orz if you plz
Please translate this...
3 ：[名無し]さん(bin+cue).rar ：04/09/26 08:10:26 ID:RTZR0flE
>>1のクラスメートです。
１がこのような糞スレを立ててしまい、大変申し訳ありません。
この機会に、１がなぜ今回のような事態に至ったのかを、お話ししたいと思います。
あれは、とある日の自習時間中のことでした。突然、教室内に「やめてよーっ、○○君！！」
という１の絶叫が響き渡りました。
声のした方向を振り向くと、１が数人のいじめっ子たちに羽交い締めにされていました。
そのうちの一人、Ａ君がゲラゲラと笑いながら、１のベルトをガチャガチャとはずしています。
そうです、いじめっ子たちは、１のパンツを脱がそうとしているのです。
１は必死に足をばたつかせて抵抗するのですが、その足すら二人掛かりで押さえられて
しまい、とうとう肉体的に抗う術を失ってしまいました。
「やめてよーっ、やめてよーっ、やめてよーっ！！」
１の絶叫が再度響き渡ります。周りをよく見ると、クラスメートたち・・もちろん女子たち
全員も、この光景に注目していました。
ズルッ！
Ａ君によって、１の黒い学生ズボンがおろされました。１の白いブリーフが露わになります。
ブリーフの幅広ゴムの部分には、おそらく母親が書いたものでしょう、○○と１の名前が
大きな字でマジックで書いてありました。 洗濯の際に便利なのでしょう。
「さあ、みなさん、いよいよご開帳ですぅ〜！」
Ａ君が声をあげます。そうです、次に脱がされるのは、当然１のパンツです。
１はすっかりと観念した様子でした。多分、こんな事を考えていたのかもしれません。
「（パンツがおろされる瞬間、きっと女子は目をつぶってくれるさ・・・・・）」
「（もしかしたら、１人くらいは見るかもしれない）」
「（でも・・・・そうさ、５人までなら、見られていないことにしよう）」
・・・・こうでも思い込まなければ、１の精神はこの時点で崩壊していたのでしょう。
しかし・・・・・
・・・と
(continues)
4 ：[名無し]さん(bin+cue).rar ：04/09/26 08:10:46 ID:RTZR0flE
ズルッ！
Ａ君の手によって、とうとう１のパンツがおろされました。
プルルン！
１のオチンチンが、外気と人目にさらされます。
瞬間、
「ギャハハハハハハハハハハハハハハハハハハハハハハハハハハハハハ」
クラス中に、大爆笑が起こりました。
１のオチンチンは、典型的な短小真性包茎だったのです。しかもオチンチンというよりも
できものって感じでした。異臭すら放っていました。僕は少しだけ１に同情しました。
周りをよく見ると女子たちも、１のオチンチンを見つめて、指をさしながら笑っていました。
「キャー、いやだ〜」
「あんなんなっているんだ〜」
「きもちわるい〜」
「グロテスク〜」
と感想を口々にしながら。
１がパンツを脱がされる直前に、願っていたであろう事は、粉微塵に砕かれたのです。
１は、クラスの女子全員に、自分のオチンチンを見られてしまったのです。
耐え切れない羞恥心と屈辱感で、１は泣いていました。それこそ、狂ったように。
いえ、本当に狂ってしまったのかもしれません。
あの日以来、１は学校に来ません。
自室に引き籠もり、鬱憤晴らしに、 ２chにアクセスしては糞スレを立てる毎日です。
僕たちは、来年、高校受験という人生の大切な節目を迎えます。
みなさん、１に言ってあげてください。励ましてあげてください。
辛いのは、君だけじゃない！ （僕もこの間、道を歩いていたらドブに10円落としました）
来週の月曜からでいいから、きちんと学校へ来い！・・
Thank you...
translation provided AS IS (slightly embellished because im lazy):
Hi this is 1's classmate.
I sincerely apologize on behalf of 1 for his starting this shitty thread.
I'd also like to take this opportunity to shed to some light as to why 1 is behaving like this.
It was a typical day at school during free (study) time.
All of the sudden, 1's piercing screams rang throughout the classroom: "Stop it ＯＯ-kun!!".
As I turned to see what was happening, there was 1, locked in a full nelson, roughed up by some bullies.
