( ´ω`) Friends, Romans, Elitists, lend me your DQN.

( ・-・) Oh, taking this get.

(´^ิ∀＾ิ) dDDuUuuURRRR, GLUNDPORT, WHET WAS LIF LYK BEFARK THENGST?

　〜〜〜〜〜○〜〜〜〜〜〜〜〜
　　　　　　 o
　　　　　 　ﾟ。

( ´ω`) ZZZZZZZZZZ-- what the hell was that?

　〜〜〜〜〜○〜〜〜〜〜〜〜〜
　　　　　　 o
　　　　　 　ﾟ。

(・∀・) Grandpa, what was it like before we were underwater?

(´^ิω＾ิ) DdDDuuUUUUrrRRr I DUNO JINLUR, I KANG SWAMG

( ´ω`)(´^?ω＾?) "DUUUUURR I'M SOOOO COOL FOR TALKING LIKE A RETARD"

( ´ω`) I fucked up on my DURRpa puppet again? Shit.

(´^?ω＾?) I'm finally free!

　〜〜〜〜〜○〜〜〜〜〜〜〜〜
　　　　　　 o
　　　　　 　ﾟ。

( ´ω`) I told them the nukes would do strange things! But they never listened!

　〜〜〜〜〜○〜〜〜〜〜〜〜〜
　　　　　　 o
　　　　　 　ﾟ。

(・∀・) Hey, Grandpa, what's that weird circle floating on the water?

( ´ω`) It's the primordial soup.

　 -[oo]-
〜〜〜〜〜○〜〜〜〜〜〜〜〜
　　　　　　 o
　　　　。ﾟ

   /   \

( ´ω`)/ OH GOD! JUNIOR! HELP!

( ・-・) Don't bother, it's too late for him. His genetic material shall become the basis for the next generation of creation.

──　=≡∧__∧　
── =≡（ ´ω`）　 ≡　How about you go in, beady?　
─　=≡○_　　 ⊂)=　 ＼ 从／-=≡ ｒ（　・-・）
──　=≡ >　　 ＿_　ノ )）< 　 ＞ 　-=　〉皿　 つ
─　=≡　 (　／　≡ 　　 ／VV＼-=≡⊂ ､　>>
── .=≡( ノ　=≡　　 　　　　　　　　-=　 し'
￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣|
　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 |
　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 |
　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 | 〜〜〜〜〜〜〜〜〜〜〜

　〜〜〜〜〜○〜〜〜〜〜〜〜〜
　　　　　　 o
　　　　　 　ﾟ。

(・∀・) I'm wet.

( ・-・) Who knows what Grandpa sees and dreams as he spawns the next generation of life?

( ´ω`) Not you.

( ・-・) Evolution will inevitably lead to me, the highest life form of Planet DQN.

(　･ิ-･ิ) Good God, shut up already!

( ・-・) Sorry. I'll go bake that pie now.

( ´ω`) Your wife's not wearing shoes is she?
(　･ิ-･ิ) Hell no.
( ´ω`) Kickass.

(・∀・) Grandpa, are you a foot fetishist?

( ´ω`) Yes.

(・∀・) Grandpa, you're sick. You should seek mental help for that.

( ・ω・) Rabbit foot, eh?

( ´ω`) Junior, you're a judgemental little twerp. Go to your room.

(・∀・) And you're a mentally ill degenerate. Get yourself checked in to the mental hospital.

( ­­ˉ_ˉ) I don't believe that beady eyes is actually possessive of a sexuality.

ｶﾞｯ　　　 ∧__∧　 ∩
　　　　　（,,´ω`)彡☆
　　　　　　⊂彡☆))∀・) ow dammit ow ow ow
　　　　　　　☆

(・∀・) Go! Goddoman!

＊＊危ない！＊＊

　　　　　　　　∧＿∧
　　　　　　　（；ｺｺﾞｯﾄﾞﾏﾝ)　　　＜　危ない！
　　　　　　 __〃｀ヽ 〈＿
　　　γ´⌒´-−ヾｖーヽ⌒ヽ
　　／⌒　 ｨ 　　　｀ｉ´　　）; ｀ヽ
　 /　　 　ﾉ＾ ､＿__￥＿_人　　|
　 !　　,,,ノ爻＼_　_人　ﾉｒ;＾ >　 ）
　（　　 <_ ＼ﾍ､,, ,+､ｒﾉ/　　/
　　ヽ_　　＼ ）ゝ､__,+､_ｱ〃 ／
　　　 ヽ､___ ヽ.=┬─┬〈　 ｿ、
　　　　 　〈J　.〉､| 神. |,　|ヽ-´
　　　　　　/"" 　|　　 |:　|
　　　　　　ﾚ　　 :|:　　 |　ﾘ
　　　　　 /　　 ﾉ|＿＿|　|
　　　　　 |　,,　 ｿ　 ヽ　　）
　　　　　.,ゝ 　 ）　　ｲ ヽ ﾉ
　　　　　ｙ　｀ﾚｌ　　 〈´　 ﾘ
　　　　 /　　 ﾉ　　　|　　 |　　　　　　　　　∧∧　 ... "´
　　　　 ｌ　　/　　　　ｌ;;　 |　　　　　　　　　(；´ω`)
　　　　 〉　〈 　　　　 〉　 |　　　　　　　　 / つ⊃
　　　 /　　::|　　　　（_ヽ　＼､　　　　 〜（　,つ
　　　(｡ｍｎﾉ　　　　　 ｀ヽｎｍ　　

