( ´ω`) hello kids!

(・∀・) Grandpa, what was Halloween like when you were younger?

( ´ω`) We had cosprayoween where we made costumes out of sheep skin... There was no fabric available you see.

(・∀・) Grandpa, I need to poo-poo but someone is using the washroom already. What should I do??

( ´ω`) Hold it. Pain builds character!

(・∀・) Grandpa, do you think we should let the WTFux dudes in?

( ´ω`) They should keep the Fux out.

( ´ω`) And the WT, too.

(・∀・) What's so bad about the WT Grandpa? I heard W.T. Snacks is an admirable fellow!

( ´ω`) Junior, whoever told you that is full of aids.

( ´ω`) 566, congratulations on getting the joke.

(・∀・) Grandpa! What´s wrong with the world?

( ´ω`) Well, Junior, you existing isn't helping matters.

(・∀・) Grandpa, do you like Yukorin?

( ´ω`) Truly a delicate orchid blossom of the East and easy to admire by any man. I have her perfume.

( ´ω`) Nabisco Vanilla Extract.

(・∀・) じちゃん。僕、日本語で喋ってもいい？

( ´ω`)　われはそんなこと読めないですから。。。

(・∀・) ぬるぽ

( ´ω`) が

(・∀・) waps..

Relevant Translations:
>>573= (・∀・) Grandpa. Is it ok for me to chatter in Japanese too?
>>575= ( ´ω`) I'm unable to read that kind of thing though...

(・∀・) Grandpa! You need subtitles!

( ´ω`) I have fansubs, go look for them kid.

(・∀・) you're otaku

(・∀・) Grandpa, have you ever met the King of all Cosmos?

(・∀・) Otoko no ko wa onna no ko no koto itsumo oikaketeru 〜♬

( ´ω`) Ichi-nichi-juu onna no ko no koto bakari kangaeteru 〜♫

(・∀・) Dakedo otoko no ko wa yappari sukoshi baka de 〜♬

( ´ω`) Zen zen onna no ko no kimochi nante hora wakaranai mitai 〜♫

(・∀・) Uu hontou ni dame yo ne obaka-san 〜♪
(・∀・) Oshiete hoshii no obakasan-san 〜♪
(・∀・) Sou kono yo de ichi-ban 〜♪
(・∀・) Taisetsuna koto wa 〜♪
(・∀・) Yappari taimingu dato omou kedo...nanchite na 〜♪

( ´ω`) Onna no ko mo otoko no ko no koto naze ka suki ni naru no 〜♪
( ´ω`) Hi-to-ban-juu nemurenai nante kurai muchuu ni naru 〜♪

(・∀・) Dakedo otoko no ko wa yappari itsumo baka de 〜♪
( ´ω`) Zen zen onna no ko no kokoro nante mada wakaranai mitai 〜♪

(・∀・) RaRa RaRaRaRa RaRaRaRaRaRaRaRaRaRaRa, Ra RaRaRaRa Ra
( ´ω`)RaRa RaRaRaRa RaRaRaRaRaRaRaRaRaRaRa, Ra RaRaRaRa Ra

(・∀・) これは、山手線ですか？

( ´ω`) This is Red Light District my son.

( ´ω`) What's that ching-chong crap, kid? In this thread, we're sticking to the Queen's English!

(・∀・) Granpa, it seems there is a time paradox here!

( ´ω`) hello kids!

( ( ((( ´ω`))) ) )

(・∀・) Oh no, a space-time distortion! Granpa, what will we do?

(・∀・) Oh no, a space-time distortion! Granpa, what will we do?

( ´ω`) hello kids!

(・∀・) Grandpa, what was life like before the internet?

( ´ω`) We had books I think. Something non-something.

(・∀・) Grandpa,I shot the sheriff! (Or is it I will shoot...)

( ´ω`) At least you didn't shoot the deputy sonny.

(・∀・) Grandpa, I want to learn to play like Petey Wheatstraw. Where's the nearest crossroads?

(・∀・) Grandpa?... Are you holding back answering because you want 600GET?

( ´ω`) At my age, 600 is nothing special.

( ´ω`) lol interweb

(・∀・) Grandpa, you fail got.

( ´ω`)ノ Pull my finger, Junior!

(・∀・) Grandpa, you like scat! ew.

( ´ω`) Take care, Junior. Given enough exposure to the internet, you'll come to like anything!

(・∀・) Grandpa, I want to be just like Densha Otoko!

( ´ω`) A true DQN strives to be Itoko Otoko.

( ´ω`) That's an admirable goal Junior! Back in my day, we created haiku poems about our idols:
Posting on 2ch,
even a nerd can find love,
Densha Otoko!

(・∀・) Is 2ch really 2 syllables? In any case, I wrote a haiku for you Grandpa-
Surprisingly wise,
packed with D.Q.N. spirit:
stinky old Grandpa!

( ´ω`)
　　⊂彡☆))Д´)　>>609

(`Д´) Geez Grandpa, I was trying to be nice!

(・∀・)
　　⊂彡☆))ω´)

( ´ω`) you just need to keep your mouth shut sometimes, sonny.

(・∀・)

( ´ω`)

(・⌢・)

( ´ω`) Cheer up, emo Junior!

(・∀・) Gradpa! You say daddy me snow me gonna bleeeam. Ali key bu-n bu-n nea.