One of the bullies, A-kun, could hardly contain his laughter as he proceeded to remove 1's belt.
Yes that's right, these bullies were trying to depants 1.
1 was kicking and struggling to break free, but the bullies physically subdued 1 by grabbing his legs.
"Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!!" (cont.)
(onomatopoeia representing someone's pants being removed)
But the deed was done... A-kun had finally removed 1's pants.
(onomatopoeia of a penis flopping around)
1's penis was exposed for all to see.
At that moment, the entire class erupted into hysterical laughter: "BWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA"
1's penis was a textbook case of a phimosis (a medical condition where the foreskin is attached to the glans of the penis by connective tissue) afflicted small weewee.
To make matters worse, it was more like some kind of a wart or a pimple rather than an actual penis.
Plus it even gave off an unpleasant odor.
At that moment I (slightly) sympathized with 1.
As I looked around I noticed that the girls in the class were pointing and laughing at 1's penis.
"Ewwww!! Gross!!!"
"Look at that thing!"
"That's so nasty!"
"Grotesque even!"
As for 1, all of his hopes of preventing his depantsing had been utterly crushed.
He had his pecker exposed in front of every single girl in the class.
Unable to handle the sheer humiliation and the embarrassment, 1 broke down in to tears.He was crying so hysterically that I thought he had totally lost it.
In fact, maybe he did lose it... We'll never know for sure.
Ever since that day, 1 stopped coming to school.
He's locked himself up in his room, and he spends everyday venting his frustrations by starting shitty threads on 2ch.
Next year, we have to take our high school entrance exams. Needless to say it's a very important time for us.
I want you guys to help cheer him up. Show him some support!
Tell him that we all have to deal with hardships from time to time! (like the other day I dropped 10 yen in the sewer)
As for 1... I don't care if it's next Monday... Just come back to school ok?
Could someone explain what 「ところがギッチョンキリギリス」 means?
left-handed (clumsy) grasshopper? :)
It simply means "ところが", the latter part is a poor attempt at humor and has no real meaning.
I see it mentioned in various places on the net, though, like http://life.2ch.net/yume/kako/1026/10267/1026799022.html and http://kisara8.fc2web.com/hukkyu/table.htm.
"Patience, little grasshopper, patience..." :)
Translate the following INTO japanese for some 2ch spamming pls.
Dear Zipperheads:
Why do you refuse to accept responsibility for the numerous attrocities commited by the japanese people against the people of Asia in the early half of this century? Why do you continue to visit a shrine dedicated to the memory of vicious murderers and war criminals? Hiroshima and Nagasaki are only a fraction of the punishment you deserved.
Fuck you,
UR PAL CUNT <- translate that part especially
12 is DQN
and how!
親愛なるZipperheads: なぜ今世紀の早い半分のアジアの人々に対して日本の人々が託す多数のattrocities のための責任を受け入れることを断るか。なぜ不道徳な殺人者および戦争犯罪者の記憶に専用されている神社を訪問し続けるか。広島及び長崎はあなたが値した罰の唯一に一部分である。 のUR PAL のCUNT 性交しなさい
>>12 is a poor attempt at humor and has no real meaning.
>>and has no real meaning.
Nanking 1937, fucking wotakus.
Nice e-mail addy: CUNT@MOSSAD.IL
What's with the Mossad and il suffix? You Jewish? Don't even get me started on the "attrocities" committed by the Israeli gov't... cunt
Honorable Mr. Cunt.
We understand you have big concern about actions of our fine country.
In regards to Nanking incident, that is so strange!
I do not know how that could happen!
But, rest assured, that I will make sure, it does not happen again!
There is nothing to worry about!
We Japanese are very simple people with very small penis.
(so small!)
What can we possibly do with such small penis?!
>>12 Should go back to DQN and stay there before I ban their arse. Don't bring crap like that here.
*Hello.*
*I can't take the phone right now.*
*Please leave a message or call back later.*
Something like that, for my cellphone.
Please write with romaji or KANA, I'm not able to read kanji.
>>22
Will you record them on your answering machine?
Anyway, let me try it.
But I think it's better to say your name
after Hello, like you do in English:This is ○○.
It's because it sounds natural to Japanese people as well,
when they both get on the phone and take the phone.
Plus, Japanese people often don't ask for
calling back if it's on the answering machine.