(；´ω`) Oh shi**, ｲt's Goddomaﾝ!

(・∀・) Goddoman! Destroy that degenerate fool!

( ´ω`) Hey, wanna beer?
（；ｺｺﾞｯﾄﾞﾏﾝ)　Hell yeah!

|´ω` ) Let's go!
|ﾞｯﾄﾞﾏﾝ) Yay Beer!

|彡
|彡

(・∀・) ...

(・∀・) I hate you Grandpa.

(・∀・) I hate every part of you. I hate your ugly, wrinkled face, a sagging lipless absence for a mouth only set off by two beady little clouded eyes, caught in a permanent squint. I hate your old, cracked, scratching voice which drones on and on, always imparting some worthless factoid or senility-inspired rant. I hate your mind, Grandpa, which knows not shame or love or beauty or honor, but only conceives of greed and malice and spite and that most loathsome trait of all, lust, which has overrun that which has not been yet taken by outright madness and old age.

(・∀・) HEAR ME NOW, DQN! I SWEAR AN OATH ON THIS DAY, TO NEVER REST UNTIL I HAVE SLAIN GRANDPA WITH MY OWN TWO HANDS!

Respect your elders!
　　　 ∧__∧　 ∩
　　　（,,´ω`)彡☆
　　　　⊂彡☆))∀・) ow dammit ow ow ow
　　　　　☆

(#∀・) Child abuse! You all saw it!!!

( ・-・) I saw it! Never before have I been so stupefyingly entertained.

( ﾟ -ﾟ) You totally deserved that, Junior.

(　･ิ-･ิ) I only saw grandchild abuse. No child abuse here.

（　｀ハ´）Hmmm. I'd need to see it demonstrated again, if you will.

（　#ハ´） Archenemy abuse! You all saw it!

(#∀・) I thought you were supposed to hurt your arch enemy.

（　#ハ´） But I always win!!!

(・∀・) Heal!

　　　 ∧__∧　 ∩
　　　（,,´ω`)彡☆
　　　　⊂彡☆))∀・) ow dammit ow ow ow
　　　　　☆

(#∀・) Was that really necessary?

( ´ω`) Yes.

((#)∀・) Ah, it has swollen.

(( # )∀・) Ow....

((　#　)∀・) Grandpa help me!

　　　 ∧__∧　 ∩　If you insist.
　　　（,,´ω`)彡☆
　　　　⊂彡☆))∀・) ow dammit ow ow ow
　　　　　☆

((###)∀・) ...

((###)∀・) Grandpa, why do you hit me?

( ´ω`) Yes.

ヽ(。_°)ノHAY GRANPA derp

( ´ω`) I'm sorry, did you say something?

ヽ(。∵∴_∵∴°)ノ NOM NOM NOM

(´^ิω＾ิ) dDDuuUurrrRRRrr STUP DTEELIN MUG BIT, KLUND

((###)・∀・) Grandpa, what was it like before 4chan came here?

( ´ω`) back then, putting sage in the Link field was the polite thing to do.

(#∀・) It's just a cute little tard isn't it?

(´^ิω＾ิ) dDDuuUurrrRRRrr duR dUr

( ´ω`) No, its not.

　 ∧__∧　 ∩
　（,,´ω`)彡☆
　　⊂彡☆))ω＾ิ) DUR! DURDUR! DUUUURRRRR!
　　　☆

( ´ω`) That felt good.

(・∀・) DQN, I would like to announce that I am leaving you to train on Mount Dokkyun until I am the strongest man in the universe. Then, and only then, shall I return, to make good on my oath and slay Grandpa.

(・∀・) I mean, I'm off to camp, grandpa!

(・∀・) (I think he'll buy that story)

( ´ω`) Have fun at camp.

( ´ω`) (once he's outta here, I'm moving to Baltimore.)

