ITT we solve the question above us II. (999)

1 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4723 15:54

What happened to 1000get?!

801 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4944 15:33

My new single. It's called "Doobaroo on a boat in the Sea Sea Sea~~Umi Umi~Mar STAR!~!"I wrote it myself.

Would you like to hear it?

802 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4944 17:05


Where did I leave my car keys?

803 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4944 17:53

They're in the hamper in the pocket of the pants you wore yesterday.

Is my dog finally getting enough cheese in his diet?

804 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4944 19:19

Only if he shits bricks.

Has anybody ever beaten Goatse in an asshole contest?

805 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4945 14:59

I'm so not going there.

What song should I use for my cell phone?

806 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4945 15:09

"I hate myself and want to die, because it's winter" by DQN-kun. Duh.

But which remix?

807 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4945 16:29

"All Alone for Ramadan." It's the best of them all.

Why shouldn't we annex Canada?

808 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4945 17:51


809 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4945 20:04

That's not much of a decent reason why Ontario shouldn't become the 51st state, now, is it?

So... that being said, What should we do with Quebec?

810 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4945 20:55

There's only one proper response: "BLOW IT ALL UP!"

Which had better songs: Guitar Hero 1 or 2?

811 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4945 21:58

Beatmania IIDX of course.

Why does Pop'n Music suck so much?

812 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4946 03:39

But where would you run to in event of a draft?

813 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4946 11:52

Don't register to vote is all I can say.

814 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4946 14:52

Why did the last two people in this thread not follow the theme?

815 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4947 01:38

Because, they're DQN.

Is >>814 ironic?

816 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4948 10:54

It's elitist humour. You're not supposed to explain it.

Is the Elitist Superstructure above or below the Zionist Conspiracy in the hierarchy?

817 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4948 11:14

It depends which hierarchy your talking about. In terms of the relative existence-onism, we rank way higher, but on the ladder of arrogance, we rank way higher as well.

How many days have September, April, Junior, Grandpanember?

818 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4948 19:34

As many as Febluberry *4.

What contributes more to global warming, cow farts or beer belches?

819 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4948 20:18

I think DQN posts contribute more than both combined.

How much time does the planet have left before everything explodes?

820 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4948 20:55

Two weeks.

How long will it have if the six of us stop posting?

821 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4948 21:28

Three weeks.

Does anyone else have an escape plan?

822 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4948 22:37

Two weeks.

Does understanding that answer make you a genius?

823 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4948 23:48

Hell yes. (I don't understand that answer. Neither did you.)

If the Elitist Superstructure and the Gnomes of Zürich had a fight, who'd win?

824 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4949 01:37


Why is my cat digging frantically in the litterbox and yowling?

825 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4949 02:53

Invisible mice in the litterbox.

What is the last digit of pi?

826 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4949 03:00


Why does my cat keep reaching under the door and grabbing things I put near her? Does she want something in particular?

827 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4949 05:42

LSD in the cat food. (that's why she does it, that's not what she wants) What she wants is a hug.

What is it about cats that makes us love them so? Why is a cat fine too?

828 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4949 13:52

Because some of us cannot afford to be choosey.

That being said, what is the best way to give a cat a bath?

829 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4949 15:19

Well, the first step is to write your will.

What comes after that?

830 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4949 15:20

The good old bathtub, dunk, chickenwire method works pretty well.

How come these w's always keep carrying out fnord?

831 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4949 20:34

Because all things can be carried out and are wwwwwwwwwww.

Linux or Windows?

832 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4949 21:23

U noob, Mac of course.

What was the question again?

833 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4950 01:35

Way to pre-empt the thread structure there, dude.

Why do some people insist on posting ITT if they only have a question, or an answer, but not both?

834 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4950 02:18

Because it's always September, somewhere on the net.

What's this?

835 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4950 03:45

>>834 A shitty question.

Why does my arm itch?

836 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4950 05:20

Because you forgot to scratch it.

Should I avoid the itch to stay at my computer and go to bed?

837 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4950 05:27

No. You'll sleep better if you stay at the computer until you're sleepy.

838 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4950 05:27

Oops, forgot to ask a question.

Why does the porridge bird lay his egg in the air?

839 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4950 06:50

To train the babies to fly early on.

