<RMΝL>@Why does kimchi taste so good nida?
Yes, you will win a free iPod.
Should I go outside today?
Yes, you will win a free iPod.
Why do people think Jesus was Christian?*
*he's Jewish.
Because Christians are idiots.
When will Scott Adams's predicted Religion War start?
On the next episode of Lost.
Why doesn't my local grocery store supply Hi-C's Crazy Citrus Cooler anymore?
There's a betting pool running on how long you'll be able to survive without it.
Why did I just buy 32 copies of the Japanese translation of The Sorrows of Young Werther?
So you could sell 31 copies to some other loser who will then question his purchase.
Why?
Why not?
Why did I just buy 31 copies of the Japanese translation of The Sorrows of Young Werther?
Because people still go to watch them.
Is there anything the world needs more than a sixth season of Sailor Moon with the enemies being complete and utter moeblobs?
Yes, the world needs more pollution.
Remember when /b/ was good?
/b/ was never good.
Well, I've done the complete Carmina Burana, several anime soundtracks, DJ SHARPNEL, and Para Para Max. What should I have blasting out of my 600W car speakers at full volume with the windows down next?
Everything Hideki Naganuma: Jet Set Radio, JSRF, Ollie King, and Sonic Rush.
Should I join the Church of Scientology?
Yes, you will win a free iPod.
Now that news of Xenu are widely publicised, have Scientology joinee numbers dropped significantly?
You're not cleared for that knowledge.
Now that July 5th has come and gone many times, have any Sub-Genii demanded their money back from "Bob", or is X-day so much fun they'll keep practicing until they get it right?
All the dissatisfied SubGenii are now devout followers of Our Lady of Discord.
What's the exchange rate for 5 tons of flax these days?
6 tons of flax.
Who will you vote for? Hilary or Obama?
Stephen Colbert, as a write-in candidate.
Who will win? Colbert or Jon Stewart?
Carell.
What does he win?
Another beer!
Why hasn't the US just bombed the shit out of everything yet?
>>689
No, haven't you been paying attention to the importation of imported food additives?
>>690
Using bombs could get messy, and the University of Saskatchewan is not equipped with efficient enough shit-extraction technology.
What is a better name for a city, Regina (Saskatchewan), or Fucking (Austria)?
The latter, obviously. Anyway, Saskatchewan is boring and the people are old.
What should I do after I've marked all the Nishitetsu train lines on Google Earth?
Solve my question.
What is DQN's one weakness?
The fact that nobody in the insult thread EVER insults the poster above him.
However, how is this exploitable?
εF貓.
But, who would want to destroy the Elite Superstructure?
Those who find the connotations of affiliation distasteful.
How shall we ever stop these scoundrels?
Gay magic.
Where can we enhance our gay magic?
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Why is my diner always out of everything?
Because Marty keeps robbing your supply trucks.
Is there a better band than Tenacious D?
Wardriver.. Because he made a song about Tanasinn.
When will new computers be built with a minimum of 8 terrabytes of ram?
October
Was the internet really made for porn?
No, but that's what it was later modified to be best suited for.
What would life be like if Lord Havelock Vetinari from the Discworld novel series were to become either Prime Minister of the UK or President of the United States of America?
The trains would run on time, the economy would skyrocket, and the war in Iraq would be over. Oh, and he'd know everything about everyone.
Oops, forgot a question:
What's the best book you read lately?
Simon Haynes - Hal Spacejock.
What would happen to Ankh-Morpork if the Patrician disappeared to rule the UK or the US?
Carrot would be crowned king within a week.
Best. Band. Ever?
DragonForce. Why ask? You all knew the answer.
How should I freak out the next telemarketer calling me? I've already done the "conspiracy theorist" shtick several times, and the novelty is starting to wear off.
Ask them politely but firmly to wait a few minutes, then put them on hold and never pick it back up.
How much phlegm would Errol Flynn fling, if Errol Flynn could fling phlegm?
He's still in the intricate process of doing so and as such the quantity is immeasurable.
I can't dispute the logic of that.
Why did >>709 fail to ask a question?
Because he realised what an abject failure at life he was right after typing his answer, and could only hit Reply before bursting into tears.
Which is the funniest Eddie Izzard CD?
none, they all suck.
why do I constantly feel the need to jack off, is some one using mind control on me?
It's the pheromones of all the teenagers fresh out of school.
Why all the talk about music?
Because we're bored.
Can you suggest a better subject?
No, I was just curious.
Was it a bad question?
Yes, it's hard to come up with interesting answers to dull questions.
Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?
No, because I have two left feet.
How come it seems I am the only person who has never read a Dune book?
Because you don't live next to me. I also have never read any Dune.
What should I do with the complimentary map of Akihabara I got from the maid-costumed guide in front of Gamers during my last trip to Tokyo?
Set it aflame, along with all other relics of your weeaboo lifestyle. Then become an accountant and take up numatism.
By what method should I kill myself, and at what time and place?
Setting yourself aflame on a pyre of all relics of your weeaboo lifestyle. It beats becoming an accountant and working yourself to death.
