( ´ω`) hello kids!

　　　　　　　　　　　　　/＾/::/ |__
　　　　　　　　　　　　 /＾/::/ /_⊃
　　　　＿＿＿＿＿_　__/＾/::/＾/⊃
　　　|￣　/::/ | ￣ ￣ ||γ〜〜/::/ |
|||‐‐‐‐/::/ ‐＼ 　⊂二/::/ γ　 /
　　|＿＿/::/＿＼＿||{　/::/ーー/
　　　　　　￣￣￣￣￣￣

　　　　　　　　 ∧ ∧,〜
　　　　　　　　( （⌒￣ `ヽ　　　　＿
　　　　　　　　　 ＼　 ＼　`ー'"´, -'⌒ヽ　Grandpa: Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu:
　　　　　　　　　/∠＿,ノ　　　 / 　　　　Amakakeru Ryu no Hirameki.
　　　　　　　　 /（　ノ　ヽ､＿/´ 　＼　　　　　　　　
　　　　　　　､（ 'ﾉ（　　　　　く　　　　 `ヽ､　　　　
　　　　　　／`　 　＼＿＿＿_>＼＿＿_ノ　　　　
　　　　 ／　　　　　　 /＿_〉　　　　 `､＿_>　　 　
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　 　　

（ ｀ハ´）Fool, using one of your strongest techniques right off the bat.

(・∀・）Even I'm not that stupid, Grandpa!

( ´ω`) But it looked cool..

( ・ω・) It did, actually.

( ´ω`) You have an error in your SQL syntax. Check the manual that corresponds to your MySQL server version for the right syntax to use near '' at line 1

(・∀・）wow grandpa, thanks that you let me know!

( ｀ハ´）You know, -I- should be involved in this battle. After all, I am Grandpa's greatest opponent.

( ・ω・) Then, you're my enemy.

( ｀ハ´）HAAAAAAA

( ・ω・) UWAAAAAAA

　　　　　/＿／＿／￣＼_|/　 　 　　　　　 ＼　 ＼＿＼
　　　　　 ＾ /＿＿_＿|　_＿ ＼　　　 　 　 　　　＼.　|　 　|
　　　　　　 |( ｀ハ´）＿＿＿|　　 　　　　　　　　＼|＿／
　　　　　CRUSHED
　　　A...ah, damnit.

