ITT we solve the question above us. (999)

1 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4571 21:56

4 + 4 = ?

401 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4622 19:42

Muh dick.

Muh dick?

402 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4622 20:18

Please rephrase the question.

Is four sales in four hours good?

403 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4622 20:36

Depends on if you're selling cars or candybars.

Is covering 7 chapters worth of material in 3 hours a bit unrealistic?

404 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4622 22:25

It depends on the length of the chapters.

Is coming 4 times in 2 hours enough?

405 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4622 22:37

For a normal person, I guess.

How are you?

406 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4623 00:56

I'm getting the feeling that each new ansewr does a more inadequate job of solving it's question than the one before.

So I poured some vegtable oil into my eyes, and some of it managed to get into my nasal passages. Is there any danger in the situation described in the latter half of the compound sentence previous?

407 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4623 01:08

Well, a nice even coating will prevent you from pollen irritation, so I'd generally consider this to be a positive situation.

So, why exactly did you pour the vegetable oil into your eyes?

408 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4623 01:37

I lost a bet.

I just sold an item to somebody in Fukuoka. Can I start bragging to the ladies that my work is huge in Japan yet?

409 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4623 02:54

Hey, if I can call myself a novelist because I tried out NaNoWriMo once, you can call yourself whatever the hell you want.

Wii?

410 Name: My Sentences : 1993-09-4623 03:30

Wii not?

What is love?

(Baby don't hurt me.)

411 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4623 08:19

Love hurts, love scars, love wounds, and marks, any heart, not tough, or strong, enough to take a lot of pain, take a lot of pain love is like a cloud holds a lot of rain.

Who'll stop the rain?

412 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4623 17:11

Weatherbusters!

Who you gonna call?

413 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4623 19:08

844, to see what the weather will be for my fishing trip.

If Jesus is the fisher of men, doesn't that make him kind of gay?

414 Name: My Sentences : 1993-09-4623 22:42

It just proves that Jesus is completely unchristian.

When will the Servbots from Megaman Legends/Misadventures of Tron Bonne get their own series? They're the only interesting characters from those games.

415 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4623 22:54

Didn't they have a pocketstation minigame? Isn't that enough for you?!

Speaking of which, why is Namco vs Capcom still not translated?

416 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4624 00:00

Well, it's strange. Every time a team is formed to translate it, all the team members are mysteriously eaten by sharks. ~fin~

Would that be a good plot for a horror movie?

417 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4624 00:08

Well, its a 4chan meme, so it would there for be awful.

Whats you favorite flavor of dounut?

418 Name: My Sentences : 1993-09-4624 02:47

Cardboard.

Someone stole my sentences. Will you please get them back for me?

419 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4624 03:13

Hell no I won't. It's your own damn fault you lost them.

How do I doged Haduken?

420 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4624 05:15

by freeze framing

how do I shoot web?

421 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4624 08:36

Step 1: Go back to 4chan. Further instructions will be given upon your arrival.

Was I too hard on >>420?

422 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4624 08:40

No. You cannot mollycoddle those nancyboys.

How many were going to St. Yves?

423 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 00:57

Six. Exactly six.

I have way to much energy and I need to burn it off. What should I do? Tell me now!

424 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 01:03

Make this thread active again.

Infact, I think this can be a question you can answer. Do you?

425 Name: My Sentences : 1993-09-4629 01:04

Set yourself on fire.

What did God tell you?

426 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 01:19

Jesus returns tommorrow.

Are you going to ready for judgement day?

427 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 01:22

Yep. I've played through it in many RPGs already, so I should be fully prepared.

What is your favorite language?

428 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 01:24

English

Why are some people as stupid as they are?

429 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 02:20

I blame TV.

Why am I so tired today?

430 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 03:43

I blame internet.

Why am I here?

431 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 04:33

I blame God.

Why am I still up this late?

432 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 04:41

Because your waiting for a chance to do a b|b|b|b@aI

Who will be the next monar to get it's own thread on DQN?

433 Name: My Sentences : 1993-09-4629 05:10

Squeeks.

Why does "Internet Addicts" suck so much?

434 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 05:21

Because you don't appreciate the contribution that Something Awful made to the internet.

Do you think ( ) Post happy things! will sputer out before it reaches 1000? I mean, everyone used to think that the fat thread was the next big thing.