I don't know why, though.
*Hello.*
もしもし。
*This is ○○.*
こちらは○○です。 ＊○○＝your name
*I can't take the phone right now.*
ただいまでんわにでることができません。
*Please leave a message.*
でんわにめっせーじをおねがします。
>>23
はい。
Recording it on my answering machine was what I thought of. I don't pronounce Japanese perfectly, but at least it's possible to understand (and I like to believe it is quite good).
It does seem more polite to say your name after saying hello, kind of letting the caller know who he or she is calling to. The part about not asking people to call back may also be because it would be rude to make them call again. I don't know.
Thanks a lot for your help, I will try to record it afterwards.
>>24
Don't mention it.
And, yes, your explanation about returning one's call
makes good sense to me. You'd come across as a bit arrogant
if you made the caller to call you back.
As Japanese people know their language is difficult to learn,
especially for English-speaking people, they will be pleased
to hear you talk in Japanese, even if you don't pronounce
it perfectly.
がんばってね！
>>24
In my experience, Japanese hate it when gaijin speak their language. They prefer to stare at you blankly while you speak english than have a foriegn dog use their mother tounge.
>>26
Imagine a foreigner comes up to you. Would you prefer:
1) Them speaking their own language, which you learned a little in school but might not know
2) Them at least attempting to speak English
Never think of Japan as a separate planet.
Is this a translation thread?
Could you tell me what "my world is askew" mean?
What's the connotation of it?
Hmm, that's tough. "Askew" means approximately "off-balance", so when someone says their world is askew they mean to say that they are confused or lost, I guess.
More literally I think it would be "Something is wrong with my world."
Sorry if that's not a very good answer.
No! Your explanation was easy to understand!
Now I'm clear. Thanks a lot.
in almost any case, it usually best to attempt speaking their native language, and in certain circumstances, might speak right out in your own.
when in rome, do as the romans do.
あけましておめでとうございます。今年もよろしくお願いします。
How about this with KANA:
"Your Japanese may be bad, but mine is far worse."
That could come in handy almost all the time.
kana is impossible to read
日本語に訳せばいいの？
i suppose
What would you say "どこのどういう方なのかしらってね" means?
Looking on the net, it seems "どこのどういう" is some sort of idiom, but I do not really understand what it means.
>41
"どこのどういう方なのかしら"
="どこの方なのかしら"+"どういう方なのかしら"
"どこの方なのかしら"
→"Where does he come from?" or "Where does he belong?"
"どういう方なのかしら"
→"Who is he?" or "What kind of person is he?"
>37
"Your Japanese may be bad, but mine is far worse."
→"あなたのにほんごはへたかもしれないが、わたしのほうがずっとひどい。"
>>41
I was wondering where he/she lives/comes from and
what he/she is like.
Plus, women often use this expression.
It's somewhat formal and polite.
And it depends on the context but sometimes when they
use it they implies
that they don't like his/her behavior or attitude.
On the contrary, when men use it, it sounds to me a bit unnatural except for gays(by that I mean men who loves men).
All right, that makes sense. Many thanks!
(This is for http://cerealandmilk.net/iichan/, in case you are curious.)
>On the contrary, when men use it, it sounds to me a bit unnatural except for gays
or it sounds like old literary style
>>48
I've never heard the expression.
It sounds very literary to me. Are you being sarcasitic
when you use the expression? Or is it humorous?
Maybe "What planet are you from?"?
I mean "What color is the sky on your planet?", I never heard that expression.
As for something more generic, "Where are you from?" can be used as an insult. But I don't know if this was used in Victorian times. Maybe "Where are thou from?" :P
Whar is yo' fum?
Where is you fum?
Where are yer from?
www.rinkworks.com/dialect/
>>51
Thank you. I got it.
>>46
So you are a fan of Japanese comics.
Do you know "Turumoku Dokushinryo" (Turumoku
dormitory for singles). It's my favorite, though drawed
over 10 years ago. I devoured the series of those comic books.
The story begins when a boy called Shota starts to work
for a manufacture of furniture. He's just moved to Tokyo
from his county, though his love(who is a high-school girl)
is left behind. He's very pure but after
Shota meets his colleagues(and they also are very facinating),
he has a crush on a girl named Miyuki, who is very beatiful,
cheerful and good-natured. And she seems to like him.
