( LΦ`) Friends, Romans, Elitists, lend me your DQN.
(EΝE) Grandpa, why is this thread even here?
( LΦ`) Shut the fuck up. Grandpa threads are a tradition to DQN.
(EΝE) Okay, I'll give you that one. But why do people keep posting in this thread?
( LΦ`) It's the internet. Anyone who's here by definiton has nothing better to do but post crap.
( E-E) Especially me.
(@₯ิ-₯ิ) Heh heh... that never gets old.
;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;EΝE;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; Hey, Grandpa!
;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;EΝE;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; I'm your lawn! Stop walking on me!
( E-E) Your ass is grass and I'm the lawnmower.
( LΦ`) Not my lawn. My lawn's pure Kentucky Wgrass.
(@@-@) Kukukukuu. My lawn's all gone to pot, so I smoked it.
( LΦ`) Sigh... might as well introduce yourself so we can see if your gimmick as already spoken for.
(@@-@) I'm Grandson. The 7 year old dumb grandson of a wise, charismatic old man. I ask lots of questions.
(EΝE) Wait, that's my gig.
?@? ?@?@??@? ?@??@? ?@??@? ?@??@? ?@?
?@? ?@@? ?@??@? ?@??@? ?@??@??@? ?@??@? ?@?
(EΝE)(@@-@) QUESTION ASK ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA
?@? ?@??@? ?@??@? ?@??@? ?@????@? ?@??@?@? ?@?? ?@??@? ?@?
?@? ?@??@? ?@???@? ?@??@?@? ?@??@? ?@?? ?@?
@@@@@@@@@@@@@!! ! ! !@!! @! !! ! ! !@!! @! !@!!@!!! ! ! !@!! @! !@!
QUESTION ANSWER MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA (LΦ` )
@@@@@ @@@@ @@ @@!! !@! !@!! ! ! !@!! @! !@! ! ! !@!! @! !@!
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@!! ! ! !!! ! ! !@!! @! !@! @! !!! ! !@!! @! !@!!!! ! ! !@!! @!
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@!! ! ! !@!! @! !@!!!! ! ! !@!! @! !@!!
(EΝE) Being dissatisfied is really getting old, old man.
@@@@^P|
@@@@|@@b
@@@ b @b.@ΘQΘ
@ ,\@@@@_<RMΝL>
@| QQ_j @ b@@m
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@@ @ ^ά)
@@Ί.==Β|_
@@ ( LΦ`) This is my thread, and it will go the way I want it to.
@@ @ ^ά)
@@Ί.==»|_
@@ ( LΦ`) Fuck you, Junior.
@@ @ ^ά)
@@Ί.==K|_
@@@( ί ί) HEIL MITTENS!
@@ @ ^ά)
@@Ί.==K|_
@@@( ί ί)Wait, I want the other hat.
@@ @ ^ά)
@@Ί.==Β|_
@@@( ί ί) HEIL MITTENS!
@@ @ ^ά)
@@Ί.==Β|_
@@@( ί ί) MITTENS!
( LΦ`) Well, that got old fast.
( ₯Ν₯ ) Grandpa, you don't like hats?
@ Θ_Θ@
@i E-E) I prefer cute cat ears.
@ Θ_Θ@
@i E-E) Oh baby.
( LΦ`) I don't know, but it's disrespectful of you, Junior.
(EΝE) Sorry.
(EΝE) Grandpa, where did we come from?
( L(00)`) Being a pig here. Check me out. Oink and stuff.
(EΝE) Hehe snicker that's cute Grandpa, stop that.
(EΝE) Just like you.
@@@ Θ__Θ@ Ώ
@@@i,,LΦ`)c
@@@@Όc))ΝE) ow dammit ow ow ow
@@@@@
i E-E) Predictable Tsukkomi.
(( )ΝE) I'm calling Child Services!
@@@@@ @Θ Θ@@^PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
@@@ @ @ΏίDίj@Child Services.
ccc(Β@@| @ _QQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQ
PPPPPPPP|
. Child Services@@|
. @ @@@@@@@@@ |
@@@@@@@@ CΘ Θ
@@ ___@@@@(EΝE)
@^_ccCb@ _
@@@@@@@@@@Θ
^PPPPPP@PPPPPPPPPPPP
| Grandpa beat me up again.
_QQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQ
@@@@@ @Θ Θ@@^PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
@@@ @ @ΏίDίj@I'm sure he had good reason.
ccc(Β@@| @ _QQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQ
PPPPPPPP|
. Child Services@@|
. @ @@@@@@@@@ |
@@@@@@@@ CΘ Θ
@@ ___@@@@(LΦ`)
@^_ccCb@ _
@@@@@@@@@@Θ
^PPPPPP@PPPPPPPPPPPP
| Hey, old bud! Wanna go out for a drink?
_QQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQ
@@@@@ @Θ Θ@@^PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
@@@ @ @ΏίDίj@Sure. Hey, smack Junior for me.
ccc(Β@@| @ _QQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQ
PPPPPPPP|
. Child Services@@|
. @ @@@@@@@@@ |
((x)ΝE) Child Services, I hate you.
i E-E) snicker
@@@@@@@@ CΘ Θ@ Ώ
@@ ___@@@@(LΦ`)c
@^_ccCΌc))ΝE) ow dammit ow ow ow
@@@@@@@@@@Θ
^PPPPPP@PPPPPPPPPPPP
| Guess what I'm doing right now!
_QQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQ
@@@@@ @Θ Θ@@^PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
@@@ @ @ΏίDίj@Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha haaa!
ccc(Β@@| @ _QQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQ
PPPPPPPP|
. Child Services@@|
. @ @@@@@@@@@ |
@@@ Θ__Θ@ Ώ
@@@i,,LΦ`)c This is the highest point my threads have seen since part 1!
@@@@Όc))ΝE) ow dammit ow ow ow
@@@@@
((x))ΝE) Good Grandpas, don't try this at home. You could get a broken wrist.
@@Φ-Ν
@ Π*L°MΠ Security here, nya.
`(,_Ι
@@@ Θ__Θ@ Ώ
@@@i,,LΦ`)c I'll show you sore butts!!
@@@@Όc@( EΝE) ow dammit ow ow ow
@@@@@@(QQ)Β
( LΦ`) That's for running around without your pants on.
@@Φ-Ν
@ Π*L°MΠ You probably shouldn't be uh hitting him like that I don't think, nya.
`(,_Ι Or is it you ARE supposed to abuse children, nya. It must have been, nya. Grandpa always follows the law, nya.
@@@ Θ__Θ@ Ώ
@@@i,,LΦ`)c-Ν
@@@@Όc@*L°MΠ Ow nya ow nya ow nya ow nya dammit nya
@@@@@@@`(,_Ι
( LΦ`) Fuck yeah, I'm on a roll.
@@@ Θ__Θ@ Ώ
@@@i,,EΝE)c Hah, your back's turned, old fart!
@@@@Όc))Φ`) !
( `ΦL) Ju...nior...
@@@ Θ__Θ
@@@i,,EΝE) Uh, oh, he's italicized now...
@@Φ-Ν
@ Π*L°MΠ Italicized ~nyaa? We do not allow mafioso here, Mobpa ~nyaa!
`(,_Ι
( `ΦL) Go outside and guard the house.
@@Φ-Ν
@ Π*L°MΠ Let the whole place burn the hell down, nya.
`(,_Ι
( LΦ`) * checks insurance *
( LΦ`) I'm good with that.
(₯ิ_₯ิ)Α-̾ The world is in constant flux.
( LΦ`) And what are YOU suppose to be?
(₯ิ_₯ิ)Α-̾ Your place is not to ask questions, and mine is not to answer. I'm just the narrator. Usually I try to have some kind of ironic twist or moral in these things, but.. I got nothing this time.
(EΝE) Ok, so what are YOU suppose to be?
( LΦ`) I'm your grandpa, you brain-damaged short stack.
(EΝE) Since when have I been short stack?
(@₯ิm₯ิ) Short Change got rained on
(@₯ิm₯ิ) By his own .38.
( ί ί) Frankpa!
( ί -ί) Why are you doing Tom Waits now?
(@₯ิm₯ิ) It seemed appropriate, Suzy.
( ί -ί) Suzy?
( ί ί) Wowie ZOWIE!
( LΦ`) Get the fuck out of my thread, you hungry freaks.
( ί ί) Creamcheese creamcheese creamcheese CREAMCHEESE!
(E-E) Mittens, the "I can haz creamcheeze"-shtick is so old that Grandpa first performed it in Salem's town square. The old cat was then promptly burned as a spawn of Satan.
( ί -ί) You are SO out of the loop.
( E-E) Don't get confrontational, Mittens. It doesn't solve anything and only makes you look more like the idiot you actually are.
@@@ Θ__Θ@ Ώ
@@@i,, ί ί)c
@@@@Όc))E-E) ow how ow typical ow
@@@@@
iEΝE j I CAN HAZ CHEEZBURGER?
@@@ Θ__Θ@ Ώ
@@@i,,LΦ`)c I'm not going to stop until you realize how dumb you are!
@@@@Όc))ΝE) ow dammit ow ow ow
@@@@@
iEΝEjGrandpa, when did Something Awful start becoming so sensitive, politically correct and "touchy-feely"?
( LΦ`) When Lowtax lost the fight to Uwe Boll.
( E-E) I just visited Something Awful and thought I had come across some domain parker. The only thing worse is to look like 2ch.
( LΦ`) All sites look like domain parkers when you can't read.
(( )EΝE) Ha! Zing!
( EoE) ...
( E-E) You said you'd never say anything about that!
(@₯ิ-₯ิ) Lady, you deserved it.
(@₯ิ-₯ิ) I don't know what I saw in you.
( E-E) Mom 'n' Dad made us get married. Family tradition.
@@@@@(_@ Ώ___Ώ
@@@@@@ M(:::ίί::) HYYYAAAAA 495get-jutsu!
@@@@@@@_@ Ζ_j
@@@@@@@^@@@@_
@@@@@@@΅PPP_,)
( LΦ`) Congratulations!!!!
(EΝE) Yeah 495get! Way to go!
(@₯ิ-₯ิ) Awesome!
( ί ί) That was the best get I've ever seen!!
Φ Junior, have you seen the rest of my face?
(EΝE) Yeah, it's right down here.
)`( L
Φ can I have it back?