435 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 05:28

( ) I like posting until 1000!

How much does it cost to get somebody killed around here?

436 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 05:36

( `́L) Why don't you stop by my thread and ask?

( `́L) Well, are you going to answer me?

437 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 05:38

I would say "No", but I am, so yes.

Who the fuck was >>436?

438 Name: 436 : 1993-09-4629 05:55

I've been every other poster in this thread for the last hour. Thats probably breaking some kind of rule, so I'll leave after this question.

Do you like horny bunnies?

439 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 07:06

Of course! What kind of question is that?

Why does 4chan's /b/ have so many Nazis on it?

440 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 07:13

lol internet

beast or furry?

441 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 07:28

cock

Is the end nigh?

442 Name: My Sentences : 1993-09-4629 07:37

Yes. The Squeeks thread is almost at 1000.

Who... is... Captain Obvious?

443 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 09:05

A very slow-witted individual, usually one who states the most obvious thing.

Who is the tripfag above this post?

444 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 10:06

That famous chinaman, Sum Dum Bum

Where is lolocaust?

445 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 13:21

lolocaust is on Sabbatical. We last saw him at the Walpurgisnacht Sabbat.

How many wiccans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Show your work.

446 Name: My Sentences : 1993-09-4629 14:39

Two, but they have to be really small wiccans. Fuck you, I did it in my head.

Should the new anonymous name on /dqn/ be "My Sentences"?

447 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 15:08

No. While "My Sentences" is indeed beautiful, "DQN Otoko" or some variation is much more fitting. But it still sucks.

Could you explain the first half of Eureka Seven 38 to me?

448 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 15:21

Stuff happens. Then everybody dies. Or not.

How many more drinks before I pass out in a pool of my own urine and vomit?

449 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4629 15:29

"I never made it without dying. Ask Mr. Owl."

"Mr. Owl, How many more drinks before I pass out in a pool of my own urine and vomit?"

450 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4630 01:29

Let's find out. One.... thud

Why am I such a lightweight?

451 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4630 13:40

You need to WORK at vice. It wasn't meant to be easy.

What's your favorite joke?

452 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4630 14:17

Your mom.

Should Zacarias Moussaoui have gotten the death penalty?

453 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4630 15:45

He hasn't killed anybody.

Is hydrogen the future?

454 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4632 03:20

Hydrogen is the future and the past and the present. It's all over the fucking place, man.

Why is it that every time I go take a piss, I think I'm done, go back to my desk, sit down, and then a little more dribbles out?

455 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4632 04:11

Because you have urinary incontinence.

Why don't people buy energy efficient refrigerators, realizing that the money they'll save on electricity will quickly make up for the cost difference?

456 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4632 13:15

For the same reason that they buy cars that get them 2mpg, and then bitch about gas prices.

What was the kitten doing in the duel between Bruce Lee and Chuck Norris?

457 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4632 14:29

Purring contentedly.

Why is it so cold out today, after being unbearably hot for weeks?

458 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4632 14:33

It's all the fault of the corporanazis and the nucleo-industrial deathglomerates.

If I give you some cheese, will you go away?

459 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4632 16:37

Depends.

Is it Gouda?

460 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4632 16:57

Nope. Venezuelan Beaver Cheese.

If Mars is heating up at the same rate the Earth is, would it not follow that our current global warming trend is in fact the sun's fault?

461 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4632 17:09

No, its the pollution from those two rovers doing it. IT'S ALWAYS MAN'S FAULT!

Am I crazy?

462 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4632 17:54

You're as crazy as the pixie says you are.

What makes loli so very fappable?

463 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4632 20:26

Deep-seated insecurities, if not outright psychoses.

What are we going to do with all these pedos?

464 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4632 21:20

Kill them dispassionately, like one would destroy a termite nest.

Why does Amarillo have to be so crappy?

465 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4633 01:44

Because it's a city in Texas, where all things are big and suck a lot.

Has anyone else in the last 50 posts besides me actually bothered to read this from the beginning or do you have better things to do?

466 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4633 01:47

No, I was busy hitting >>208 's sister.

Will this hurry up so I can post my cleverly thought out 500 get or do I have to do 45 in a row?

467 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4633 02:08

You better not try it. I bet your 500get sucks.

When the lights go out and they play that funky music, what happens next?