But as Miyuki comes to know Shota is hanging out with Tomomi,
his love(though far apart), she doesn't want to ask him out.
And so does Shota. As he works, he's faced with many things which stand against him.
The readers of this manga must sympathize with him,
because he's struggling with what they also have struggled with/
will be faced with in the future. The romance is another
feature, of course. Which of them will he choose?
A facinating characters with a sense of pathos.
I wish non-Japanese people would read this story, too.
Sorry, I'm too wordy.
>>53
I am a fan, yes. But I don't really know enough kanji and words to read japanese text without a dictionary, so if I try to read something in japanese, it's really slow. So mostly I read other people's translations, either those that have been officially translated and are sold in book stores, or translations by fans on the net. Sometimes I do my own translations of short comics.
But mostly only new comics are translated, both officially and by fans. Nowadays, a lot of comics get translated, but ten years ago, there were not many translations, so finding a translation of an older comic is almost impossible.
>>54
I see.
Ten-year-old mangas may be hard to find, especially
if they're not translated into English.
To my knowledge, Toriyama's world, a fan site of a manga auther
(whatever the website name is), has translated his mangas
and uploaded them. I enjoyed them before.
Do you know about Akira Toriyama, by the way?
It may strike you silly for a Japanese to
read translated mangas, but for me it's very interesting
and meaningful because I'm learning English.
Think this is a cultural exchange in a way.:)
And I tried to download what they call torrents on your(?) site.
(I don't know exactly what torrents mean, though. I heard an
expression "torrential rain" before, but it isn't fit
for the scene.)
So could you tell me how I can download the torrents?
Or is the system(which should've allowed me to download them)
not available now?
↑Sorry I forgot to write this.
I asked you how because I wasn't able to download the torrents.
>>56
Torrent files are downloaded using the program BitTorrent: http://bittorrent.com/download.html
It's a simple P2P system where everybody who downloads also uploads parts to others, so you can distribute large files without using up a lot of bandwidth on your site. It's very easy to use, just install the program, and then click on a link to a .torrent file in your browser.
And the word "torrent" means a huge flow or downfall of something, often water. That's where "torrential rain" comes from, and "BitTorrent" is meant to give the image of huge flow of data to your machine, since a BitTorrent download can be quite fast.
There is also a directory with normal downloads here: http://cerealandmilk.net/iichan/archive/
It's just not linked from the front page, since it's better for us if people use the torrents instead.
>>55
Also, I do know about Akira Toriyama, but I haven't really read anything that he made. I did see a little bit of the Dragonball anime, translated into German. This was quite strange.
Most of my favourite comics come from the _Afternoon_ magazine. It is a magazine more aimed at otaku than people in general, I'm told. A lot of comics from that magazine have become quite popular in English, both through official translations and fan translations. One of my favourites is _Yokohama Kaidashi Kikou_, which is being translated here: http://ykk.misago.org/
>>52
> "Where are you from?" can be used as an insult.
Can it? Maybe if you're being sarcastic, maybe...
Yep, it's said in a scathing tone of voice, and used instead of replying to an innocent/simple/newbie question.
Newbie: "Where is [place]?" or "Why is [situation]?"
Self-Assigned, I'm-too-Important-to-answer-questions guy/girl: "Where are you from? Go back to [school/your mommy/etc.]."
Granted, I haven't seen it used often.
>>58
Thanks a lot.
I understood what I was supposed to do
to download torrent files.
Now I'm just downloading the first file, which
takes my PC a little more than two hours to complete.
And torrents can be used
figuratively. that's very interesting to me.
Thank you for your clear explanation!
Concerning the _Afternoon_ magazine, I didn't know about
it, but I want to try reading it!
There must be lots of things we haven't realised are
very nice and good. As a matter of fact, an English
vocabulary book "Moetan" sold in Japan has been popular.
The book must have been categorized as Otaku books before.
And as another examle, Seiji Ozawa, a world-famous music conductor (at least I heard so), was praised first by overseas people, not Japanese, as you may know.
So I'm curious about Emma now.
I did find scans of the Moetan book on the internet, and I read it. The English in it is not always very good, perhaps, but I thought it was quite funny, at least to an otaku. It's probably a good motivation to learn, if you think the book is funny.