( ・-・) Sounds awesome, guys.

( ・-・) (once they're asleep, I'm going to stuff so many pills into their faces...)

(・ω・) (∴∵∴∵∴∵∴∵∴∵∴∵∴)

Meanwile, waiting at Mount Dokkyun...

（　｀ハ´）.oO(Two weeks of being eaten by mosquitoes and having to supervise dozens of brats... why did I volunteer for this ridiculous idea for a summer camp?)

(´^ิω＾ิ) dDDuUUuRrrrRRr ABUS! NUE RAF SLAW MIT!

(・∀・) (Nobody told me there really was a children's camp on this mountain!)

（　｀ハ´） Junior, stop staring into space and finish your macaroni picture.

Meanwhile, in Baltimore...

( ´ω`) Thar's a car!
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Whar?
( ´ω`) Ova thar!

Meanwhile, in Machu Picchu...

(´^ิω＾ิ)

（　｀ハ´）This Inca summer camp blows. As if these brats weren't enough da live lama spat on me.

(・∀・) Darkpa, I must kindly ask of you to tutor me in the arts of manly battle, so that I might become the strongest man in the universe and best the evil and degenerate Grandpa in a combat to the death.

(´^ิハ＾ิ) dDdDDduUUUrrR OKAY GUNWOR, FMIRST LESSORN. A B A B UP DOWN LEFT UP IS HOWT TU DOS KACK. I ALM GUD AT JAMES.

（　｀ハ´）Don't listen to him, that was just a science project I was working on that went wrong, very VERY wrong. But as for your fighting matter, if you just believe in yourself and travel to distant lands, you will become mighty.

（　｀ハ´）..Wait, you said you'd kill Grandpa?

（　｀ハ´）Hm..Let me know when this judgment day occurs. I shall assist you.

（　｀ハ´）Until then, try to avoid getting glue all over the table.

（　｀ハ´） Well, it's about time.

(´^ิω＾ิ) Ever time you kill me, I become stronger.

(´^ิω＾ิ) I
(´^ิ∀＾ิ) Will
(´^ิ-＾ิ) Replace
ﾐ*´^ิｰ＾ิ) Each
(´^ิヮ＾ิ) And
(´^ิハ＾ิ) Every
<丶^ิ∀＾ิ> One
щ(´^ิД＾ิщ) Of
(屮´^ิД＾ิ)屮 You
(凸´^ิД＾ิ)凸 Until
((/ (´^ิ.ㄟ) I
(⊺●Д＾ิ) Am
⊂二二二(´^ิω＾ิ)二二二⊃ The
　 へ-ﾍ
　 ﾐ*´^ิｰ＾ิﾐ Only
〜(,_ｕｕﾉ
　　　　╭―勹　　　
　　　　（(Ⅻ)）
　　　　(´^ิД＾ิ)∩ One
　　 ⊂|：乂：| /　
　　　 ノ⁁ へ　
　　　( ク　＼ク
　　　　 |￣￣|　　
　　　＿|＿＿|＿　
　　 　 (´^ิmƣิ) Left.
　　　-‐‐- 、
／　　　　　ヽ
!　 !　人|,.iﾉl_ﾉ）
i 　乂´^ิ　＾ิ　! i Just
＼ヽ .ゞ　- ﾉノ
　　｀｀フ　i´
　 　 / ＼ﾉゝ
　　/__i |丱!|
━━つ━つ━━∞∞∞========

　　　人　　　　　
　　（＿_）　　　　
　 （＿＿）　　　
　（ ＿＿ ）　　　　
　（　´^ิ∀＾ิ）　＜ Wait.
　（つ　　 つ　　　
　｜ ｜　|　　　　　
　（_＿）＿）

( ´ω`) Okay, thread's all yours. I'm gonna go get hammered.

|ω` ) And I am OUTTA HERE...

|彡

(´^ิω＾ิ) Huh? Fuck, now it's no fun anymore.

(´^ิω＾ิ) Oh well. He'll be back.

(´^ิω＾ิ) They always come back.

(´^ิ∀＾ิ) Durr?

(´^ิω＾ิ) No, Hurr.

( ・-・) Man, you guys are really good at derailing threads.

(´^ิ-＾ิ) Of course we are.

(''†ิω†ิ) Oh god, it's beautiful.

Spoilers: (´^ิω＾ิ) doesn't really exsist, he's just ( ・-・) imagination running amuck.

(´^ิω＾ิ) Is this the real life?

( ^ω^) OMG IM SO KAWAIIIIII!!!!

田中

ﾐ*ﾟ-ﾟ) Hi Grandpa. I forgot what my gimmick is.