468 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4633 03:38

Insert tab A into slot B

How much time is it going to take to pack up all this shit?

469 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4633 04:42

Way too long but less than you think.

Why did Haruhi hesitate in that corridor?

470 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4633 04:57

It's all an act. Part of being God is knowing that you are God.

How's the weather?

471 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4633 06:23

It's raining and I want to die

Why is that?

472 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4633 07:36

Because it's winter.

What's the most mysterious thing ever?

473 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4633 09:22

Why they ever thought inviting colbert was a good idea.

Democrat or republican?

474 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4633 13:14

I voted for Nader! I hate everyone!!

Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?

475 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4633 13:54

She's alive and well and living in a small commune outside of San Dimas, and occasionally bathes at the water park.

Is it more important to Be Excellent to Each Other, or to Party On, Dudes?

476 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4633 15:32

I think they're both important, so it's really hard to say.

What's the best party drug?

477 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4633 17:16

Ketamine. Nothing says 'party' like a bag of horse tranqs

Will they ever let me in that store again?

478 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4633 20:42

After the way you acted last time, with the ketchup going all over that dude's face, I'd say no.

479 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4633 20:44

oops, forgot question.

Daddy, why is the sky blue?

480 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4633 21:41

Ask your physics teacher about wavelength absorption.

Why does Yotsubato cheer me up every time I read it?

481 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4633 23:55

Because it's good to escape from the misery of your ruined life by reading the innocent antics of someone who has yet to permanently ruin theirs?

Is black all colors combined, or is that white?

482 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4634 01:51

Black is an absence of color, white is all colors combined, of course it matters if you are using rgb or cymk.

wtf does "lol u tk him 2 da bar|" mean?

483 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4634 08:34

It means moot didn't spend enough time on IRC to come up with a genuine chatspeak phrase.

r u mf?

484 Name: My Sentences : 1993-09-4635 07:24

No, I would be, except you stole my sentences.

Has Anonymous forgiven me yet?

485 Name: Anonymous : 1993-09-4635 09:35

Yes, my child. Go your way and sin no more.

Why were the catholics so pissed off about Mel Gipson's "Passion"?

486 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4635 12:20

Because it sucked harder than an altarboy after Mass is over

What unnamed horrors lurk in the deep?

487 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4635 12:34

You should not leave Grandma in the dark like that.

Who is r2_jane@yahoo.co.jp?

488 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4635 12:35

I dare not speak their names.

Is the universe truly as vast, cool and unsympathetic as I think it is?

489 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4635 13:16

Nope. THe universe is actually hot and passionate, though she'd probably never give you the time of day.

Are you a god?

490 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4635 13:58

Ummm... yes.

Why is it we shouldn't cross the streams again?

491 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4635 14:01

We were all gods once, we just forgot about it for the sake of playing a detective game.

Any girl here?

492 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4635 14:09

>>490 Because it would be a "Bad Thing." You die, she dies, everybody dies.

>>491 You'll need to ask your question in turn.

How do I stabilize the decoction?

493 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4636 03:40

>>492 Add 50ml of that beaker next to you.

Will we make it to 1000?

494 Name: My Sentences!3pI2s8EqCA : 1993-09-4636 10:31

Yes. On the other hand, possibly no.

Why did the Pokemon TV show turn Ash into a Pikachu at the end of one episode just to change him back at the beginning of the next? Didn't they realize how much cooler it would've been to LEAVE him that way?

(Alt: WHY am I asking a Pokemon question in the first place?)

495 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4636 10:38

Because if Ash was a pikachu there waould have been no way to subliminially influence kids with the gay Ash-Pikachu relationship.

Alt answer: Because you watched too much pokemon and were turned gay.

If you could kill your father and marry your mother without any legal problems, would you?

496 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4636 10:40

No, Freud already leaves threatening letters on my doorstop.

Should the playa be hated upon, or is it perhaps the game that should be the true target of one's haterizing?

497 Name: Anonymous : 1993-09-4636 10:43

If you don't have enough hate to spare enough for both the player and the game, you need to GTFO!

Can I get a threadstop?

498 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4636 10:46

Not until 501.

Will the 500get be funny at all?

499 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4636 10:48

Not sure.

Shall we find out?

500 Name: Captain Obvious : 1993-09-4636 10:49

i@MnLj No.

i@MnLj Are you done with your drinks?

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