>>2 was voted Most Likely To Die of a Terminal Spaz Attack in high school.
Ironically enough, >>8 fucked Old Ike Thomas up the ass.
Sadly for >>9, Old Ike Thomas wanted to return the "favor"
Now, this is a story all about how my life got flipped-turned upside down, and I liked to take a minute, just sit right there, I'll tell you how >>10 became the queen of a board called DQN.
Sixty years ago, >>10 worked in what was once his grandfather's greenhouses. Gramps had died a year earlier and Grandma, now in her seventies had been forced to sell to the competition. >>10 got a job with the new owners and mostly worked the range by himself. That summer, they hired a man to help >>10 get the benches ready for the fall planting.
Ike always looked like he was three days from a shave and his whiskers were dirty white, shaded by the brim of his battered felt fedora.
He did not chew tobacco but the corners of his mouth turned down in a way that, at any moment, >>10 expected a trickle of thin, brown juice to creep down his chin. His bushy, brown eyebrows shaded pale, gray eyes.
The old-timer extended his hand, lifted his leg like a dog about to mark a bush and let go the loudest fart >>10 ever heard. The old fellow then winked at >>10, "Ike Thomas is the name and playing pecker's my game."
>>10 thought he said, "Checkers." >>10 was nineteen, green as grass. >>10 said, "I was never much good at that game."
"Now me," said Ike, "I just love jumping men ..."
"I'll bet you do."
"... and grabbing on to their peckers," said Ike.
"I thought we were talking about ..."
"You like jumping old men's peckers?"
>>10 shook his head.
"I reckon we'll have to remedy that." Ike lifted his right leg and let go another tremendous fart. "He said, "We best be getting to work."
That summer of 1941 was a more innocent time. >>10 learned most of the sex he knew from those little eight pager cartoon booklets of comic-page characters going at it. Young men read them in the privacy of an outside john, played with themselves, by themselves and didn't brag about it. Sometimes, we got off with a trusted friend and helped each other out.
Under the greenhouse glass, the temperature some times climbed over the hundred degree mark. >>10 had worked stripped to the waist since April and was as brown as a berry. On only his second day on the job and in the middle of August, Ike wore old fashioned overalls. Those and socks in his high-top work shoes was every stitch he wore. When he bent forward, the bib front billowed out and >>10 could see the white curly hairs on his
chest and belly.
"Me? I just love to eat pussy!" Ike licked his lips from corner to corner then sticking his tongue out far enough that the tip could touch the end of his nose. He said, A man's not a man till he knows first hand, the flavor of a lady's pussy."
"People do that?"
He winked. "Of course the taste of a hard cock ain't to be sneezed at neither. Now you answer me, yes or no. Does a man's cock taste salty or not?"
"I never ..."
"Well, old Ike's willing to let you find out."
"No way."
"Just teasing," said Ike. "But don't give me no sass or I'll show you my ass." He winked. "Might show it to you anyway, if you was to ask."
"Why would I do that?"
"Curiosity, maybe. I'm guessing you never had a good piece of man ass."
"I'm no queer."
"Now don't be getting judgmental. Enjoying what's at hand ain't being queer. It's taking pleasure where you find it with anybody willing." Ike slipped a hand into the side slit of his overalls and I could tell he was fondling and straightening out his cock. "Now I admit I got me a hole that satisfied a few guys."
>>10 swallowed, hard.
Ike winked. "Care to be asshole buddies?"
>>22 spams stickies on /a/ to seem "hip" and "cool"
>>25 goes to 7chan, because it's supposedly so much less retarded than 4chan
>>26 goes to 4-ch, because it's supposedly so much more metal than 7chan
>>30 is the only person on myspace who is not tom's friend.
>>39 is the man without fear, mostly due to the lobotomy he received at the state mental institution.
>>1-44 are morons.
>>46 can't tell if the object is plural or singular.
>>48 has graduated from being a mere tattle-tale into a full time snitch
>>49 missed a small, but not completely insignificant, GET
>>52 is a woman, but pretends she isn't by acting macho
>>54 is willing this thread to fall off the front page of /dqn/.
>>55 knows about 20 different mangas with a sakura chan as the main character.
>>62 is insulting us from the burn unit, after he tried it.
>>65 engages in regular earsex
>>67 posted ads in his paper trying to find someone to have earsex with, but got no responses.
>>68 knew the right paper to advertise in, and got several
>>77 has a fetish for the word "mittens" but, sadly has a morbid fear of the actual thing.
ＶＩＰからきますた
ＶＩＰからきますた
>>87 is a VIPSTAR
>>90 wishes he was 'bold' and 'extreme' instead of 'mild' and 'eccentric'
>>92 wishes 'he' had a penis so he could stick it into every salsa jar in the mexican restaurant 'he' frequents.