt unusually happy. Though I didn't approach that girl, but I tried to follow her and say hello, but failed...

I must gather my courage!

107 Name: Anonymous : 2007-12-03 17:02 ID:BEE3g8MS

>>106
stalker stalker stalker stalker stalker stalker stalker stalker stalker stalker stalker stalker stalker stalker stalker stalker

108 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-12-03 22:10 ID:Fcx1a1Zc

109 Name: shadow!WqZjpnt2w6 : 2007-12-03 22:11 ID:Fcx1a1Zc

110 Name: Anonymous : 2007-12-08 11:14 ID:pku9+re2

>>105
That is lame. Whilst it is important to be able to get over rejection, that is the worst possible way to go about it. Soon you'll earn the reputation of being a desperate fuck that would nail anything that walked on two legs. With that reputation, you're just setting yourself up for rejection and more failure.
OP will just have another reason for girls to not like him.

111 Name: Anonymous : 2007-12-08 12:49 ID:npRYuyy6

>>110

It depends if the women know each other. If you just go round at school and hit on every girl you see then yes you will be labelled as desperate. If you are out in town then women aren't going to know each other so you can talk to as many as you want because they're always coming and going. If they see you trying to hit on a girl and then going to them then again yes they will see you as desperate. But you just have to sit and wait a few minutes for people to walk off and then try with new women.

112 Name: Dr. X : 2007-12-08 21:45 ID:Ch3A/Ai6

I bet you never had a friend as a girl
I bet you never kissed a girl
I bet you never hugged one either
But that is my assumption.

You want to get better at something, practice it! The first is always hard, but it will be the greatest experience you will ever have. The more you do it, the more confidence you have and girl loves confidence. Also, ask something about themselves likes where did you get those shoes, what do you think about class, stuff like that. Most girls always talk, so if you just talk to one, they can't help it but just to talk back.

113 Name: Anonymous : 2007-12-09 13:01 ID:pku9+re2

>>111

Perhaps it could work at a club/pub scene...but I doubt OP is a person to socialise there. Even then, word spreads pretty quickly between girls/women. You shouldn't underestimate the level of their networking.

114 Name: Anonymous : 2007-12-09 15:43 ID:npRYuyy6

>>111 here

I suppose it also depends on what you are actually doing with these women. If you are just presenting yourself as a sociable guy trying to make friends then it's not so desperate; you could get away with working your way round a pub because you're not picking up women you're just having a fun time.

115 Name: Kira : 2007-12-10 09:28 ID:3NUpfweN

You can find many girl... The question lies with finding a "good" girl.

116 Name: Anonymous : 2007-12-10 11:57 ID:v1hbs7x2

>>115 speaks the truth, and kills criminals for JUSTICE.

117 Name: Anonymous : 2007-12-10 13:56 ID:Heaven

>>116
lol..

118 Name: Anonymous : 2007-12-11 13:12 ID:Heaven

When you think about it, Kira is just Batman on a larger scale.

119 Name: Anonymous : 2007-12-12 14:11 ID:Heaven

>>118
Ha. Howabout....no?

120 Name: Anonymous : 2007-12-19 12:49 ID:L10QHUOO

>>2
Girls are not human just act like you give a fuck about what their saying say "yea def" alot and smile and look them in their eye and be charming and show maners then they might give you their number and then you fuck em leave and call em again if you get horny.

121 Name: Anonymous : 2007-12-19 20:36 ID:Heaven

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