Where outside Akiba can I get a girl in a maid costume to give me a foot massage?
Maid costumes and foot massages are forbidden on Akiba Hebrew Academy's grounds.
However, YHWH approves highly of male4male foot baths, for weary travelers.
Now, where did I leave my Yarmulke?
It's underneath your Dreidel.
Has anyone played the d20 Slayers RPG, or is it just collecting dust on store shelves?
If they give a free iPod with it it may sell.
Will you buy Manhunt 2?
I might warez it, but only if they port it to the old x-box.
What does it mean if my spirit animal is a woodchuck?
It means your only possible career options involve a degree in poli-sci or business.
Why won't these weeaboos hurry up on the Mother 1 + 2 or Mother 3 translations?
Because they're too busy translating yaoi harem manga.
Where can I find a good Sonic the Hedgehog forum?
Meditate on this question in a public place, loudly chanting the mantra OWA TAFU LAH YEM until the answer comes to you.
What is the greatest movie that ever was?
Cinema achieved it's peak at the release of Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo.
What is the greatest Sonic the Hedgehog forum that ever was?
7chan /fur/.
Which is better to see live, I've or Halko Momoi?
The latter, because her first name is Finnish for a log of wood. The kind you'd chop up and burn in a fireplace.
What happens when you cross the streams?
Total protonic reversal, if memory serves me right.
Why is this a bad thing?
It could cause all the atoms in your body to explode.
How do I get ectoplasm out of my favourite panties?
Snort it.
Why did I forget my question?
Your head could not discriminate between your brains and the ectoplasms you snorted from panties - and accidentally got rid of the former substance.
By the way, why did John Rawls have to be such a difficult writer?
Purely to spite you.
Why don't you read some Joyce instead?
My dear, I believe it is you.
Will someone fix >>737's little problems?
The free world's top scientists are working on harnessing those gaseous vapors to use as a renewable fuel source.
We've gone long enough without an answer; Where, exactly, is the beef?
In my pants.
Who wants to know?
A toothless, white-haired 105 year-old jewish woman. Please lower your trousers so she may engorge herself of this beef.
How much broccolis is too much broccolis?
One.
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Woodchuck is just a misnomer for groundhogs. Sorry to disappoint you.
What was the answer >>742 was really after?
As much wood as a woodchuck would if a woodchuck could chuck wood.
How much more obvious can a jisaku jien be?
N+1, where N is the current level of obviousness.
Why do you hate freedom?
Because it kicked me in the shin two weeks ago. Hard.
Why can't I get my Dreamcast to work after it's been collecting dust for 3 years?
Liberated from the tyranny of a rigid and unfractured Tibia.
Why do we have to die?
Because you have displeased me.
Why did my piggy bank fall off the table and break before I managed to put my first quarter in?
That was not a piggy bank, it was the newborn baby.
Also, that was not a quarter, it was a dime.
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
You've blown up your head.
How do I kill the mosquitos in my room? Mind bullets have proven ineffective so far.
I know a guy who pinned a fly to his desk with a safety pin, once. Might try that.
So, is Ruby the Next Big Thing, or a passing fad?
Ruby who?
The ruby that answers questions with statements.
Which Ruby is that?
The black one.
Should I snort Ruby, or rail it?
That made no sense to me at all. Besides, I like Ruby please dont snort.
Why was >>755 so goddamn boring that nobody answered?
Because we all watch him touch himself at night.
Why are >>755's curtains in such bad taste?
Oh, leave him alone. This isn't the insult thread, you know.
What's the best way to prevent motion sickness when playing Myst 3: Exile?
LSD. taken regularly, you will no longer witness motionsickness as it becomes part of your life.
utilitarianism is dead, isn't it? Or is it just that deontological moralistic theories are so much better?
There is very little evidence to suggest Utilitarianism ever lived, let alone died, and deontoligical moralistic philosophies require less effort on the half of the believer, thus appealing to the physically and intellectually lazy.
How long is it until America (as we know it) collapses entirely, taking the entire world into another great depression?
The United States of America (as we knew it) collapsed in 1963, and was quickly replaced by the Conglomerated Territories of Oceania.
Is there any hope in the Proles, or are they too occupied with Paris Hilton?
The proles in America? Probably not - they're too pampered and they've been raised to be accustomed to being spoon-fed. Proles elsewhere? If you whip them up a bit, then certainly.
What task shall I accomplish for DQN?
Firstly, I'd like you to properly define DQN.
So, how would you define DQN?
I can comment that you are a Panda, and that comment should serve as an example of what DQN is, for lack of a definition.
Should we talk about the proles, or rather refer to the general populace?
By referring to proles, we exclude party loyalists and ideologues, who are cognitively impaired and can not be trusted. Also, cocks.
Who lives in the east 'neath the willow tree?
The willow tree.
What did you get for Christmas last year?
Money and an iPod.
Why do you hate America?
It killed my entire family and most of my friends. I joined the base and they gave me an AK47 to get revenge, it will be just like a Charles Bronson movie. Allahu Ackbar!
Why do you hate Azerbaijan?