　 　　 　　　　　 ＿　 　 　　 ＿＿_ ∧∧　 　　　　　＿　　 　　　　 人人人人人人人人人人
　 　 　 　　／⌒＼ ＼ 　 　 〔〔 |Ξ (,,・ω・)つ　／⌒＾＼＼　 　　＜　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　＞
　 　 　 　 /／⌒＼ |◎| 　 ＿/ ||Ξ/ つ　 / ／⌒＼|◎|　　　＜ How strong is that exoskeleton of yours?!
　 　 　 ／　　　　　）|日|＼/__＼|／￣￣￣￣＼　 _____.|日|＼_　 ＜　　　　　　　　　　　　　　＞
　 　 　/　　●　　 ＿＿_　 ＼|／ 　 　 　 ●　　●/＼　￣＼__〉　　∨∨∨∨∨∨∨∨∨∨
　 　／　　　　　 Y　 　 　Y　）ヽ Y　　Y　　　　　　 ＼..＼ ＿/＾~　　　　　　　　　　　　　　
　 　| ▼　 　 　　 |　 　　　| /. ））.|　　 |　　　　 　 ▼ |／＼＼ 　 　 　　　　　　　　　　　
　 　|人＿＿ノ⌒|　　　 　|/ノノノ＼__人　　　、＿人| 　 　＼＼　
　 　　　 　 　 /￣ ＼＿＿|　 ||　￣/目＞、 ＿＿＿ノ＼. 　 /　　　　　
　 　 　　　 　/　　　/ 　./|__＿||_／￣／{三|三|三｝|　 　 ＼/　
　 　　　　　 /＿＿/＿./　＼＿|ロ／￣{三|三|三｝ロ|　 　 　 　
　　　　　 ／　　　/ 　|/　　　　　〉−−−−−〈＿　　　　　　　
　 　 　 /======/ 　 |　 　／￣￣￣|＾＾ ● ＾＾ ●）＼
　 　 ／~/⌒|＼.||　 /　 　|￣￣＿＿|＿　 　▼ 　| ￣|
　 （￣（）|⌒|　）||　/　 　 /　 　/ /ミ三＼＿人__/三{.|
　 （￣（）|＿|/　||/ 　 　 /　 　/ / / 　￣/|:::::|::::|　 　＼
　　（￣（）／)/￣ 　 　 /　 　 / / / 　　./ |:::::|::::|＼　 　＼
　 　＾（￣）/ 　 　 　 　/＿＿/_/ / 　 　/　 ＼__/　 ＼　　 ＼
　 　　￣＾　 　 　 　 　 　 　/＾＾ /　　　/　　　＼ 　　　＼ |￣￣|
　 　 　　　 　 　　 　 　 　 / 　 /　　　/ 　 　 　 ＼ 　　　/　 　 |
　 　 　　　 　 　　 　 　 __/三|/　　　/ 　 　 　 　　>三三＼___/
　 　 　　　 　 　　 　 ／　＼／￣￣〉　 　 　 　　 /＼　　/　　/
　 　 　　　 　 　　 ／＼　 　|＿＿/|　 　 　 　　 /　　|　/　　/
　 　 　　　 　 　／　　　|　/　 　 　/　 　 　 　　/　 　|_/　__/
　 　 　　　 　／　　　　 |/＿＿/　 　 　 　　 /　　　 /￣ /
　 　 　　　 /　　　 ＿_/　 　 　/　 　 　　　　 /|　　　/＿_/
　　　　　　/　　　 ＿_/　 　 　/　　　　　　　/|　　　/＿_/
　　　　　 /　 　／　　￣￣| /　　　　　　　〈　＼／__〈/
　　　　　/＿／＿／￣＼_|/　 　 　　　　　 ＼　 ＼＿＼
　　　　　 ＾ /＿＿_＿|　_＿ ＼　　　 　 　 　　　＼.　|　 　|
　　　　　　 |( ｀ハ´）＿＿＿|　　 　　　　　　　　＼|＿／
Darkpa: Grandpa, we're not tools of the government or anyone else! Fighting was the only thing... the only thing I was good at, but... At least I always fought for what I believed in... Grandpa... farewell.

　　　　　/＿／＿／￣＼_|/　 　 　　　　　 ＼　 ＼＿＼
　　　　　 ＾ /￣　 　|　_＿ ＼　　　 　 　 　　　＼.　|　 　|
　　　　　　 |＿＿＿/＿＿＿|　　 　　　　　　　　＼|＿／
　　　　　　　squish

( ´ω`) DARKPAAAAAAA!!!!

( ・ω・) Foolish man...He begged for death, and it found him. You see? You can't save anyone. Not even yourself...DIE!

(・∀・）That was dramatic, but it made no sense. Why was Darkpa Clonepa's enemy in >>745?

( ・ω・) Well, you see, -I- want to be the one to put an end to Grandpa myself. I won't let anyone interfere with that.

( ´ω`) Oh, and we were also taking lines from Metal Gear Solid, of course. Just for reference.

(・∀・）tl;dr I see.

( ´ω`) Anyways, we need some more music. Clonepa already picked something, Junior is an idiot, and Darkpa is dead. That leaves me and my worthless son... any ideas, jackass?

( ・ー・） ....no.....

( ・ー・） Actually, if you're bored, you could just shoot the robot with this stinger missile launcher I've got here.

( ｀ハ´） I'm not quite dead yet.

( ｀ハ´） It just so happens that I am only MOSTLY dead. There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead.

(・∀・）ARE YOU maybe UNDEAD?!

( ´ω`)Stop lying, Darkpa. You'll be stone dead in a moment.

( ｀ハ´） rock solid

( ｀ハ´） Really, I'm not quite dead yet.

