What happened to 1000get?!
Your Mom!
Should I switch to Linux, or stick with an operating system that works?
It never got better than MSDOS 5.0
Can I have a pony?
Not unless you finish your vegetables.
What should we have for dinner tonight, honey?
Six tons of vegetables. >>851 deserves a pony if he finishes that.
Which makes me wonder: If you could hybrid vegetables with ponies, which vegetable would be the most practical and why?
The guava. They are the superior choice simply because the result would be named poguva.
What will we do now that DQN has started on its slow slide into obscurity and suck?
We briefly shake our heads in shame, but do not dwell on the past and instead look towards a brighter future, possibly a future somewhere else.
Will September 5000 be a turning point for DQN?
No, but it'll be on the O RLY? Factor.
Is DQN fair and balanced?
No, it is mostly composed of slanties, niggers, chuweros and inbred trailer trash with a grossly enlarged right cerebral hemisphere.
Is Squeeks feeling better now?
After rallying, he's suffered a setback and the bonitis has spread to his major organ.
After Squeeks is gone, there will only be four posters left. Will that be enough to sustain 4-ch?
One of us will have to make like a cell and multiply asexually to make up for the loss.
How much genetic material does it take to sustain a viable DQN?
About as much as what gets shot out during one masturbation session after 3 weeks of non-fapping.
When will there be a large number of Chinese girls with huge boobs?
Never. They will all be replaced by a chinese number of large girls with large boobs.
No question? Intolerable! I shall provide one.
How many days can one go without DQN before life becomes meaningless?
I think I could last at least until the end of September.
What should I do about this crushing sense of ennui?
Find an engaging, preferably outdoor hobby and replace Internet-lounging with it.
Why didn't that work for me?
You're too self aware.
Over eons, does even death die?
Stop reading Lovecraft, moron.
The only thing worth your attention is The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya.
How does I became Koreans?
Eat many cat.
How do I keep my mittens from shrinking in the wash?
Upgrade them to maximum level using a rainbow diamond.
Who came first, Rei or Grandpa ?
Grandpa fissioned off from the first amoeba. Rei was cloned from Lilith, who came into being on the sixth day. Grandpa farts dust; Rei is more like vanilla. Grandpa wins.
What attacks do mittens give you when they hit max?
They hit Max in the face with little smek smek noises and confuse him.
Why do the fanboys obsess over Rei when the non-jailbait Eva girls (by which I mean Misato and Ritsuko) are so much hotter?
Because Rei doesn't fight and scream when you rape her, she only asks you to move.
Are redheads sexier than bluetops?
It's not tops you need to be looking at, it's the bottoms!
You agree with me that red is better, then?
No, generally when I am given a color choice I will pick orange or blue. Except with pencils. Pencils look snazzy in red.
Is it just me or is your hairline receding?
You're the one receding; my hairline is standing still.
What's the coolest way to confess to a girl in one sentence?
Love notes written in menstrual blood, respectively.
How can I enlarge my penis?
>>875
Bare hands do not deliver enough energy. Carry out masturbation using steel gloves (mittens are the forbidden thing, so please refrain from using them) until satisfied. By acknowledging this technique you also certify you will not hold the elitist superstructure responsible if you break your penis and/or the gloves as a result of using too much metal for one hand.
What is >>1000 about ?
>>1000 is the celebration of new life
How do I kill Frigid Onanoko?
With plenty of friggin onani, ok.
What is orange-colored, flies through the air like a thrown orange and is round like an orange?
I'm thinking "an orange" would satisfy all those requirements, and you didn't actually specify that it had to be something else, so that's my final answer.
Who ate all the Cracklin' Oat Bran?
Conan O'Brien
Did Rei get fired from McDonald's for refusing to smile?
Yes.
How do I shot web?
4chan, probably.
How do we exterminate them?
Lighter, hairspray, good aim.
What is the meaning of life?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Meaning_of_life
What is Love?
Love is over, baby don't love me, no more.
Why aren't you into things?
/⌒|___/⌒ヽ
○。 | .| ヽ /。/
<| .| |ノ/ / ・ Go away, GO AWAY!!!
。・ | 丶 ヽ./
ヽ ヽ Why do you have to ask such difficult things?
\ \
\ \
/ 丿\
/ /\ \
/ / \ .\
/ / \ ヽ
丿⌒ ̄ ̄ ̄⌒ / ノ⌒ ̄ ̄ ̄ 丿
|_つ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ |_つ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄
I'm not into the whole asking easy questions thing.
How do I get these damned bugs out from under my skin?
You've got Morgellons Syndrome. Congratulations.
Why do I feel dizzy right now?
You have played too much Guilty Gear and now think you're feeling up Dizzy.
If I feel up Bridget, what will I discover?
Please refer to this thread :
http://4-ch.net/dqn/kareha.pl/1173833355/
Is there a future ?
No.
Who are you and why are you stalking me?