Why didn't my mom throw me out of the plane?

840 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4950 10:24

because she loves you

Why did my mom throw me out of the plane?

841 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4950 12:28

because she loves you

how did you get those pictures on the computer

842 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4950 12:30

They came with it, I swear!

Should I take up badminton?

843 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4950 12:43

No. If it were worthwhile it would be called "goodminton."

If free will is an illusion, then who's that who says "who's that" when I say "who's that?"

844 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4950 12:50

It could be someone else, or it could be you. But ultimately that someone else is controlled by you. Unless it was really someone else.

Was "Free Willy" a flap in the UK?

845 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4950 15:24

It did ok, but it did cause a lot of sniggering and queues of gay magicians.

Are there any reverse examples? For instance, does, say "Love Actually" mean "Do me up the shitter" in Amerikkka?

846 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4952 17:39

Well, just to drop an example, it is said that "gay magic" actually refers to elaborate rituals performed in connection to homosexuality, not necessarily by homosexuals themselves, and in contrast to the usual meaning of "magic", which refers to sleight of hand performed on-stage.

Why isn't biting the head off a chicken a meme?

847 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4952 17:47

Because the concept is not easily communicable through textual means.

Why was WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY a successful meme?

848 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4952 18:51

>>847 because it's the most important incantation in the field of gay magic.

If you were a master of gay magic, would you use it to attract men or women?

849 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4952 20:22

I'd use it to summon the ghost of Liberace. That's what I'd do. I'd be the baddest homosexual necromancer around.

What's the worst insult of them all? No really, I mean the worst.

850 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4952 20:44

Your Mom!

Should I switch to Linux, or stick with an operating system that works?

851 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4952 21:03

It never got better than MSDOS 5.0

Can I have a pony?

852 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4952 21:42

Not unless you finish your vegetables.

What should we have for dinner tonight, honey?

853 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4953 08:49

Six tons of vegetables. >>851 deserves a pony if he finishes that.

Which makes me wonder: If you could hybrid vegetables with ponies, which vegetable would be the most practical and why?

854 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4954 00:00

The guava. They are the superior choice simply because the result would be named poguva.

What will we do now that DQN has started on its slow slide into obscurity and suck?

855 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4954 00:06

We briefly shake our heads in shame, but do not dwell on the past and instead look towards a brighter future, possibly a future somewhere else.

Will September 5000 be a turning point for DQN?

856 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4954 01:07

No, but it'll be on the O RLY? Factor.

Is DQN fair and balanced?

857 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4955 11:24

No, it is mostly composed of slanties, niggers, chuweros and inbred trailer trash with a grossly enlarged right cerebral hemisphere.

Is Squeeks feeling better now?

858 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4955 15:04

After rallying, he's suffered a setback and the bonitis has spread to his major organ.

After Squeeks is gone, there will only be four posters left. Will that be enough to sustain 4-ch?

859 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4955 21:10

One of us will have to make like a cell and multiply asexually to make up for the loss.

How much genetic material does it take to sustain a viable DQN?

860 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4957 02:30

About as much as what gets shot out during one masturbation session after 3 weeks of non-fapping.

When will there be a large number of Chinese girls with huge boobs?

861 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4957 14:00

Never. They will all be replaced by a chinese number of large girls with large boobs.

862 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4958 18:25

No question? Intolerable! I shall provide one.

How many days can one go without DQN before life becomes meaningless?

863 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4958 23:16

I think I could last at least until the end of September.

What should I do about this crushing sense of ennui?

864 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4958 23:40

Find an engaging, preferably outdoor hobby and replace Internet-lounging with it.

Why didn't that work for me?

865 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4959 00:30

You're too self aware.

Over eons, does even death die?

866 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4959 01:53

Stop reading Lovecraft, moron.

The only thing worth your attention is The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya.

How does I became Koreans?

867 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4959 06:57

Eat many cat.

How do I keep my mittens from shrinking in the wash?

868 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4959 10:26

Upgrade them to maximum level using a rainbow diamond.

Who came first, Rei or Grandpa ?

869 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4959 13:39

Grandpa fissioned off from the first amoeba. Rei was cloned from Lilith, who came into being on the sixth day. Grandpa farts dust; Rei is more like vanilla. Grandpa wins.