　　　　　/＿／＿／￣＼_|/　 　 　　　　　 ＼　 ＼＿＼
　　　　　 ＾ /＿＿_＿|　_＿ ＼　　　 　 　 　　　＼.　|　 　|
　　　　　　 |( ｀ハ´）＿＿＿|　　 　　　　　　　　＼|＿／
　　　　　　.........

( ・ω・) I made everything but the fist out of cardboard.

( ;´ω`) C...cardboard?!? ALL HOPE IS LOST NOW!

(・∀・）Holy crap, Clonepa, you should have told me you liked to build robots with cardboard! I got a few myself - none as cool as yours is though!

( ・ω・) We'll discuss this later, Junior. I'm busy watching Grandpa die of wakabamark.

´ω`)!

ω`

ω

.

(・∀・）Grandpa? Grandpa?!!? GRANNDDDPAAAASNNAAAAAAAKKEEEEE!!

( ・ω・) So, it's all over.

( ｀ハ´）My nemesis has been vanquished. What should I do now..?

（・_・。）...

　　　　|┃三 Slam!
　　　　|┃　　　　 ＠＠＠
　　　　|┃　≡　 ＠#、＠ 　
＿＿__.|ミ＼＿＿（ 　 ﾉ`） 　I don't remember why I even married him!
　　　　|┃=＿＿||ヽ ^ /|＼ Really though, I don't. Anyone know why?

(・∀・） His money?

( ・ω・) His home?

( ｀ハ´） His power?

（・_・。） ...his inner beauty...?

G R A N D P A 2 . 0　-　E P I L O G U E

After Grandpa abruptly vanished from the world, everything went into chaos shortly thereafter.

（ 　 ﾉ`）Grandma quickly passed away for unknown reasons.
（・_・。）Fiancee was hired by a underground DQN organization as a female assassin, and successfully killed thousands of DQNs, but died in battle with Junior.
( ｀ハ´）Darkpa, after living a long life of unsuccessful revenge, had no idea what to do at first of Grandpa's demise. He led a huge mass of DQNs to total genocide. Darkpa's existance was finally put to an end by an effort made by Junior.
(・∀・）Junior, after having asked thousands of questions to Grandpa, was severely devastated the most. He trained his body and mind to compare to that of Grandpa's prime days. He successfully killed Fiancee in a heated battle, but lost his arm in the process. With one arm, he then rode to destroy Darkpa, and did so by using Grandpa's legendary 'DQN Ultima Lv99 Death' that he finally mastered at his own last ounce of strength. Junior died, hoping that DQN would seek to a new light..a new hope. He thought of his Grandpa one last time, and faded to nothingness.

(・ー・）I've come to discuss the shaping of a new DQN.

(*ﾟーﾟ) What do you have in mind?

(・ー・）Even though my own son and father hated my guts, we must not forget what they've done for DQN. After the amazing Darkpa saga was put to an end with Junior's effort, the world was shining with a new ray of light. This ray of light shall prosper, and bring forth a new garden, a new DQN. I propose that the entity 'Grandpa' be born again, as well as 'Junior'. I also propose that 'Fiancee' and 'Darkpa' be brought back again.

(*ﾟーﾟ) What of Grandma?

(・ー・）She's a stinky old hag that deserved to die anyway.

(*ﾟーﾟ) I agree. She took my love away from me. But yes, I will vow to recreate DQN and implement the deceased characters of the Grandpa thread, bring them back to life again, and start anew. DQN, hun, you know what to do.

(（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) DDDDddddddDddDdDDDDDDDDDUUUUUUUUUuuUUUUUuuuRRRRRRRrRrrrRR!!!!!!!!

( ・ω・) hello kids!

( ´ω`) Grandpa, what was life like before the internet?

---

(*ﾟーﾟ) Er, wait a minute, something's not right. What happened to Clonepa when Grandpa died?

(・ー・）I...don't know.

(（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) DDDDUUUURRUURURRRR?!?

( ・ω・) Ahahaha! You'll learn that your powers of reshaping the world have been reclaimed by ME! Now I'll control the Grandpa thread the way -I- want to!

(*ﾟーﾟ) !!!

(・∀・)y━･ Grandpa, can I just tl;dr that whole thing?