George 'Big Ears' Bush and it's none of your fucking business.
Should we bomb the hell out of Iran?
Only with gay bombs.
What is the best hair color to go with my skin tone?
Do a Britney and shave it all off. Goes with everything.
Why don't you turn off your computer and go for a walk for once?
Walks are for people with girlfriends.
Where can I hide the mittens to guarantee that nobody ever talks about them again?
In Kindness-san's backyard.
Is there actually any call for translators from dutch to english?
Only in the pornography business. And they can't import dutch pr0ns to english-speaking areas due to prudery.
Why do wire clotheshangers always become tangled up when more than one are placed in the same out-of-sight spot?
The answer is (and always will be, to every question) 42
Why do all the Grand Theft Auto sequels have at least 5 continuity errors?
42.
Is 42 funny?
No. Way to ruin a 900GET, loser.
Are tripcodes funny?
Yeah!
You saw my tripcode?
No. Selective blindness. Obliviatus flatulens, as the doc calls it.
What's the opposite of a yellow submarine?
Two iguanas in serparate jars filled with cornflakes.
Will I ever be able to play the piano again?
It is a possibility. First you are going to have to overcome the PTSD caused by getting your finger stuck between two keys.
That's not a question.
What's wrong with you!?
Because one bad thing happening to good people just isnt fair.
Whats the best way to masturbate?
Riding the city bus wearing a hoodie and lace panties.
how does a polar bear know what apples is?!
Because the zookeeper fed it to them before.
Why is the bus so late?
Because the world hates you and wants you to suffer.
Why have all my friends gone to Barcelona at the same time? It's not like they know eachother.
That's what they want you to think. Your friends are all members of the bavarian illuminati and seek to put the world, and you, beneath their fiendish feet.
If the universe keeps expanding, how come my chocolate bar isn't getting bigger?
Because you're eating it too quickly.
Would you rather be followed by 40 ducks for the rest of your life?
Yeah, I would! Juicy gamey duck meat for the rest of my life.
Why does everything have to have an end?
Without ends, there'd be no buttsex. That is clearly impossible.
How do I get out of a locked safe from the inside?
Most lockables have a glow in the dark handle that unlocks it.
If a business only deals with nanomachines, doesn't that mean it will always be a small business?
Small business usually refers to income, taxes, whether the company is public or private and so on, basically a measure of the average value of a company, and not the size of their products. So, no.
How do I catch a Golden Pidgey?
PRO TIP: Catch it until its cought
Want fries with that?
Yeah, and supersize it!
How do I lose 5kg? it's almost swimsuit season!
Eat a tapeworm egg.
I'm a guy. How do I make myself look sexy in a bikini?
Get Lorena Bobbit to make your wang fit better.
Ha sKim Jong Il ever seen the movie Team America World Police?
no, skim is a type of milk and therefore unable to patronize the theater.
do you love me?
how about that 1000 get ?
Its not as gay as YMCA
Is 4-ch Vip quality?
Not only VIP, but also DQN and Elitist
Would fapping break a vow of chastity?
No, but it might break a vow of silence.
How come there's 6 eggs in a carton rather than 8 or 4?
Because i created it to be that way <(ºω º;)!
How come this is so VIP ?
Because everyone loves unoriginal threads.
Why am I so addicted to 4-ch?
It's that old secret sauce and special herbs that keeps it tasty, fresh, and you wanting more and more and more!
Why don't people understand that if they want quality support, they have to pay for it somehow?
They're so used to QUALITY support that they've begun to fend for themselves in that "cute until they bite your head off", mildly superstitious way.
What happens when they gain enough confidence to do work on AC power lines?
They won't think. They'll feel, and be electrocuted.
What would they do without that confidence?
They'd not think, feel, and be tanasinn.
Is one truly the loneliest number? I thought 0 would be.
Zero is a uniter, not a divider.
Anyway, what's so good about today?
Nothing.
Why is there so much gay magic here now?
Because you, and only you, keep posting about it.
Why do people with no sense of humor insist on trying to be funny?
Humans have a natural tendency to reach out for what they can't have.
Why do I keep hearing people say we have three-dimensional vision?
Because they don't understand how the eye works.
Where am I?
DQN on 4-ch.net. The address bar on your Internet browser is your friend.
Who are you?
I Am.
Snoo Snoo?
We need rest. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised.
What will life like be in the year 3000?
There will be no year 3000. It all ends in 2012. DUHHH.
Why?
Because I said so.
Why ask why?
Because we're stuck at the level of a 3-year old, who likes to get a reaction out of their parents by repeatedly asking why.
Why?
Because.
What is love?
Baby don't hurt me; don't hurt me, no more.
What's your favorite song ever?
Bless yourself bleed.
Have you heard of it?
No. Go lock yourself in a room with no water or food for two weeks, please.
Why is no one smart enough to hold an interesting conversation with me?
Rotten lettuce. That's why.
Why am I so smart?