What attacks do mittens give you when they hit max?

870 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4959 16:12

They hit Max in the face with little smek smek noises and confuse him.

Why do the fanboys obsess over Rei when the non-jailbait Eva girls (by which I mean Misato and Ritsuko) are so much hotter?

871 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4959 18:38

Because Rei doesn't fight and scream when you rape her, she only asks you to move.

Are redheads sexier than bluetops?

872 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4959 22:25

It's not tops you need to be looking at, it's the bottoms!

You agree with me that red is better, then?

873 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4959 22:33

No, generally when I am given a color choice I will pick orange or blue. Except with pencils. Pencils look snazzy in red.

Is it just me or is your hairline receding?

874 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4960 02:31

You're the one receding; my hairline is standing still.

What's the coolest way to confess to a girl in one sentence?

875 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4960 03:03

Love notes written in menstrual blood, respectively.

How can I enlarge my penis?

876 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4960 16:46

Bare hands do not deliver enough energy. Carry out masturbation using steel gloves (mittens are the forbidden thing, so please refrain from using them) until satisfied. By acknowledging this technique you also certify you will not hold the elitist superstructure responsible if you break your penis and/or the gloves as a result of using too much metal for one hand.

What is >>1000 about ?

877 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4960 18:49

>>1000 is the celebration of new life

How do I kill Frigid Onanoko?

878 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4960 19:26

With plenty of friggin onani, ok.

What is orange-colored, flies through the air like a thrown orange and is round like an orange?

879 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4960 19:56

I'm thinking "an orange" would satisfy all those requirements, and you didn't actually specify that it had to be something else, so that's my final answer.

Who ate all the Cracklin' Oat Bran?

880 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4960 22:37

Conan O'Brien

Did Rei get fired from McDonald's for refusing to smile?

881 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4961 01:58


How do I shot web?

882 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4961 05:17

Stop posting.

Where did all these idiots come from?

883 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4961 05:22

4chan, probably.

How do we exterminate them?

884 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4961 09:49

Lighter, hairspray, good aim.

What is the meaning of life?

886 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4961 12:43

Love is over, baby don't love me, no more.

Why aren't you into things?

887 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4961 19:10

      ○。 |  .|   ヽ /。/
        <|  .|   |ノ/ /  ・  Go away, GO AWAY!!!
   。・    | 丶    ヽ./
         ヽ     ヽ          Why do you have to ask such difficult things?
          \     \
            \     \
             /    丿\
            /   /\  \
           /  /   \  .\
          /  /      \  ヽ
丿⌒ ̄ ̄ ̄⌒   /  ノ⌒ ̄ ̄ ̄   丿
|_つ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄    |_つ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄

888 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4961 21:08

I'm not into the whole asking easy questions thing.

How do I get these damned bugs out from under my skin?

889 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4961 21:28

You've got Morgellons Syndrome. Congratulations.

Why do I feel dizzy right now?

890 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4961 22:20

You have played too much Guilty Gear and now think you're feeling up Dizzy.

If I feel up Bridget, what will I discover?

891 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4961 22:26

Please refer to this thread :

Is there a future ?

892 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4962 09:48


Who are you and why are you stalking me?

893 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4962 14:30

George 'Big Ears' Bush and it's none of your fucking business.

Should we bomb the hell out of Iran?

894 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4962 16:32

Only with gay bombs.

What is the best hair color to go with my skin tone?

895 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4962 17:53

Do a Britney and shave it all off. Goes with everything.

Why don't you turn off your computer and go for a walk for once?

896 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4962 19:09

Walks are for people with girlfriends.

Where can I hide the mittens to guarantee that nobody ever talks about them again?

897 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4962 21:04

In Kindness-san's backyard.

Is there actually any call for translators from dutch to english?

898 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4962 21:35

Only in the pornography business. And they can't import dutch pr0ns to english-speaking areas due to prudery.

Why do wire clotheshangers always become tangled up when more than one are placed in the same out-of-sight spot?

899 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4962 21:45

The answer is (and always will be, to every question) 42

Why do all the Grand Theft Auto sequels have at least 5 continuity errors?

900 Name: ⊂二二二( ^ω^)二二二⊃ : 1993-09-4962 22:10


Is 42 funny?

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