( LΦ`) I'm way ahead of my time.
i EΝEjGroßvater, sprechen Sie Deutsches?
(ίΝί) Oh mon dieu, c'est plein d'étoiles !!!
( LΦ`) Stop it, you're giving me flashbacks of WW2.
( LΦ`) que?
( LΦ`) nanda to?
(ίΝί) }z qs, ~ |~ xruxt !
( ί ί) Oh my God, it's full of Russians!
( LΦ`) In Soviet Russia... what?
(ίΝί) Mordor, o ho nono enter!
( LΦ`) Speak friend, and enter.
(ίΝί) 5001: A Time Odyssey!
( LΦ`) Who're you again?
(ίΝί) A giant pretzel!
( LΦ`) Arruckus -- men call it Doon, the Dessert Planet. It is a sugar covered wasteland entirely devoid of entrees, patrolled by a terrifying species of giant pretzel. This savage world is the setting for an apocalyptic drama. On one side is the evil baron Vladimir Hardchargin -- ruthless, voracious, extremely fat. Opposing him: Pall Agamemnides, the teen-ager who may {or may not} be the messiah. Paul's only allies are the planet's nomadic tribes, the fiercely religious, sweatsuit-wearing Freedmenmen. These forces clash in a deadly contest over Doon's one precious resource, a substance found nowhere else in the universe: the mind-altering liquid known as beer.
( ί -ί) I must not have fun. Fun is the time-killer. Fun is for
inferiors, servants and the help. I will ignore fun. I will work
through it. And when the fun is gone only I will remain--I, and
my will to win. Damn, I'm good.
( LΦ`) Man sure loves his singing.
(EΝE) Wish we did...
( LΦ`) Not too bad, Junior, not too bad.
( LΦ`) Watch out for those sunbeams, Junior. I read today that now photons have mass.
(EΝE) You mean they didn't before?
( LΦ`) Nope.
(EΦE) Those photons are eating too much lately.
Wheeeee! I'm a photon!
@@ @@Θ_Θ@@@@@@whump
@ = ίi,, ₯Φ₯jA@^άR@ @
@@@@Ό Ό@@))j:;jΦLj Damn you, Clonepa, this will not stand!
@@ί<^<^ Ό@@nj@
@@@@@@@@ @@i@@@R
@@@@@@@@@@ ΎP_ )
@=ίΘ__Θ@
=ίi LΦ`j@ ί@...so GTFO! @@@ @
@=ί_@@ Ό)=@ _ Έ^-=ί i@₯Φ₯j
@=ί >@@ Q_@m )j< @ @-=@rM@ Β
@=ί@ (@^@ί @@ ^VV_-=ίΌ €@>>
.=ί( m@=ί@@ @@@@@@@@-=@ ΅'
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@ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ |
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ |
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ | ```````````
( E-E) GRANDPA THE UNIVERSE ENDED ON 1993-09-5000 SO WAKE UP AND TAKE YOUR PILLS YOU'RE MISSING ALL THE FUN.
( LΦ`) Okay, before I kick you off the pier to drown your sad rabbit self again, explain to me how there'd be so much fun happening after the end of the universe. Seriously.
( E-E) um... you're still asleep.
( LΦ`) I have to thank you for waking me. If you hadn't shown up... my sleep... would have been eternal.
( LΦ`) Do you hear me, Clonepa?
( LΦ`) I . . . am Grandpa. I am here to send you to your ultimate fate. You'll make a fine quarry for my final hunt.
( LΦ`) This thread is making me wish that the world really did end on 93-9-5000.
( LΦ`) What a train wreck.
(LΦ` ) Now, follow me! To a land of alcohol! ...and peanuts.
(EΝE ) Yay, peanuts!
( E-E) I don't approve of alcoholic beverages.
( E-E) ...or peanuts.
@=ίΘ__Θ@
=ίi LΦ`j@ ί@Did I say you can come back here, beady?@
@=ί_@@ Ό)=@ _ Έ^-=ί i@E-Ej
@=ί >@@ Q_@m )j< @ @-=@rM@ Β
@=ί@ (@^@ί @@ ^VV_-=ίΌ €@>>
.=ί( m@=ί@@ @@@@@@@@-=@ ΅'
PPPPPPPPP|
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ |
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ |
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ | ```````````
@Ώ_Ώ
@( E-E)@ So much for constructive criticism
```````````````````````
@Ώ_Ώ
```````````````````````
@( E-E)@ Apparently bunny ears cannot be used as a flotation device.
@Ώ_Ώ
```````````````````````
@@@ B
@@@ί
@( E-E)@ Or maybe they could, if they were attached a bit better.
@Ώ_Ώ
```````````````````````
@@@ B
@@@ί
@( E-E)@ Ah the lamentations of one who is without his inflatable bunny ears. Surely I shall soon drown.
@Ώ_Ώ
```````````````````````
@@@ B
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@ B
@@ B
@( ._.)@ How much further, I wonder...
@Ώ_Ώ
```````````````````````
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@( ._.)@ Is that a treasure chest?
@Ώ_Ώ
```````````````````````
@@@ B
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@( x_x)@ Nope. Just my grave. Sigh...
( LΦ`) I was afraid he'd never shut up.
( E-E) Well, continue to live in fear, then.
( LΦ`) How many siblings does that beady fag have?!
( E-Ό)] OVER NINE THOUSAAAAND!
( LΦ`) Take those foul things off before someone sees you!