( ´ω`) OMG WTFBBQ LOLZ fgsfds or whatever you kids reply to garbage like that these days

(・∀・) Gradpa! what do you know about postmodern alienation?

( ´ω`) I know it's not as imporant as blowing your nose every once in a while when you cannot even pronounce "Grandpa" correctly.

( ´ω`) Sonny, I'm sorry if I didn't tell you this before, but... Gradpa is dead. He couldn't stand more than a year of being a PhD.

(/｡＼)ｲﾔﾝ!

( ´ω`) lol what

(・∀・) Grandpa! Have you heard about Bridget?

　　　┌――――――――┐
　　 　｜.B１�@�A�B�C�D�E.　|
　 　　｜�F�G�H�I�J�K�L�M｜
　 　　└――――――――┘
　　　　 ┌―――┬―――┐
　　　　　|　　　　　 |　　　　　 |┌──────┐
　　　　　|　　　　　 |　　　　　 |│Out of service│
　　　　　|　　　　　 |　　　　　 |└──────┘
　 age 　∧＿∧ 　　／￣￣￣￣￣￣
　　▲C<丶｀∀´> ＜　comon comon！
　　▽ ＼　　　　）　| ＼＿＿＿＿＿＿
　sage　｜Ｏ　　|＿|＿＿＿|
　　　　　〈＿_〈＿〉

(・∀・) Gradpa! I copy paste to say: Gradpa! What do you do?

( ´ω`) You. Come over here...

( ´ω`)ハアハア

( ´ω`) "vocabulary is teh rohd 2 win intarweb." So build it, sonny.

(・∀・) Gradpa! You tried to reply to your own post but failed!

( ´ω`) Somebody busted my interweb. You damn kids been screwing with it?

(・∀・) N, no way Grandpa! There... there was this one-armed man, you see....

(・∀・) Grandpa! There's a young woman who's posing and prancing around seductively over her webcam, and something weird is going on in my pants! What should I do?

( ´ω`) Don't change the subject!
　　⊂彡☆))Д´)　>>633

( ´ω`) But go prvt with her anyway. Always go pvt!

( ´ω`) Pvt. Johnson and Lt. Conrad in 3rd division! Follow me! We've got soviets at 3 o'clock!

(・A・) You've having flashbacks again, Grandpa! Snap out of it!

(・∀・) Grandpa, if you could have one super power what would it be?

( ´ω`) To bring back Grandma at age 25. sigh

(・∀・) Grandpa! I beat tetris!

( ´ω`) The only way to win is not to play.

(・∀・) Grandpa! I beat Super Mario Bros.!

( ´ω`) Congratulations, Junior. Of course, back in the day we would have saved the princess in real life instead of wasting our time behind a flickering screen for hours.

(・∀・) Grandpa! You need more overlords.

　　　　------------ 、___
　　 / ￣￣￣7/'￣￣|| |__/＼
　 /' 　 　 ∧//　∧∧|| |　＼　＼　　　　　　　　flopflopflop
[/＿______.(ﾟ//[］(ﾟДﾟ )|| | <I hate overlord day！＼　＼ 　ﾐ　　ﾐ
||　　　 ___||￣￣ Ｕ　|| |＿＿__＼　＼　ﾐ　　ﾐ
lO|--- lO゜l l 　 　 　　||_|ニニニニニニｌ|( ´ω ( ´ω) ( ´ω)
|_∈口∋￣_l______ｌ⌒ ｌ.|＿＿＿__| ｌ⌒ｌ_||( ´ω) ( ´ω ( ´ω) ´ω`)
──`--'───`ー'─── ｰ' ー' ‐┐( ´ω) ω) ( ´ω`)
　　　　　　　　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 |　( ´ω) ( ´ω ( ´ω)
　　　　　　　　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 |　　( ´ω ( ´ω) ( ´ω)
　　　　　　　　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 |　　　( ´ω) ( ´ω)
　　　　　　　　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 |　　ﾟ､ヾ ( ´ω) ω) ｡/ｯﾟ
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ι〜〜〜〜〜っつ~~~~

( ´ω`) This Garden needs less WakabaMark :(

(・∀・) Grandpa! What should we do with the people who can't type your name right? Gradpa isn't cool

(・∀・) Gradpa! Disregard my last post. Because You Are Coolest!

( ´ω`) Why thank you child. Let me guess, disregard that anonymous sucks cocks?

(・∀・) Actually, it's "disregard that, I suck cocks". Note the added comma.

( ´ω`)Just because you are a dateless insecure geek, don't rag on inexperienced internet users

(・A・) …

(・∀・) NO U LOL

( ´ω`) Did you even understand what I said son?

(・A・) …

(・∀・) NO U LOL

( ´ω`) Son, you are losing coherence. I'm worried about you who will carry my name to future generations. Maybe you should attend the custody of a counsellor from tim 2 tim. OR I HAXOR TEH NET AND STEAL IDENTITY COZ I'M TEH NET HAXOR L33T &C0o1

(・A・) You've having flashbacks again, Grandpa! Snap out of it!

( ´ω`)You instead of bushing other people who are actually doing it,you better go out and start doing something with your life

(・∀・) Grammar, Grandpa, Grammar!

( ´ω`) Sonny, I'd like to ask some questions to you for a change. About what young people do these days.