( LΦ`) Hello, kids!
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( ί ί) YES!
( ί ί) I SAY YES!
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Journal has been deleted. If you are xenon2, you have a period of 30 days to decide to undelete your journal.
( x x) Well, at least I died wearing mittens.
( ά-ά) Well...
( x-x)
( E-E) No.
(EΝE) So what's for lunch, Grandpa?
(EΝE) Where's the beef?
(EΝE) Pin the blame on me, huh? Who the fuck destroyed the universe around here, Cramps?
( E-E) And what a beautiful derailment it was.
( E-E) thats crazy talk, take your pills, grandpa.
( E-E) Yeah, you need to cull your flock of clones a bit. Who knows what could happen to the universe if you let them run wild.
( LΦ`) They'd make a whole bunch of character threads that have no real direction or focus. Nothing major.
i L_½Mj How do you type with boxing gloves on your hands?
( LΦ`) These are my hands! THIS ISN'T A MASK.
( LΦ`) I don't really have a face.
( LΦ`) In fact, I'm technically not really alive.
( L[M) Just relax man. You don't need pills to be at ease like me.
( LΦ`) oh, ho ho! Look at this, children! A 700GET!
( E-E) It's worth popping a pill, dontcha think Cramps?
( LΦ`) I didn't use any illegal substances to achieve my 700GET! Stop calling me!
( LΦ`) ... Damn GET ethics committee...
( LΦ`) Leaf me out of your absurd hypothetical scenarios.
( LΦ`) No, that's fine. It's more profitable to reuse old questions. We can even fire the entire R&D division!
Your beloved Child Star Advisor warns:
( EΦE) YOU CAN'T CUT BACK ON FUNDING! YOU WILL REGRET THIS!
Your beloved beady-eyed drug dealer warns:
( E-E) TAKE YOU PILLS ALREADY! YOU WILL REGRET THIS!
(EΝE) But Grandpa, I don't want to ask any more questions. I think I'm ready to grow up and move along with my life.
( E-E) Yeah, all you got is that freakish beakish thingie.
i L_½MjHow do you type with boxing gloves on your hands?
( ί -ί) They're called mittens, thank you very much.
( LΦ`) No, it's because as your guardian I take all your earnings and gamble them away on poker nights.
(EΝE) I thought you spent it on beer.
( LΦ`) Yes, that's what we drink during poker nights. The strippers are also kinda expensive.
( LΦ`) Tom was born unloved and alone in a dirty hole like an animal.
( LΦ`) We're digging tunnels so animals can safely cross the road. Here's your shovel.
( LΦ`) No, because you are in DQN now, Junior, and in DQN no one will care if you whine.
( ₯-₯) Why do you always refuse to take your pills Grandpa. Everything would be so much better if you just cooperated. Just a little bit you know. A pill at a time isn't too much to ask for, right?
( ₯-₯) Lies and slander! Standard & Poor's gives my pill business the highest credit rating!
I think Grandpa is a pretty cool guy
eh says "hello kids" and isn't afraid of anyone
(EΝE) Grandpa, do we need an exorcist again?
( ₯-₯) I think we found the ghost.
(EΝE) Oh, it was just the narrator. Can you tell me how Grandpa died?
i L_½Mjhow many dead beady eyes does it take to change a light bulb?
i E_½Ej gee, I dunno. how many DOES it take?
-=WELL, THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO FIND OUT=-
(EΝE) Grandpa, why's it all gone dark?
( LΦ`) Beady Eyes was supposed to change the light bulb, but he's dead.
( LΦ`) Lazy fucker.
(EΝE) Why don't we cremate his body? That should lighten things up.
( ά-ά) Weeell, since beady eyes is dead and someone recently bumped my thread, perhaps it's time to bring back my gimmick?
( LΦ`) You had a gimmick?
(EΝE) We could harness the power of methane. Lighters ready when he shows his gimmick.
( E-E) I WAS going to be dead, but it looks like you simply can't continue the thread without me.
(EΝE) I still think we should cremate him.
( LΦ`) I second the motion.
( E-E) but cremation is painful if I'm still alive.
(EΝE) Motion carried! I'll get the gasoline!
( E-E) Looks like it's time to change my elemental affinity!
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(EΝE) Yay!
(EΝE) Who should we burn next?
( LΦ`) Well, I do have a few too many clones in the basement.
( EΦE) Pick me! Pick me!
( LΦ`) Not you. One of the others.
(EΝE) Grandpa -WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES?!?!?
( LΦ`) Not loving you enough. I don't regret it one bit, either.
(EΝE) FLUNK! Answering honestly.
(EΝE) ...
(EΝE) Start.
( LΦ`)