(・ー・） ...okay, you know what? I'm getting tired of this. First you wanted me to help you write a book, then it ended up being really stupid, and now you're just going to tl;dr?

(・ー・） You two just go bother Grandpa or something already, I'm going out for a drink.

(・∀・) ...

( ・ω・) ...

(・∀・) Grandpa, why is everyone trying to make a story here?

( ´ω`) It's just false wisdom. Don't imagine, learn!

(・∀・) Grandpa, is there life on mars?

( ´ω`) Kid, there isn't even intelligent life on Earth.

(・∀・) Grandpa, will we ever find the single quark?

( ´ω`) You're to one who lost it! Now get back out into the yard and look for it!

( ・ω・) Grandpa, what did you get us for Christmas?

( ´ω`) Well I've only purchased one gift so far: contraceptives, so mistakes like Junior don't happen again!
Σ(；ー；）...that hurt...
(;;`Д´) ! I'm taking your present back to the store Grandpa!

( ´ω`) Oh you actually thought of someone other than yourself this year? What'd you buy for me?

(・∀・) You'll find out on Christmas~!

(・∀・) What was christmas like back in your day, Grandpa?

( ´ω`) When I was a lad, Christmas meant getting a stocking full of oranges and Brazil nuts. And we were happy to have 'em!

(・∀・) Do you believe in Santa Claus, Grandpa?

( ´ω`) No. You?

(・∀・) Gee, I was hoping for a story about him being one of your old friends.

(；ー；） I hate you, Grandpa!

( ´ω`) I've been around the world, Junior, and I've seen a lot of strange things. But that doesn't mean I've seen everything.

(・∀・) Have you seen Russia grandpa?

( ´ω`) Even better, I've seen Soviet Russia. He was a silly man.

(・∀・) You don't post much, do you grandpa?

( ´ω`) Nope.

( ´ω`) The key is lurking. With lurking comes wisdom. Lurk more, sonny!

(・∀・) Hay Grandpa, have you played Final Fantasy 4? The original SNES cart, I mean?

(・∀・) I'm playing the GBA version, and I was wondering if you knew about any differences between the versions?

( ´ω`) Did you just curse at me sonny?

　　　┌――――――――┐
　　 　｜.B１�@�A�B�C�D�E.　|
　 　　｜�F�G�H�I�J�K�L�M｜
　 　　└――――――――┘
　　　　 ┌―――┬―――┐
　　　　　|　　　　　 |　　　　　 |┌──────┐
　　　　　|　　　　　 |　　　　　 |│Out of service│
　　　　　|　　　　　 |　　　　　 |└──────┘
　 age 　∧＿∧ 　　／￣￣￣￣￣￣
　　▲C<丶｀∀´> ＜　comon comon！
　　▽ ＼　　　　）　| ＼＿＿＿＿＿＿
　sage　｜Ｏ　　|＿|＿＿＿|
　　　　　〈＿_〈＿〉

(;;・Д・) G-grandpa! Someone's using our elevator!

( ´ω`) Sonny, I have to say but... You are a stupid fuck. Why do you sage something already on top.

(・∀・) For this.

( ´ω`) Sonny, I have to say but...I'm W.T.Snacks.

(・Д・) Grandpa, didn't you know? Nobody pays attention to the email field!

(・∀・) By the way, you've been calling me "Sonny" alot recently... could you have forgotten my name?

( ´ω`) Ergh...

(・∀・) Junior, Ju. Ni. Our. Get that old man?

(・∀・) Grandpa, I fucking hate you. I hate you so goddamn much.

(・∀・) >:(

( ´ω`) DQN spotted!

(・`_´・) Wtf?

(・∀・) Sorry about that, I was feeling emo.

(・∀・)ノ凸 Anyways, here's your medicine, Grandpa!

( ´ω`) No use..... I'm dying junior.

(・∀・) Fine, FINE! I'll ask you more questions!

(・∀・) Grandpa, were you on usenet during Eternal September? I mean, early on.

( ´ω`) "Early on?" I thought that was yesterday. Or maybe I get it mixed up with Black September?

*
/　＼
( ´ω`) Ho ho ho, meerrrry christmas, junior!!