@@@@@@@ΘQΘ@ΏQΏ
@@@@@@ΏEΦE@ji@E-Ej@
@@@@@@R@@@@.ji@Βχ@X@@@
@@@@@@|PPPPPPPP|
@@@@@@|. DQN Partyvan .|
@@@@@@|QQQQQQQQ|@@
@@@@@ .||. ΘQΘ@@ΘΘ@ ||@@
@@@@@ .|| i LΦ` j@(@EΝE)@||
@@@@@ ||-||@
@@@@@ ||@QQQQQQQ@.||@-HONK HONK-
@@@@@.||QQ@@@@@@@QQ||@
@@@@@.|ZZ|ίί@ίί.|ZZ|
@@@@ .oρρρρ<RMΝL>ρρρρp
@@@@@ @@@@@@@@@ @
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@@@@@@| . DQN Partyvan . |
@@@@@@|QQQQQQQQ|@@
@@@@@ .||. ΘQΘ@@ΘΘ@ ||@@Whee, took the curve a bit
@@@@@ .|| i LΦ` j@(@EΝE)||@ too tighly there Grandpa!
@@@@@ ||-||@
@@@@@ ||@QQQQQQQ@.||@
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You can't see the face of God.
But sup anyway, Grandpa. I'll see you in a few months.
( LΦ`) Fine, but this time you're paying for the beer.
( LΦ`)
( (EΝE) )
( LΦ`) Quit staring like that. You're creeping out your grandfather.
(i@E-E@j)
(@Ν@) dizzy...
(EΝE) nurupo
(EΝE) wait, who's driving?
( LΦ`) I'm driving. I'm always driving this thread.
i E-Ej Wrong. I control this thread. I CONTROL THIS ENTIRE BOARD.
(EΝE) No wonder DQN's gone to hell.
[ ¤...¤ ] HELLO, EVERYBODY.
[@ ¤..¤n WHERE IS THAT MITTEN CRAZY ENTITY. I HAVE COME FROM THE FUTURE TO ASSASSINATE HIM BEFORE HE CREATES THE END OF THE WORLD AS YOU KNOW IT.
(EΝE) Why? 5000 came and went already.
(EΝE) ...
(EAE) Mittens is a trap?
[@¤..¤ n MITTENS ITSELF IS NOT A TRAP. MITTENS AS IT IS WILL ATTEMPT TO CREATE THE ULTIMATE PAIR OF MITTENS IN ALL THE EXISTANCE OF TIME.
[@¤..¤ n IT WILL BECOME SENTIENT, AND KILL EMPRESS REI, DESTROYING ALMOST ALL OTHER ENTITIES TO CREATE A NEW WORLD, A WORLD OF LIVING MITTENS.
[@¤..¤ n ONLY A FEW SURVIVED, FORMING A SMALL RESISTANCE. THEY CANNOT FIGHT FOR MUCH LONGER. THEY CREATED ME TO GO BACK IN TIME AND PREVENT THE WAR, AND THE CREATION OF THE ULTIMATE MITTEN
[ ¤...¤ n IT IS NO SECRET THAT THE MITTENS HAS AN UNHEALTHY OBSESSION WITH MITTENS. IT WILL DESIRE TO TURN ITSELF INTO A REAL, SENTIENT MITTEN. THAT IS THE END OF ALL..
( LΦ`) You dweebs are ridiculous. It's almost as if your attention spans are growing every day.
( LΦ`) As for mine...
( LΦ`)! Wait, what was I...
(LΦ` ) Oh yeah, alchol..
(LΦ` ) N..no wait. Zzzzzz
( LΦ`) I think the wolves finally ate the last one, Junior.
( LΦ`) Guess I'll have to whip up a new batch sometime.
(EΦE) ...im right here guys
( LΦ`) ....aaaaaand the new batch is ready.
(EΝE) Granpa,where are clonepas made?
( LΦ`) Quit calling me that Junior, I'm not your "granpa", I'm your grandpa. Grandpa. You can do it, it's not that hard.
(EΝE) Oh right, sorry granpa.
( LΦ`)
( E-E) So, Cramps, howzit goin?
( E-E) Aww, don't be like that, homeslice!!!
@ /~_@/~_@
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(EΝE) Grandpa, what was life like before this thread started to suck due to running out of original and unique content?
(EΝE) Wait, nevermind. I've already read that line... What page are we on?
(EΝE) Grandpa, how complex is the new node texturing system in Lightwave 9.2?
( LΦ`) Read the fucking manual, Junior.
(EΝE) Where can I find a torrent of the manual?
( LΦ`) Wherever google search results can be found junior.
(EΝE) Where can I find googles to get results? They do nothing, Grandpa!
(EΝE) Er, I mean Granpa.
( ί€ί) Just passing by!
( ί€ί) Is this the place where the legendary GranPops is?
( ί€ί)=ό)`Λί) Hey GranPops! Check out my punch!
( ί€ί) Okay, bye!
(EΝE) ...
(EΝE)=O)-E)
(EΝE) Cool.
( LΦ`) Junior, penis does not go in Beady Eyes
( LΦ`) Next time, use a knife.
(EΝE) Dammit, Gramps, it's a fist. A FIST. If you weren't older than the universe I'd guess you were twelve.
( LΦ`) You call that a fist?
( LΦ`)ρ)AE) THIS IS TOO MUCH METAL FOR ONE HEAD!
)AE) ... you put a dent in my face!
( LΦ`)ρ)AE) Here, use this to fill in the dent.
)A) The sunglasses, they do nothing!
()Ν() vrooom!
()Ν() Grandpa, I have BOOBIES for eyes!
( LΦ`) who fucking cares?
()Ν() The boobies, they do nothing!
( LΦ`) ...
hmm.. kneading tits
( LΦ`)Β()Ν()
(EΝE) DESU