( LƒÖ`) Hello yet again, kids!
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( =0=) ...Meanwhile... |EQE|
(iœjĪªª²iœj) Now, let us take a look at the lives of those who were unable to survive in the dog-eat-dog world of Grandpa...
( LE__E) Through all the trials and tribulations, we have once again been forgotten.
i@LÍMjWhy has fate led us onto such a cruel path?
i*ß[ßjThis is getting pretty deep!
(L^ิ౪Oิ) DuRR
iBE_Ej...
( ' =_=) mmmm.
((/ ƒf.ㄟ) Through all the trials and tri...
J( '°`)‚µ You're just copying the first guy.
((/ ƒf.ㄟ) ...woo...
(ÜoÜ) Woh hoh hoh hoh
i@OÍOjBut really, this... sucks.
( ‹3‹) Why weren't we able to become true "Grandpa" characters?
(☄◣„t◢)☄ Frankpa and Mercpa were only around for like a week! That's fucked up.
S(◕ฺƒÃ◕ฺM¡) You're a lot more fucked up.
(☄◢„t◣)☄ Not funny, man...
( Ü-Ü) Even Clonepa pulled it off.
i *ß';;‚—ß'j And for that matter, who the hell is Blindpa?!
( ßÍß) Yeah, seri--
(ßÍß ) s-s-s-ser-serio-s-s
( ßÍß) s-s-s-s-s-ser-s-s-s-s-s-seri-s
( L_½M) Okay, that's enough. Into the van, rejects.
(MƒÊL) Wait! Can I interest you in some pamphlets?
(`„DL) I never got my ice cream!
„‹(`„DL„‹) WHY am I not on the list?? WHY??
( LƒÖ`) Just iss on Clonepa there, he won't mind.
(EÍE) ...
(EÍE) Okay, I'll bite. Grandpa, where's the 'p'?
( LƒÖ`)½p It's my walking cane, I need it.
i `['j chuckle You think you can get away by forgetting me? And who is this Louie retard?
[Part 7] ( LƒÖ`) Grandpa [Shit sux]
b material will be banned on sight.
( LƒÖ`) This is the last Grandpa thread
(EÍE) Grandpa, what is your Rock 'n Roll fantasy? What is your Rock 'n Roll dream?
(@¥ิm¥ิ) I don't think anyone knows this, but I've been writing Grandpa's material since 1977.
( Ü-Ü) Grandpa, I'm pretty sure Rock 'n Roll is dead.
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(EÍE) Grandpa, when I'm your age, do you think I'll have a "Junior" who is just as inquistive as I am?
( LƒÖ`) I just want to say, Jr., that I'm really really fed up with you, your jokes, silliness, and complete nonsense. I disown you, and your father. You destroyed what could have been considered Legendary, and reduced it to a pile of idiotisms. I hate you! You are a pig. Now get out before I call the cops.
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Ah HA!
( EƒÖE) Curses, foiled again.
('A` ) This Grandpa thread is almost over...
( EƒÖE) Shut up and finish my thread already.
(EÍE) Clonepa, nobody even bothers to correct your silly ways anymore.
( LƒÖ`) I think I'm starting to master senility.
( Ü-Ü) So have you learned to cope with it or have you literally mastered senility, granting you the ability to forget anything at any time?
( `ƒÖL) What was that?!
( `ƒÖL) Who are you!? Get the hell out of my thread!!
( Ü-Ü) Neither, then. Oh well.
(EÍE) Grand pa!
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Ah HA!
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( EÍE) TIME WARP!!!!!
( EÍE) It's just a jump to the left
( Ü-Ü) I feel like I'm in a bad sci-fi comedy film.
(EÍE) Why, Mr. Grandpa? Why do you do it? Why get up? Why keep fighting? Do you believe you're fighting for something? For more that your survival? Can you tell me what it is? Do you even know? Is it freedom? Or truth? Perhaps peace? Yes? No? Could it be for love? Illusions, Mr. Grandpa. Vagaries of perception. The temporary constructs of a feeble human intellect trying desperately to justify an existence that is without meaning or purpose. And all of them as artificial as the Matrix itself, although only a human mind could invent something as insipid as love. You must be able to see it, Mr. Grandpa. You must know it by now. You can't win. It's pointless to keep fighting. Why, Mr. Grandpa? Why? Why do you persist?