(・∀・) Grandpa's Santa?!?

(・∀・) ZOMG PRESENTZ PLZ

( ´ω`) Have you been a good DQN this year?

(・∀・) Yes, Santa!

(・∀・) No, Santa!

(・∀・) Yes, Santa!

( ´ω`) That´s it! No christmas presents for you.

(・∀・) Noooooooooo! Santa!

(・Д・;）o O ( Christmas is over... and i still haven't gotten any presents..!)

( ´ω`) But you did get a present... you got me!

(・Д・;）o O ( ....... )

(ﾟДﾟ) o O (J-just now.. Did he read my mind?)

(;・∀・) um... Hey Grandpa! We're almost at 1000!

     Nirvana awaits!

( ´ω`) If I live that long.

( ´ω`) Junior, I have to tell you...I think I might finally pass away at >>1000 GET.

( ´ω`) You see, its come to my attention that a lot of the posts here are..interesting, but not as groundbreaking as the previous Grandpa thread. The lesser quality of your questions, and the less energy I have to stay alive.

( ´ω`) Some DQN may come along to make Grandpa 3.0, but the same Grandpa may not be there to answer your stupid questions.

(・∀・) Guess it's time for me to start havin' kids!

(・∀・) Grandpa, will we ever make it too >>1000 ?

( ´ω`) We already did.

( ´ω`) Junior, what self-respecting woman would like a DQN such as yourself?
(・∀・) Fiance---
( ´ω`) No. She was a figment of your imagination...

(・∀・) B-but she's really real!

( ´ω) |・＿・|<丶｀∀´> ( ｀ハ´）（ 　 ﾉ）( ・ω・)(*ﾟーﾟ)(・ー・）(（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）) No, she isn't, Junior.

（・_・。）i'm really not real. see look, i'm fading away now.
（・_
・
.
bink

(・∀・) .........

(;∀;) WWAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!

(・∀・) W-was it all just my imagination? E-even Grandpa?!

( ´ω`) No.

(・∀・) What is the Matrix?

( ´ω`) This is the matrix.

──
─────── ― -　--
─── /⌒ヽ　　────────
￣￣　 / ,ﾍ　 　　　　　￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣　　　,　”　'　‐ , 　　　　　　　
￣￣　i　.i　＼ （　´ω`ヽ, 　　___,, __ ＿ ,, - _―" ’.　　'　・,　　’・　　　 　∧＿∧ 　
──　ヽ勿　　ヽ,__＾ 　 j　 i〜""　　　　 ＿ ― ＿: i ∴”_　∵,　　　　　　(　　　　)
＿＿＿＿＿＿ 　 ヽ,,　/　/　__,,, -- "" ─ "ー ・, ；　; - 、・　　 r=-,/⌒　　〜ヽ
───────　 ヽﾉ　ﾉ,イ　　─── ― -　　　　　 　 　　 　i　ｙ 　ﾉ'　ﾉi　j |
───────　 /　/,. 　ヽ, 　──　　　　　　　　　　　　 　　 i,,___ノ　　　/／
＿＿＿＿＿＿ 　 丿 ﾉ　ヽ,__,ﾉ　＿＿＿ ＿　_ _　　　　　 　　 　　,'　　　　ゝi
　　　　　　　　　　 j　 i　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　 　 ／　　　y　ノ
＿＿＿＿＿ 　 　巛i〜　＿＿＿＿ ＿　　　　　　　　　　　　　/ 　　 ／〜／
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　 　　i　 　<　/

(・∀・) I expected a bit more 3D, but I guess that's okay.

(・∀・) Grandpa, how do you like your tea?

( ´ω`) I like my tea ZA WARUDO!!!!

(・∀・)

( ´ω`) Time has stopped.

(・∀・) |・＿・| <丶｀∀´> ( ｀ハ´）（ 　 ﾉ）( ・ω・) (*ﾟーﾟ) (・ー・） (（●）ﾄｪｪｪｲ（●）)

( ´ω`) Where am I?

( ´ω`) Oh, right, time stopped. Now how do I turn this thing back on...?