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(EÍE) Whoa.
( Ü-Ü) I am Kindness-san. I created this place. I've been waiting for you. You have many questions, and although the process has altered your consciousness, you remain irrevocably human. Ergo, some of my answers you will understand, and some of them you will not. Concordantly, while your first question may be the most pertinent, you may or may not realize it is also the most irrelevant.
(EÍE) Liar. Squeeks created this place.
( Ü-Ü) Sorry, but I got caught up in the theme.
( Ü-Ü) Also, 950get.
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( LƒÖ`) I can't let this fool off with a few slaps. Junior, fetch me my paddle!
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(EÍE) That was a bat grandpa. Paddles can't deliver such power.
( LƒÖ`) If you knew that already, why did you bring it when I told you to get the paddle?
( Ü-Ü) Grandpa, wake up. You dozed off just before 950 and your snoring has been disturbing everyone in the room.
i MƒnLjRise and shine, Mister Grandpa, rise and... shine. Not that I wish... to imply that you have been sleeping on... the job. No one is more deserving of a rest, and all the effort in the world would have gone to waste until... well... let's just say your hour has come again. The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference in the world. So wake up, Mister Grandpa...wake up and...smell the ashes.
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(EÍE) Grandpa, do you fear for Part 7?
( LƒÖ`) I'm too old to fear anything, Junior.
( ???) 1000GET
(EÍE) Still a bit early, ?pa.
(??? ) Shit, I fucked up my grand entrance into this thread. Just forget you ever saw me. I'll be back in a bit.
(EÍE) Who said I should forget what now?
( ???) I said you should forge-
( ???) ...Oh, right.
(??? ) Nothing, absolutely nothing.
(LƒÖ` ) Let me know when the next thread starts. I'll be at the bar.
(@¥ิm¥ิ) America drinks and goes home.
(EÍE) and we keep drivin'
(EÍE) into the night
(EÍE) its a late goodbye
(EÍE) such a late good bye~
( LƒÖ`) You are going down with me. Hand in unloveable hand.
(EÍE) I knew you wouldn't understand modern japanese hard industrial death metal, old man.
( Ü-Ü) This would be pretty depressing if it weren't so strangely amusing.
( LƒÖ`) And now, the end is in sight of another Grandpa thread.
(LƒÖ` ) Looking back, I see thousands of posts, some good, some awful.
( LƒÖ`) Looking at you, Junior, makes me feel like there's no future.
To quote the original Grandpa thread's 52nd post:
( LƒÖ`)“Ê What do you think? Fuckmitten.
(EÍE) That hurts.
( ß ƒŽß) Fuckmitten?
( ß -ß) ...
(ß- ß ) I'll be back in a moment. I have to go to the bathroom.
(ßo ß ) blarg
( ß ƒŽß) ok back
( ß ƒŽß) Grandpa, would you prefer MITTENS?...
( ß ƒŽß) ...
( ß -ß) ...Or a blanket...?
( Ü-Ü) I think he'd prefer some privacy, actually.
( LƒÖ`) I think I've gained weight, and I want to die.
( ß -ß) ...Or a blanket...?
( LƒÖ`)...
( LƒŽ`) Mittens.
( Ü-Ü) I think I can see the end of the thread from here.
I think I see your end here...
( LƒÖ`)( Ü-Ü)
...
( LƒÖ`)( Ü-Ü)
Unf!
( LƒÖ( Ü-Ü)
( ÜoÜ) Why, Grandpa!
( LƒÖ`) Hey, any port in a storm, yaknowwhatImean?
( ß -ß) Honestly, I don't. And I don't think I want to.
( Ü-Ü) With a grandpa like you, I wonder what Junior will grow up to be like.
( EƒÖE)
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( EƒÖE) I'm hungry.
( Ü-( LƒÖ`)UH OH I'M BEING ASSIMILATED
( -( LƒÖ`)SHIT THIS COULD BE MY END
(-( LƒÖ`)
(( LƒÖ`)) I AM POWERFUL.
(EÍE) Grandpa, what was life like before the internet?
( Ü-Ü) Here I go! 999 GET!